Boy Meets World S4E12 - English Transcript

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I "I took the one less traveled by "And that has made all the difference" Okay. Now, what do we take from this poem? (SHAWN SNORING) CORY: Yip-yip-yip-yip-yip. (SNORING) Yip-yip-yip-yip-yip. (SNORING) Yip-yip-yip-yip-yip. Interesting. In my class, Mr. Hunter handles the yipping. Shawn! Shawn, it's both of them. Oh, no. Now I don't know which class I slept through. Mine, Hunter. Remember, The Road Not Taken? A remarkable poem in which the poet tells us that we make choices in life, and each choice puts us on a new road that can have a profound effect on our destinies. How does a poem about a guy on two roads have anything to do with our lives when we can't even drive yet? Isn't he fun? I like to think of him as job security. Mr. Matthews, what was your last choice in your life? Well, I did just get a job for Christmas break. I'm a gopher at Little Pauley's restaurant. And I got me this soft, cushy union job down on the docks. This year, I'll finally be able to buy nice presents for my friends and family. All right. I want you all to keep a journal of the choices you make over the next week. Then I want you to write a paper on the potential of those choices to change your life. Mr. Turner, what if my choice is to not do the assignment? You want this one, George? No, no. Your class. I get them after lunch. Well, then you would get an "F," not get into college, spend your time hanging out at the local convenience store, waiting for them to bring in a new batch of lottery tickets. this'll be your first Christmas in the city, huh? Oh, yeah. I'm really looking forward to it. Of course, it won't be quite like Christmas in the mountains. Bet it's nice up there. Oh, yeah. While me and my brothers are out back, cutting down a tree, Mama's in the kitchen cooking a goose, and baking pies and cookies, (VOICE BREAKING) and everybody's all happy and warm and loving each other. I miss them so bad, I could just cry. Oh, that's right. That's okay. You just use me as your handkerchief. (SNIFFS) And she did. I never realized how much I missed my folks. But now I live in the city, and there's simply no way for me to be with them this Christmas. Yes, there is! No, there isn't. I will drive you there. It's 500 miles. Good! (EXCLAIMS) Oh! Thank you, Eric! Who are you? Hi. I'm Cory Matthews. Sam over at the bar hired me to bring people drinks and run errands part-time because I wanted to earn a little extra money Stop talking now. Yes, sir. What's that? Uh, cappuccino, sirs. Sam at the bar said I should bring you some Sam at the bar thinks he knows what I like? I would never Sam at the bar has a tendency to run off at the mouth. I don't like tendencies. I don't like mouths. You understand what I'm saying? I do, but I'm scared. Who made this? Who made this? Answer him, and choose your words carefully. I did. Hey, it's fantastic. Try it and tell me if I'm wrong. I'll tell you if you're wrong. I'll tell you if you're wrong. You're right! This is good. (LAUGHS) All right. Well, I did take the liberty of adding a dash of cinnamon. This is for you, kid. Wow! $20. Keep slingin' them cappuccinos, maybe I come up with another 20. Then a-slingin' I'll be, and if you gentlemen need anything I'd like you to accompany my new young bride to the beauty parlor. You know, keep an eye on her. Well, I don't think I can do that, sir. Sam at the bar gave me a list of things to do. We'll clear it with Sam. Don't worry about Sam. Sam. Sam. (BOTH LAUGHING) Shawn. A little breakfast? Lunch. I'm on lunch. It's 8:30 in the morning. I've been working in the docks since 3 a.m. Do you know how cold it is at 3 a.m.? Nippy? Yeah. Nippy. Do you wanna watch me break my ear off? Sit, darling. I'll make you some hot chocolate. I thought you said it was easy on the docks. Well, that's what it said in the brochure. So I show up this morning, and the wind-chill factor is, like, Jupiter, and I go up to the boss and say, (MUMBLES) and he goes, "Yeah, but you took the job." And I go, (MUMBLES) and he goes, "That's nice. "Christmas presents for your friends." And I said, (MUMBLES) and he goes, "Oh, look. Turkish freighter." And all of a sudden, in comes a Turkish freighter. Unexpectedly? Out of the mist it came. That's my wonderful job, Cory, 3:00 in the morning, 50 below, unloading the same Turkish freighter that brought in the Outbreak monkey. Do you know something? If I go, you go! (SCREAMING) Now you get no cocoa! So, how's your job? Well, it's tough. It's very tough, Shawn. It's brutal. You got a cushy job. Yes! Yo, coffee boy, if I might. Watch me make 20 bucks. Yes, sir, Mr. Fountain. Hey. (BABBLING) Oh, yes, of course. There's the other part, where I do something. You take this envelope. You go to the mailbox on 14th and Pine. And make sure no one sees you. Nobody. Put this in there. Okay, okay. Now, you both know how I'm not one to ruffle feathers, but, uh, there is no mailbox at 14th and Pine. Today, there's gonna be a mailbox on 14th and Pine. And Mr. Fountain is never wrong about mailbox placement. Oh, okay. Um, once again, if I may, if you really