Harbin, China

[ LAUGHTER ] [ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] ♪ GIRL, I WANNA DO IT ♪ ♪ DON'T YOU WANNA DO IT? ♪ ♪ WHEN WE GONNA DO IT? ♪ Bourdain: REALLY TWO OF MY FAVORITE THINGS, ACTUALLY, TOGETHER IN ONE PLACE -- FREEZING TO DEATH AND KARAOKE. [ HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYS ] REALLY, JUST ADD GENITAL TORTURE TO THAT, AND WE'VE GOT REALLY THE PERFECT TRIFECTA OF [BLEEP] ♪ YOU KNOW YOU WANNA DO IT ♪ ♪ QUIT PLAYING, GIRL, AND DO IT ♪ ♪ DON'T YOU WANNA DO IT? ♪ ♪ WHEN WE GONNA DO IT? ♪ ♪ CAN WE DO IT? ♪ I'M ANTHONY BOURDAIN. ♪ THAT'S RIGHT ♪ I WRITE. I TRAVEL. I EAT. AND I'M HUNGRY FOR MORE. ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ YOU GOT TO ♪ ♪ GET LOST ♪ -- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY THE TRAVEL CHANNEL, L.L.C. CHINA IS BIG -- REALLY BIG. A THOUSAND MILES NORTH OF BEIJING, YET ANOTHER CHINA I HAVEN'T SEEN BEFORE, A PLACE WHERE THE WINTERS ARE BITTER, PENETRATING COLD IN A LAND ONCE KNOWN AS MANCHURIA. THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE MUST HAVE BEEN VERY COLD. HARBIN IS THE LARGEST CITY IN WHAT'S NOW CALLED THE DONGBEI REGION. LITERALLY THAT TRANSLATES TO "EAST NORTH" -- ABOUT AS EAST AND NORTH AS YOU CAN GO, BY THE WAY, WITHOUT FINDING YOURSELF LITERALLY IN SIBERIA. I'D TALK TO YOU AND TELL YOU ALL ABOUT HARBIN... BUT I CAN'T MOVE MY FACE. IT'S TOO COLD. [ GROANS ] OHH. IT'S COLD. DID I SAY THAT? AN OMNIPRESENT, RELENTLESS COLD. I'M TOLD ICE CREAM IS VERY POPULAR WITH THE LOCALS, THOUGH I'VE SEEN LITTLE EVIDENCE TO SUPPORT THAT, GIVEN THE TEMPERATURE. DON'T SEE, YOU KNOW, FROLICKING CHILDREN HOLDING ICE-CREAM CONES. I BELIEVE I'VE BEEN MISLED FOR PURPOSES OF COMEDY. OOH! OOH. THIS IS THE LAND OF THE MANCHUS, ONE OF CHINA'S ETHNIC MINORITIES, THAT ENDED UP RULING THE WHOLE COUNTRY FOR 300 YEARS, ENDING ONLY IN 1912. ORIGINALLY DEVELOPED BY THE RUSSIANS AS THE CHINESE TERMINUS FOR THE TRANS-SIBERIAN RAILROAD, SINCE THEN, IT'S SEEN A LOT OF HARDER TIMES. THE DONGBEI PEOPLE ARE TOUGH -- VERY TOUGH -- HARDWORKING, HARD-LIVING, AND HARD-DRINKING. I HAVE TO SAY THAT COLD IS NOT THE ONLY FACTOR HERE. THERE'S A SORT OF CONSTANT HAZE OF COAL SMOKE. THIS WILL GIVE US SORT OF A "I'M STUCK IN THE GARAGE" FEEL TO BREATHING HERE. IT'S THE CARBON MONOXIDE THAT MAKES IT DELICIOUS. TO REALLY SEE THIS PLACE, ONE MUST NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF THE FACT THAT IN THE MIDDLE OF SKIN-PEELING COLD, THEY'RE BUILDING THINGS CONSTANTLY. THE CRANES, HUNDREDS OF THEM, AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE, BUILDING THE NEW WORLD ORDER. AFTER ALL THAT EXPOSITION, I'M ABOUT READY TO WARM THE [BLEEP] UP. REALLY. SO IT'S A NORTHERN ACCENT? YEAH. SO, JAMESON. MEET ALAN WONG. HE'S CHINESE