Tyrion Lannister Best Moments - 3

Sit. You'll be fed. Untie them. Ah, rapers. They were given a choice no doubt castration or the wall. Most choose the knife. Not impressed by your new brothers? Lovely thing about the watch you discard your old family and get a whole new one. Why do you read so much? Look at me and tell me what you see. Is this a trick? What you see is a dwarf. If I'd been born a peasant they might've left me out in the woods to die. Alas, I was born a Lannister of Casterly Rock. Things are expected of me. My father was the Hand of the King for 20 years. Until your brother killed that King. Yes, until my brother killed him. Life is full of these little ironies. My sister married the new King and my repulsive nephew will be King after him. I must do my part for the honor of my house, wouldn't you agree? But how? Well, my brother has his sword and I have my mind. And a mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone. That's why I read so much, Jon Snow. And you? What's your story, ***? Ask me nicely and maybe I'll tell you, dwarf. A *** boy with nothing to inherit, off to join the ancient order of The Night's Watch, alongside his Valiant brothers-in-arms. The Night's Watch protects the realm from ah, yes yes, against grumpkins and snarks and all the other monsters your wet nurse warned you about. You're a smart boy. You don't believe that nonsense.