want this mailed, you should consider putting a stamp on here, and maybe even an address. You're a noticer, aren't you? I noticed that you're a noticer. Not to worry. This envelope is definitely getting to where it's supposed to, right, sir? Do you have any idea who you're working for? Yeah. Mr. Fountain and Mr. Martini and Sam. (CHUCKLES) Sam! Why? What's going on? Nothing. Nothing. Not a thing. You're working for the mob. But the nice mob. Yeah. Yeah, the nice mob. Come here. (GROANS) All right. I have to quit. I have to quit. I can't work for the mob. Little more cappuccino here. Every time I try and get out, they keep draggin' me back! Mr. Fountain Yeah, what is it? I quit. Okay. You can't keep me here. We'll miss you. I, I don't like to be threatened. You made a fine cup of cappuccino. Thank you, thank you. (STAMMERING) But I gotta go. Bye. Come on, let's go. Okay, okay. I'm coming. Kid's a lunatic. Look, about my friend. Um I know sometimes he seems a little chatty, but trust me, he's a smart kid. You don't have to worry. Loyalty. You're loyal to a buddy. I like loyalty in a person. I like it on the stand. You do? Hey, Lou, it looks like we got an opening for a job here. Hey, Mr. Loyalty, are you interested in a job? Hey, Shawny boy, you know what I got a taste for right now? Hazelnut biscotti, sir? That's what I was thinking. Well, then this worked out perfectly. Hey, Lou, did I tell you this was a good kid? Was I right? So, Shawn, you ever wonder we got a nice restaurant here, yet we have no customers, but we make a nice living? I figure you do a good take-out business. Good take-out business? Yeah, we do a good take-out business. Take-out business! Take-out business! (BOTH LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY) Shawn! Cory, what are you doing here? No. What are you doing here? You should be at school. Oh, come on, man. Jobs like this don't come around very often. You know that. You worked here. Yeah, but I quit when I found out that things weren't, you know, as the FBI would prefer. You know, this is just a nice family restaurant in a quiet neighborhood. Nothing's going on here. (LOUD ***) (CAR MOTOR STUTTERS) That was a car backfiring. Yeah. Yeah. Looks like it was. Then why are we on the ground? 'Cause it's fun, and we do everything together. Look, Shawn, we both know a job like this cannot lead to anything good. It doesn't lead anywhere, okay? It's just a job for a couple days so I can buy decent presents for my friends. Yeah. I just worry it's gonna change you. It's not gonna change me. (SPEAKING ITALIAN) (SPEAKING ITALIAN) What? What? Never thought this Christmas I'd be driving 500 miles with someone who makes the whole turnpike experience seem so alluring and voluptuous. Eric, I don't want to alarm you, but I'm getting this powerful feeling. Really? Well, we are in pretty close quarters, and that cozy holiday spirit's in the air, and you are getting the full impact of my right profile. We should stop the car. Oh, goody. Look, Eric, you may be less experienced about this, so whatever I say you gotta do it without question. Good. I've always dreamed about this. You dreamed about the blizzard? Wha Eric, the feeling I've been having is that there is a very big and powerful blizzard headed our way right now. No. No, no, no. A blizzard? Just a few flakes in a romantic snowflake setting. We're trapped in an icy tomb of frozen death! It's just 4 or 5 feet of dense pack. Don't panic. (WIND WHOOSHING) You're right, you're right, you're right. I work in a wilderness store. I sell survival equipment. I think I know what to do. Mark everything up 30%! How am I doing? You're fogging up the windows. Now just calm yourself. And protect you. It is my responsibility to protect you, and protect you, I will. (GRUNTS) I've hurt my head. Ho ho ho, my best friend. What's this for? Christmas Eve's not till tomorrow night. I know that, but I just bought you the best present I ever actually paid for, and I wanted to see your face light up like a happy little elf. So, light up. Light up, little elf. It's a watch. A very expensive watch. Which I can't accept. Why not? Because of where the money comes from. I had it engraved with your name. "To my best friend Cory." Shawn, thanks. Hey, listen, now that you finally bought your friend a nice gift, you can quit your job, right? Cory, it's easy money. How can I quit easy money? Listen, I made $160 working there. You can have that. That's even easier money. All you have to do is quit. No, no. Spend it on Topanga and your family. I'll see you around. Shawn, wait. You're still gonna be here tomorrow night for Christmas Eve, right? Yeah. Hey, don't worry, don't worry. That's a tradition I'd never miss. Hey. Yeah? Thanks for the watch. I appreciate it. Not because of what it costs, but because of who it's from. You're welcome. (KNOCKING ON DOOR) He's okay. He's just got a little knock on the head. Hey, Mommy. Hey, Daddy. Oh, no. More horsey. More horsey. Eric, honey, are you all right? I thought you two were on your way up to Lonnie's folks' house. Never made it. Ran into a nasty squall, 4 feet of snow. We had to stay in the car until the