FROM DONGBEI, BUT HE TALKS WITH A BELFAST ACCENT. HE LIKES IRISH WHISKEY, AS ANY SENSIBLE PERSON DOES, DESIGNING AND RUNNING VERY SUCCESSFUL NIGHTCLUBS, AND THIS PLACE, FOX PUB. DID HE DRINK IRISH WHISKEY? [ LAUGHS ] SO, WHO DRINKS HERE? SO THEY NEED IRISH WHISKEY AND DARTS AND -- YEAH, YEAH. DARTS IS A BIG THING HERE. OKAY, SO WHEN IN CHINA, I'M ALL FOR DRINKING IRISH WHISKEY, BUT THE FOOD? WHERE ARE WE GOING TODAY? WHY? I'M NOT ANY RANDOM WESTERNER, MY FRIEND. "FAT" IS MY MIDDLE NAME. AFTER A COUPLE OF WARMING BREAKFAST BEVERAGES, ALAN SUGGESTS WE STROLL OVER FOR AN EARLY LUNCH. I HAVE BY THIS TIME FORGOTTEN THAT IT'S 25 BELOW ZERO OUTSIDE. OHH! [ BOTH LAUGHING ] WHAT'S THE SMELL IN THE AIR? IF YOU'VE GOT A FIREPLACE IN YOUR HOUSE, YOU'RE BURNING COAL? YEAH. FROM THE CARBON MONOXIDE? DAO WAI IS A WORKING-CLASS NEIGHBORHOOD, WHICH IN MY EXPERIENCE USUALLY MEANS THE KIND OF FOOD I LIKE, ESPECIALLY IN CHINA. BUT TRUTH BE TOLD, AT THIS POINT, I'D HAPPILY NIBBLE TWINKIES OFF THE SEAT OF A HARLEY, AT *** FESTIVAL NO LESS, JUST TO ESCAPE THIS [BLEEP] COLD. [ SHUDDERS ] [ LAUGHS ] OH, MAN, IT'S PENETRATING COLD! [ BOTH LAUGHING ] NOW, THEY DON'T SERVE BEER TOO COLD HERE. IT'S CONSIDERED BAD, 'CAUSE IT'S SO COLD OUTSIDE, RIGHT? [ LAUGHS ] CHEERS, MATE. ZHANG FEI PA ROU -- I WAS GONNA SAY "MY KIND OF PLACE," BUT ANY PLACE INSIDE IS MY KIND OF PLACE RIGHT NOW. FORTUNATELY, THIS REALLY IS FIVE KINDS OF AWESOME. AND BY FIVE I REFER, OF COURSE, TO THE LEGENDARY FIVE LAYERS OF HAPPINESS, THE ALTERNATING STRATA OF LEAN PORK MUSCLE AND ETHEREAL FAT LAYERED INTO A TRINITY OF FLAVOR AND TEXTURE SOME CALL PORK BELLY. TO SAY THIS PLACE IS PORK-CENTRIC WOULD BE AN UNDERSTATEMENT. PORK BELLY, PORK MEATBALLS. PORK MEATBALLS. YOU'RE TELLING ME... YOU'RE SURE THAT'S TOFU? THAT LOOKS LIKE NOODLES TO ME, MAN. MMM! OH, MAN, THAT'S GREAT. PORKY, SAVORY, MOIST, DELICIOUS. OH, AWESOME. IT'S NOT A STRETCH TO SEE WHY I WOULD BE HAPPY HERE. YOU'RE HIT IN THE FACE WITH A WARMING WALL OF SWEET, SAVORY, AIRBORNE PORK PARTICLES AS SOON AS YOU WALK IN THE DOOR. AND THERE IS, AS WELL, BEER. OH, YOU GOT TO LOVE THAT, MAN. COME ON. IT'S FANTASTIC. AND IF YOU THROW SOME OF THE PORK ON TOP OF THE TOFU -- OUT OF SIGHT. THE FLAVORS ARE JUST INCREDIBLE. TEXTURALLY, I MEAN, INCREDIBLE. I LOVE THIS PLACE. LOVE IT. THEY DO A VERY NICE BUSINESS HERE, AND EVERYBODY COMES -- FACTORY WORKERS ON BREAK, BUT ALSO, IT APPEARS, THEIR BOSSES AND THEIR GOOMAR. IT'S AN INTERESTING MIX. I MEAN, YOU GOT THE LADY IN THE WHITE LEATHER BOOTS AND THE WHITE FUR COAT AND THIS FAMILY. THEY EAT IN THEIR COATS, IN THEIR SNOW PANTS. AND THEY BROUGHT PLASTIC BAGS TO TAKE IT HOME. CAN'T LAY OFF THIS TOFU. OH, MAN, I DON'T WANT TO EAT ANYWHERE ELSE TODAY. I JUST WANT TO EAT HERE ALL DAY