Crackòvia : The oratory of Bielsa / Bielsa 's oratory

"Boys, today's game is... Hide me!" "What's up?" "If he sees me, he won't stop talking. Damn, he's seen me!" MARCELO BIELSA Athletic Club coach He talks a lot and talks too slowly That is, he's Argentinian "Hi, Marcelo. How's it going?" "If you ask me how it's going, I'll say that's a complicated question. It's so complicated because, if you're referring to my mood, I'm feeling satisfied with the conviction of the work well done." "He's used more vocabulary in a sentence than me in my whole life!" "The truth is yes." "Boys, go and play. If we have to wait for him to finish, we'll never start the game. Come on!" "If you're referring to my physical condition, I'll tell you that I ate some peppers a few hours ago and they're repeating on me..." "And if your question is referred to the situation in...." "So what, coach? Is he still going on about that?" "He doesn't stop talking! Go and try a powerful shot. Let's see if he'll stop when losing." "I can't, coach. It's forbidden." "What are you saying?" "It's the rule of the schoolyard: No powerful shots are allowed. And I've always followed everything I learned at school." "That rule is not valid here. Go and shoot powerfully. And you'll see how the referee won't tell you a thing!" "The truth is yes, coach! Powerful shots are not forbidden! And I've got him to stop as well." "If you're asking how the beard suits you, I'll say I prefer clean-shaven men." Full-time FC Barcelona 2 - 0 Athletic Bilbao "But if you're saying how it's going the second season of The Walking Dead, I'll tell you there're fewer and fewer zombies." "No! What I said at the beginning of the game is what about if you keep quiet and let me watch the game. But it doesn't matter: It's over." "Ah, what about the game! Well, I think the final score reflects the effort of both teams..." "Coach, we're leaving." "Don't leave me alone!" "The night bus to Badia is about to leave." "Well, if you leave, I won't renew. And if I won't renew, you know who'll take over from me... Marcelo, the boys want you to explain them the history of football." "Very well, very well. Let's see. In the Pleistocene, Velociraptors played as wide midfielders, Close to the touchline. Whereas Diplodocus used to play... In that period, Australopithecus played with three defensive midfielders and two wingbacks." "What are you doing, Johan?" "I'm looking for the moment he talks about me in the history of football, but this guy is going on and on!" "Jesus Christ set up a team of twelve apostles. As football is played with eleven players, Judas was always a reserve, and then..." "Jeez, Johan! I didn't know football was so old." "And I didn't know how someone can speak so much without running out of saliva!" "Napoleon was a terrific coach, but he retired after losing the World Club Cup in Waterloo. But before talking about Napoleon, we should go back to the 12th century..." "Johan, take it off. My ears are sore." "You're right."