plow dug us out. It was no big thing. How did he bump his head? Like this. (EXCLAIMS) Well, you two must be starved. I'll go warm you up some soup. I'll get you some blankets. So, Lonnie, how'd I save us? Eric, I didn't wanna scare your folks, but we both nearly died back there. Died? When the snow fell and the temperature dropped below freezing, I wrapped my arms around you and held you as tight as I could. No, you never did that. I would've remembered that. You were unconscious. You were holding me and I was unconscious? Mm-hmm. You were shaking and shivering and turning all blue, so there was only one thing left to do to survive. You ate my leg? No, Eric. I had to warm up your body, so I remembered the old trapper's trick. I stripped your clothes off of you, and I stripped mine off of me, and I wrapped us both up in a tiny tight sleeping bag all naked. (GASPING) (CRYING) But, Eric, we survived. So what. Lonnie, when you're surviving with someone like that, you have the common courtesy to wake them up. You kick 'em, smack 'em, yell in their ear, "Hey, we're naked!" Here you go, a hot bowl of soup to warm you up. Oh, great, I'm awake for the soup. Mr. Fountain, Mr. Martini, the place is all cleaned up, so if there's nothing else, I got a little Christmas Eve thing with my buddy. Actually, there's one more little favor I need tonight. Ooh, tonight's real tough for me, Mr. Fountain. Uh Two hundred dollars. I want you to take this box, go down the street, stand in front of the warehouse, car will come by, a guy will ask for it, you will give it to him. He will give you an envelope. You bring it back here. Now you do that for us, kid, and maybe we find something a little more permanent. How would you like that? What are you doing here? Come on, let's go. You're working much too hard. Now, we're having Christmas Eve over at my house. Nothing you're doing here could be nearly as important, so come on. Let's go. I got paid for a job, and I'm gonna do it. Ooh, loyalty. I like that in a worthless little coffee boy who they don't care if he lives or dies. I've never had money like that before, Cory. It makes me feel like somebody to be able to buy nice presents for my family and friends. Yeah, I'm sure that's a real nice feeling. Hey, what's in the box? I don't know what's in the box. I have nothing to do with this box. I am merely the box holder. No, come on, open it up. I wanna see what's inside. I wanna see your face light up like a happy little elf. Open it up, my little elf. Cory, you know, I don't wanna spend my life in front of a convenience store waiting around for the next batch of lottery tickets. Shawn, he was exaggerating. Yeah, well, it rang pretty true to me. So this is it. This is the road you're taking. This isn't a road, this is a box. And as long as I don't open this box, I don't know what's in it. There's a teddy bear in this box. Oh, a teddy? Okay, okay, so come over to my house, we'll put the teddy under the tree, and at the end of the night we'll play a little game called "let's guess the street value of the teddy." How'd this get so complicated so fast? I don't know. I guess that's how they get you. They find a guy who feels like he's nowhere in his life, and they make him believe that where he should be is on a street corner holding a box in the middle of Christmas Eve. Yeah, well, maybe this is my street. You know, maybe no matter what I do, this is where I end up like that poem says. No. No, see, the poem says you have choices in your life. And every choice you make means something. I mean, Shawn, we're only 16 years old, and we got fooled by a couple of guys who look like our uncles. I mean, do you see how easy it is to end up on the wrong road? Yeah, and I knew all about them, too. I didn't walk away. You see, I figured I'd just get them some coffee, make some money, and get out before it got to this. Then why are you here? I don't know. I guess I thought I was one of those street-smart guys. But now, I'm a little scared. You know, Shawn, I didn't see this coming at all. I mean, I thought the devil was supposed to be some guy with horns and a big tail. Cory, it's Christmas Eve. You should be with your family. No. No, see, that would be the wrong choice. See, the difference in the poem is that that guy had to choose his road alone. So you don't think he had a best friend? No, I guess not. But according to this, you do. "Two roads diverged in a wood" And I choose the one that leads back to your house. Good. We should probably take this back first. Wouldn't it be funny if there really was a teddy bear in there? Yeah. Don't you wish life was like that? I'm beginning to see that it's not. Oh! This is exactly the shirt I saw in that window and told you I wanted and made you buy it, and now I have it. You like it? I love it. But I do kind of miss the surprise element. Hey, Lonnie, (LAUGHS) there's a blizzard. Uh-oh. (SHUDDERING) Now I'm unconscious. Save me. Eric, it never happened. I made the whole thing up. You did? Yup, sorry. Cute butt, though. Okay, folks, everybody get together now. Real close. Look right here, into the camera. Okay, I have set it. Everybody smile. Smile.