LONG. MAYBE ONE MORE MEATBALL. OH, THIS IS UNBELIEVABLY GOOD. [ SINGING IN NATIVE LANGUAGE ] WHEN YOU LOOK INTO THE FUTURE, FEAR NOT, BECAUSE IF THIS TITAN OF THE NEW CHINESE ECONOMY IS TO BE BELIEVED, WHATEVER HAPPENS, IT WILL BE FUNKY. WHERE WOULD TWO BUSINESSMEN LIKE ALAN AND I GO FOR A SOPHISTICATED MANCHU-STYLE DINNER WHEN IN HARBIN? THAT WOULD BE ZHAO JI LAO PU. TIME TO GET BACK ON THE PONY AND RIDE. THIS IS KOOKY. I'VE NEVER HAD ANYTHING LIKE THIS. ZHAO JI LAO PU'S SPECIALTY IS THE IMPERIAL CUISINE OF THE QING DYNASTY. OH, THAT'S WHAT? IT FEELS LIKE GLASS NOODLES. I'M TELLING YOU, WHEN I HEARD ABOUT THE PICKLED CABBAGE, I WAS THINKING, YOU KNOW, HOW GOOD CAN THAT BE? THAT'S GREAT. FOOD UP HERE IS NECESSARILY HARDY. THINK HARSH WINTERS, VERY SHORT GROWING SEASONS, A CULINARY TRADITION THAT EMPHASIZES PRESERVING AND ENHANCING WHAT INGREDIENTS AND FLAVORS ONE HAS. DEER TENDON, WHICH PEOPLE LOVE EVERYWHERE YOU GO IN ASIA, WHICH I LOVE, TOO, AS LONG AS IT'S COOKED THIS WELL. THAT'S A TEXTURE THAT WESTERNERS DON'T AUTOMATICALLY GRAVITATE TOWARDS. WE'RE TAUGHT NOT TO LIKE THIS. LITTLE BIT OF A BITE FOLLOWED BY A JELLY. MMM! MAN, IT'S GOT GREAT FLAVOR, TOO. SO, WAIT A MINUTE. THE SWEET-AND-SOUR PORK FROM THIS AREA? OH! FINALLY THE MOTHER LODE! YOU KNOW, OH, MY GOD, IT'S LIKE, YOU KNOW... SWEET-AND-SOUR PORK -- OH, WHAT A DIFFERENCE. HOW DID WE GET FROM THIS TO THE PSYCHEDELICALLY COLORED, GLUEY, STICKY, NASTY, DEEP-FRIED DUBBINS OF MYSTERY MEAT AND PINEAPPLE CHUNKS OF THE SAME NAME? I LOVE THAT [BLEEP] BY THE WAY, SO DON'T GET ME WRONG. BUT THIS? THIS IS SWEET-SOUR PORK LIKE I'VE NEVER HAD. OH, OH! IT'S HOT. CAREFUL. MMM! WOW! OH, MAN, IT'S WONDERFUL. THE CRUST IS LIGHT AND AIRY, AND THERE'S MORE SOUR THAN SWEET. THAT'S NICE. I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO EAT SWEET-AND-SOUR PORK AGAIN. THEN WE HAVE THIS DEER-BLOOD THING, NOT SO MUCH A SOUP AS A CUSTARD -- A BLOODY FLAN, IF YOU WILL -- AND ALSO VERY TASTY. WOW. IT SITS UP LIKE PUDDING, HUH? TO COAGULATE. MMM! OH, WOW. IT'S DELICIOUS, HUH? RICH, SALTY, SAVORY. WELL, I THINK WE DID GOOD WORK HERE TODAY. GREAT MEAL, GOOD BEER. [ LAUGHS ] GAN BEI. AS ALWAYS, NIGHT TURNS INTO DAY. BUT THIS ONE IS SPECIAL FOR SOME REASON 'CAUSE OF JIHI. HELLO! CIAO. THIS IS THE MAN, THE PHENOMENON, THE BUSINESS EMPIRE THAT IS JAI JIHI. [ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] [ BOTH LAUGHING ] RIGHT. AND THIS IS USABUCKS, A CARGO-CULT VERSION OF A SALOON FROM THE AMERICAN WEST, BUILT BY A GUY WHO'S NEVER EVEN BEEN TO THE AMERICAN WEST BUT WHO HAD CLEARLY DREAMED OF DOING SO. [ LAUGHS ] JIHI IS A NOT-SO-EXTREME EXAMPLE OF CHINA'S NEW HIGH-ROLLING BUSINESS ELITES. BORN POOR, HE MADE IT VERY BIG WITH A CHAIN OF VERY POPULAR HOT-POT RESTAURANTS. SO, I