Ttc Baby 1 Vlog 4

hi what's up how's it going I'm checking in from a new spot today sorry about the blue light. I don't know if you can tell or not but I can tell. :( Ya that's just because I broke my light and ya. So I don't know I've just been tryna keep busy. I really hate trying to get pregnent, because wanting it as bad as I want it really sucks. Like, I think about it every single day all day. All I think about is baby names, baby clothes, what to do, baby this, baby that, uh baby anounc.. pregnancy anouncements, I think about babies more than I think about getting married, but I don't know. My whole passion and dream in life is to be a mom, ya know. And I know that has be with being a wife but getting a big ol fancy wedding doesn't mean, like my whole marriage is gonna be big and fancy ya know. So it's like I don't know I'm just like really excited to be a mom. I can not wait. But it's not happening as fast as I'd like so that kinda sucks. So I've been tryna do stuff to keep my self occupied. That doesn't really have to be mandatory of me or anything thats going to stress me out. I just wanna relax and not think about it to much so like I said I've been loking at a lot of pregnancy anouncment videos. They are so cute I love them so much. And so what I was thinking and I actually started thinking about this in like June but it's kinda cute because it lasted this long. So it's like in June I got this little guy. I call him Jimmee, he is just my little gorilla and my Idea was that I was going to put him in my parents house in fornt of the doorway where they come in when they come home from work and stuff and I was going to have him sitting there with the little onsie that said "Grandpa's Cowboy"? I think it says. I don't know I havn't put it on him in a long time. It also had a little bib that says "Grandma's little helper". So I thought that was so cute and I .. But that's not happened yet so, kinda sucks. But I don't know it's kinda been fun to because now he's like kinda my little buddy and I just kinda like play with him every once in awhile. I don't know I'm excited to have a Real Boy, ya know. It'll happen eventually I'm just tryna be as happy as I can this year's been pretty tough and like, I'm tryna stay as positive as I can. I keep telling everyone 2014 that's like February 14 the year of love. Like it's gonna get better. And I don't know I'm really excited about it this so my horoscope is, for the Chinese I'm a horse and for the Astrolgy one I'm a Leo. So if I get pregnant this November I can have a Leo Horse which is like just like me and I'm like awe so excited. So that's what I'm kinda crossing my fingers for right now. But if that does't happen then I still have hope that in 2014 good stuff is coming and I'm just staying as positive as I can for the future. So, thanks for watching and subscribing you guys are all so sweet and beautiful. Wish you all baby dust and I'll talk to you later k, bye.