HAVE TO ASK, WHAT DO HIS BUSINESS COLLEAGUES, FRIENDS, OTHER PEOPLE AROUND HERE -- WHAT DO THEY THINK OF HIS GREAT INTEREST IN WESTERN CULTURE, IN COWBOYS, WESTERN MILITARY? [ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] AT SOME POINT, JIHI DECIDED TO JUST TAKE IT EASY, ENJOY HIS MONEY, AND HAVE A REALLY GOOD TIME DOING THINGS HIS WAY, MEANING INDULGING HIS TASTE FOR AMERICAN MILITARY UNIFORMS AND HARDWARE, COWBOY STUFF, WESTERN WOMEN, AND GETTING WHAT CAN ONLY BE DESCRIBED AS KIND OF LATE-ERA STUDIO 54. [ LAUGHS ] BEAUTIFUL. CHEERS. WELCOME TO HARBIN AGAIN, TONY. [ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] [ UP-TEMPO DANCE MUSIC PLAYS ] [ SINGING IN NATIVE LANGUAGE ] WHEN IT'S POINTED OUT TO ME THAT MANY OF THESE ARE SORT OF DISCO VERSIONS OF THE SONGS FROM THE ULTRA-MAOIST CULTURAL REVOLUTION DAYS, SONGS JIHI ONCE HAD TO SING TO GET BY TO ESTABLISH SUFFICIENT COMMUNIST ENTHUSIASM TO AVOID A WORK CAMP OR WORSE, WELL, IT ADDS A CERTAIN POIGNANCY, AN ELEMENT OF ANGER, A FRENETIC NOTE TO WHAT OTHERWISE LOOKS LIKE HE'S PARTYING LIKE IT'S 1979. [ SINGING IN NATIVE LANGUAGE ] [ SHOUTING ] AWESOME! WHO KNEW THE CULTURAL REVOLUTION COULD BE FUNKY? BRILLIANT. BRILLIANT. WELL, I HOPE SOMEDAY WE CAN EXTEND THE SAME HOSPITALITY TO HIM IN AMERICA. [ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] I WILL NOT, HOWEVER, BE SINGING AND DANCING, BUT... [ LAUGHS, SPEAKS NATIVE LANGUAGE ] BUT I MAKE A PRETTY FUNKY CASSEROLE. YES, I BELIEVE... [ LAUGHS ] WHEN WE COME BACK, A LONG, DRAWN-OUT, UNCOMFORTABLE MEAL PUNCTUATED BY AWKWARD SILENCES. EVERY TIME I SEE A SNOWBOARDER, I FEEL LIKE I'M 100 YEARS OLD. GET IN MY WAY. [ CHUCKLES ] YES. CHINA HAS ONE OF THE BIGGEST AND BUSIEST RAIL NETWORKS IN THE WORLD, THE CAR HAVING YET TO BE AFFORDABLE BY ALL. THEY DON'T ALWAYS DEPART ON TIME, BUT IT'S A RELATIVELY SAFE AND INTERESTING WAY TO SEE THE COUNTRYSIDE. I LEAVE THE SMOKE AND GRIME OF HARBIN BEHIND FOR A FEW DAYS TO SEE ANOTHER SIDE OF THE NEW CHINA. CLACKING MY WAY THROUGH FROZEN CHINESE COUNTRYSIDE, ON A CLEAR DAY, YOU CAN NEARLY SEE ALL THE WAY TO RUSSIA. I'M TAKING THE TRAIN TO YABULI, WHERE CHINA'S PREMIERE, AND REALLY ONLY, MEGA-LUXE SKI RESORT IS NEARING COMPLETION. SUN MOUNTAIN YABULI RESORT -- PRISTINE CONDITIONS... IN A MOUNTAIN NOT YET OVERRUN BY OTHER SKIERS. FIVE YEARS FROM NOW, THIS PLACE WILL PROBABLY BE PACKED, BUT TODAY, IT'S PRETTY EMPTY. SEE HOW FAST WE CAN GO. HI, GUYS. HEY, HOW ARE YOU? DOING GOOD. HAVING FUN. HOW'S THE SKIING? OH, MAN, IT'S AWESOME. GRAHAM KWAN AND PATRICK FOURNIER ARE ANOTHER KIND OF ENTREPRENEUR IN THE NEW CHINA. THEY HELP DESIGN AND BUILD AND RUN THIS PLACE FOR AN INTERNATIONAL CONSORTIUM OF INVESTORS. YOU WANT TO DO A RUN WITH US? LET'S DO IT, MAN. OKAY, MAN, LET'S GO. LET'S SEE IF GRANDPA'S STILL GOT IT. [ SIGHS ] WELL, THAT'S NICE. A LITTLE TRADITIONAL CHINESE FOOD ON THE WAY UP TO THE TOP. IRANIAN CAVIAR -- NICE LITTLE MOUNTAIN SNACK. HEATED LEATHER SEATS, BEVERAGE COOLER. WELCOME TO COMMUNIST CHINA. NICE. IT'S EASILY THE MOST LUXURIOUS LIFT I'VE BEEN IN, YEAH. WELL, THANKS FOR THIS. GAN BEI. NO. WELL, YOU KNOW, THIS COUNTRY, ANYTHING'S POSSIBLE. YOU KNOW, YOU NEVER KNOW. THIS OPPORTUNITY OVER HERE FOR US IS JUST GONNA GET BIGGER AND BIGGER. THERE'S MORE AND MORE PEOPLE SKIING ALL THE TIME. IT'S A WHOLE OTHER WORLD THAN IT ONCE WAS, HUH? WELL, THE FUTURE'S HERE. TO THE FUTURE. TO YOURS AND CHINA'S. THANK YOU. FORTIFIED BY ALCOHOL, I DID SOMETHING FOOLISH. MIDDLE OF A BLIZZARD, I THOUGHT, "ONE MORE RUN. "WE'LL TRY OUT THIS LUGE THING THEY GOT. IT'LL BE COOL." CAMERAMAN TODD LIEBLER CAN GO DOWN IN FRONT OF ME -- BACKWARDS, OF COURSE -- THEN I'LL FOLLOW, AND IT'LL LOOK GOOD. WE'LL GET SOME NICE SHOTS. PROBLEM IS, BRAKES DON'T WORK SO GOOD ON THESE SLEDS WHEN THERE'S ACTUAL SNOW IN THE STEEL TUBE. AND, WELL, IT ALL PAID OFF TO HILARIOUS, IF EXCRUCIATINGLY PAINFUL, EFFECT, AS YOU'LL SEE. TODD STARTS SLIDING OFF HIS SLED, WHICH MEANS I CATCH UP VERY QUICKLY AND SMACK INTO HIM. [ CRASHING ] THEN WE'RE ALL THROWN OFF OUR SLEDS AS WE HURTLE DOWNHILL. FINALLY, WE COME TO A PRECARIOUS STOP, AND EVERYTHING SEEMS FINE. Man: WATCH IT! WATCH IT! WATCH IT! [ CRASHING ] YOU OKAY, TONY? ARE YOU OKAY? MY HEAD SNAPS BACK ON MY NECK LIKE A BOBBLEHEAD AT A DEMOLITION DERBY, LEGS IN THE AIR, *** OVER TEA KETTLE, A BIG TANGLE OF LIMBS, AND HEY, WE'LL LAUGH IT OFF UNTIL THE X-RAYS, MAN. ALL GOOD. [ HORN HONKS ] I CAN TELL YOU I'M READY FOR SOME HOT COCOA BACK AT THE LODGE. THAT'S FOR [BLEEP] SURE. THANK GOD FOR THE SOFT, PLIABLE CUSHION THAT WAS TODD FOR SAVING ME FROM EVEN WORSE INJURY. NIGHT FALLS OVER YABULI, AND DESPITE THE PAIN FROM WHICH I WILL SUFFER NO DOUBT FOR THE REMAINDER OF MY DAYS, I'M HELPLESS TO RESIST AN OFFER FROM THIS GUY, WHO SAYS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING FOR THE REST OF THE SCENE, AND HIS WIFE, SHELLY, INVOLVING MEAT ON A STICK. THIS IS A REGULAR FEATURE OF THE NEARBY TOWN OF YABULI -- THE MOBILE RESTAURANT, A SORT OF MOTORBIKE-POWERED DOUBLE WIDE SERVING WHAT LOOKS AND TASTES VERY MUCH LIKE YAKITORI. Bourdain: MEAT ON A STICK? BARBECUED STEAKS. YEAH, BARBECUED STEAK. AND THEY GOT CHICKEN HEART, CHICKEN LIVER, AND BABY BUTTERFLY. THE KITCHEN'S OUTSIDE, WHERE, NEEDLESS TO SAY, IT'S COLD -- VERY COLD. POPULAR DISHES HERE ARE CHICKEN HEADS AND BUTTERFLY LARVAE -- NOT YOUR USUAL FARE BACK HOME, BUT IN YABULI, THIS IS A POPULAR WAY TO ENJOY SUPPER BEFORE HEADING OFF INTO THE FROZEN DARKNESS. THIS IS BARBECUED STEAK. MMM. DELICIOUS. MUCH LIKE IN JAPAN, HERE YOU CREATE YOUR OWN SPICE MIXTURE OF CHILI POWDER, GROUND PEANUTS, SESAME, AND CUMIN. NICE. GOOD STUFF. THIS IS BABY OF BUTTERFLY. WHAT TURNS TO A BUTTERFLY. RIGHT. LARVAE. WE'VE HEARD THEY TASTE DELICIOUS, AND THEY'RE POPULAR. OH, YEAH. THAT'S GOOD. MMM. SMOKY. THESE CARS ARE MOBILE, RIGHT? SO, IN THE DAYTIMES, NEAR THE CENTER OF THE CITY, PEOPLE MOVE THIS CAR. SO THEY CAN MOVE THE WHOLE BUSINESS RIGHT THERE. A VERY TINY LITTLE MOTORBIKE COULD TAKE THE WHOLE THING EASILY. NO WAY. A MOTORBIKE COULD MOVE THIS? MOTORBIKE. A FEW MORE SKEWERS, A FEW MORE BEERS, AND THEN IT'S BACK TO THE CITY TO GET READY FOR THE RUSSIANS. TRADITIONAL RUSSIAN PICKLES. TRADITIONAL RUSSIAN FISH. TRADITIONAL RUSSIAN SAUSAGE. DAY FOUR. BACK IN HARBIN, AND IT'S STILL FREAKING COLD. IMAGINE PRESSING YOUR FACE RIGHT UP AGAINST THE WALL OF A FREEZER AND KEEPING IT THERE. IN AN ATTEMPT TO REMEDY THE SITUATION, I'VE ARRANGED TO MEET UP WITH ALAN ACROSS TOWN. YES, ACTUALLY, I SAW THAT ON "NI HAO KAI-LAN," THE CARTOON. GRANDFATHER YEYE MADE THEM FOR KAI-LAN... AND HOHO THE MONKEY. THIS COULD BE ANY JOINT IN HARBIN, BUT DA SONG SHUI JIAO HAPPENS TO BE ONE OF ALAN'S FAVORITES. HERE IT'S ALL ABOUT THE DUMPLINGS. I LIKE THEM -- HOT AND SALTY, SAVORY, ACCOMPANIED BY LOCAL INDIGENOUS BEVERAGE. SO, YOU COME HERE ALL THE TIME? THIS IS A 24-HOUR OPERATION? I MEAN, THERE MUST BE THOUSANDS OF DUMPLING JOINTS IN HARBIN, RIGHT? SO WHY THIS ONE? AND THIS IS MOM'S? THIS IS ABSOLUTELY MOM'S. THESE CRUDE-LOOKING, UTILITARIAN PACKETS OF STEAMED MEAT AND VEGETABLES, JIAOZI, ARE FAMOUS ALL OVER CHINA -- A MUCH-LOVED SIGNATURE DISH OF DONGBEI. THIS IS A BEEF AND CARROT. [ PANTING ] [ LAUGHS ] THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH. IT'S STILL HOT. AH, PICKLED CABBAGE. MMM. YEAH. THAT'S DELICIOUS. WHICH DO YOU LIKE BEST? THESE ARE JUST DELICIOUS WITH THE PORK AND LEEK. YEAH. STRONG TASTE IN THERE. IT SEEMS LIKE A CHOKING HAZARD. OR, YOU KNOW, BREAK A CROWN. EXACTLY. "I SURVIVED MOM'S ATTEMPT TO KILL ME." I'M FEELING A LITTLE BETTER ABOUT THE WORLD. YEAH? VICODIN AND DUMPLINGS -- REALLY, IT'S A GREAT COMBINATION. HARBIN IS STILL KNOWN AS THE MOST RUSSIAN CITY IN CHINA. OHH. OH, GOD! THE ARCHITECTURAL SPLENDOR SORT OF LOSES ITS CHARM WHEN YOU CAN'T FEEL YOUR EXTREMITIES. AFTER THE 1917 REVOLUTION, OVER 100,000 RUSSIANS CAME TO LIVE HERE IN EXILE. TIMES HAVE CHANGED. A HUNDRED YEARS AGO, THEY BUILT THIS CITY. NOW ONLY A HANDFUL REMAIN, LIKE DIMITRI. SO, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN HARBIN? ABOUT FIVE YEARS. AND YOU CAME OVER FROM? VLADIVOSTOK CITY. SO YOU CAME HERE FOR THE WEATHER. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. NOTE, BY THE WAY, HOW THIS GUY IS DRESSED IN 25-BELOW-ZERO TEMPERATURES. NOT EVEN GLOVES! THOUGH I GUESS COMPARED TO HIS HOME IN VLADIVOSTOK, THIS IS LIKE MIAMI. A LOT OF RUSSIANS CAME TO HARBIN TO BUILD THE CITY. IT WAS STARTED BY RUSSIANS. AND THEN THE RUSSIANS GO HOME! [ LAUGHS ] SOME OF THEM WILLINGLY, SOME OF THEM NOT WILLINGLY. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? WORKING AT THE RESTAURANT. RUSSIAN FOOD? YEAH, RUSSIAN FOOD. OH, MAN. ***? YEAH. OF COURSE. THOUGHT SO. I'M TOTALLY [BLEEP] ALL RIGHT. WELL, IS IT WARM? YEAH, IT'S VERY WARM. LET'S GO THERE. LET'S EAT AND DRINK. LET'S GO TO EAT AND DRINK! ALL RIGHT, MAN. [ LAUGHS ] WHAT IF I COULD RUN A CAR ON TOFU? TOFU? YOU'D BE IN TROUBLE. REALLY? WELL, YOU'RE IN THE OIL BUSINESS. YOU'RE NOT IN THE SOYBEAN BUSINESS RIGHT NOW. [ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] TOFU. [ LAUGHS ] ON TOFU. [ REGIONAL MUSIC PLAYS ] WHENEVER I'M LOOKING TO CONFUSE A TABLE FULL OF RUSSIANS WITH MY APOCALYPTIC TALES OF SOYBEAN FUTURES, I COME HERE, AROUND THE WORLD RESTAURANT -- THE PLACE TO GO IN HARBIN IF YOU'RE AN ENTERPRISING RUSSIAN BUSINESSMAN OR OTHERWISE INCLINED TO ENJOY NORTH-OF-THE-BORDER FOLKLORIC SINGING AND DANCING. [ SINGING IN NATIVE LANGUAGE ] IN THE KITCHEN, IT'S EXCLUSIVELY RUSSIAN CLASSIC CUISINE. BASICALLY, IT'S FILLER FOR THE SUICIDAL, INHUMAN AMOUNT OF *** ALMOST INEVITABLY COMING MY WAY. I'M JOINED BY DIMITRI, YULIA, AND HER HUSBAND, MR. FUN BOY HERE, VADIM, WHICH I THINK MEANS "LIFE OF THE PARTY" IN RUSSIAN. OH, SEE? THAT'S FAMILIAR TO ME. NICE MEAL. YEAH, THE TRADITIONAL RUSSIAN PICKLES, TRADITIONAL RUSSIAN FISH, AND TRADITIONAL RUSSIAN ***. [BLEEP] YEAH, OKAY. I'M AFRAID OF HAVING DINNER WITH RUSSIANS, HONESTLY. I-I'M TERRIFIED. THE *** -- IT KILLS ME. REALLY? [ MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY ] HOW DO YOU SAY NO? YOU CAN'T, CAN YOU? I'LL TRY, BUT TO BE RUSSIAN -- YOU DON'T SAY NO. NA ZDOROV'E. NA ZDOROV'E. SO, OKAY, AS RUSSIANS, WHAT DO YOU THINK? I MEAN, WHO WILL RULE THE WORLD IN 20 YEARS? CHINA. OKAY, SO YOU'RE AN HONEST MAN. ABOUT IT. RUSSIA. [ CHUCKLES ] NO? YOU DON'T HAVE ENOUGH OIL. YOU DON'T HAVE ENOUGH. YOU HAVE A LOT, BUT NOT ENOUGH. NOW THAT WE HAVE THAT STRAIGHT... ...TO THE FUTURE. TO THE FUTURE. WHOEVER IT IS. YEAH, WHOEVER IT IS, FOR THE FUTURE. IT'S YOUR TIME. I THINK, BY THE WAY, THAT VADIM HATES ME. MAYBE NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO TELL HIM THAT THE CHINESE WILL ALSO BE TAKING OVER THE CAVIAR INDUSTRY. OKAY, TONY, I WANT YOU TO TRY THE RUSSIAN CAVIAR. OH. DIDN'T SEE THAT. YEAH. LOVE THIS. AND WAY TOO EARLY, THE TOASTS BEGIN, AT WHICH POINT, ALL IS LOST. THERE'S NO GOING BACK, ONLY FORWARD TOWARDS THE APOCALYPSE. WE HAVE TO DRINK FOR THE PEACE. TO WORLD PEACE. YEAH. TO WORLD PEACE, YEAH. AND THE GREAT PATRIOTIC WAR WHEN AMERICA AND RUSSIA OVERCAME FASCISM. DA. NA ZDOROV'E. NA ZDOROV'E. FOR VLADIVOSTOK. WELL -- AH, TO NABOKOV. THE GREATEST OF ALL WRITERS, TO ME. LET US TOAST TO ROMANCE. TO ROMANCE, YEAH. YEAH, TO HEART. TO NOT JUST HEART AND ROMANCE, BUT FOOLISHNESS IN THE CAUSE OF LOVE -- FOOLISHNESS. ALL RIGHT. [ LAUGHTER ] THEN, ADRIFT ON A SEA OF NEUTRAL SPIRITS, THE MEAL ENDED WITH DANCING SAUSAGES -- AT LEAST I THINK THEY WERE DANCING. THIS FOOD'S PRETTY AWESOME. Vadim: IT'S RUSSIAN BARBECUE. YES. VERY GOOD. THIS IS [BLEEP] GOOD, MY FRIEND. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] Bourdain: "AT THE TIME OF HIS DEATH, "MR. BOURDAIN WAS FILMING A SNAP-IN FOR THE INTERNATIONAL VERSION OF THE SHOW." WHEN WE COME BACK, I'LL LET YOU IN ON A CLASSIC CHINESE CURE FOR THE HANGOVER. THE ONLY THING I WANT TO PUT IN MY MOUTH TODAY IS THE END OF THAT SHOTGUN. THERE'S A PARTY INSIDE MY SKULL, OR THERE WAS, AS THE INSIDE OF MY CRANIUM IS A FETID, BLOOD-AND-HAIR SMEARED LANDSCAPE OF GRAIN ALCOHOL AND BOX WINE, LIKE SONNY BARGER LEFT AN UPPER DECKER BEHIND MY EYEBALLS. SO NATURALLY, IT'S A "WAKE UP EARLY AND GO [BLEEP] FISHING" SCENE. AND I WISH I COULD EVER EVEN CONCEIVE OF BEING AS OPTIMISTIC, AND AS POSITIVE ABOUT ANYTHING EVER AGAIN AS JIHI, WHO TODAY BROUGHT ALONG HIS GIRLFRIEND, ELENA. HELLO! THE SONGHUA RIVER WAS THE SITE OF A RATHER NASTY BENZENE SPILL IN 2005, BUT ACCORDING TO OFFICIAL CHINESE REPORTS, IT'S NOW 100% SAFE, AND I BELIEVE ALL OFFICIAL CHINESE REPORTS, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY CONCERN THE HEALTH AND SAFETY OF MY FISH SUPPLY. [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] I'VE BEEN PRAYING ALL MORNING FOR GOD TO KILL ME. SOME TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE AND ANGRY WOODLAND CREATURE IS CLAWING AT THE BACK OF MY EYEBALLS. [ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] AN ICY DEATH SOUNDS KIND OF GOOD RIGHT NOW, ACTUALLY. REALLY? SURE ABOUT THAT? YEAH. OKAY. THAT'S A GUSHER. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. WITH ALL THE AMAZING FOOD IN CHINA I COULD BE EATING RIGHT NOW, WHY THE [BLEEP] AM I OUT HERE ICE FISHING ON A FROZEN RIVER? AHH. IT MAY APPEAR A STRANGE AND EVEN CAMPY ENTERPRISE, BUT LOOK PAST THAT. WHAT YOU'RE SEEING IS A MAN LIVING HIS DREAM. WHO ARE WE TO JUDGE? NOW WE WAIT. WHAT KIND OF FISH ARE WE TALKING ABOUT? OH. BUT WE HAVE A STUNT FISH IN A COOLER? YEAH. LET'S ROLL WITH MY LIFE AND HEALTH. FORTUNATELY, MY ABSOLUTELY CONSCIENCE-LESS PRODUCER, TOM VITALE, WHO GOT FIRED FROM "GERALDO" FOR FAKING BATTLEFIELD FOOTAGE IN HIS BACKYARD, HAS GOT A BLATANTLY OBVIOUS STUNT FISH READY TO GO. THIS TIME, HE'S ACTUALLY GOT A LIVE FISH, AS VIEWERS TENDED TO NOTICE WHEN WE DRAGGED STONE-DEAD, SEMI-COOKED FISH OUT OF THE SEA. [ LAUGHTER ] CUE THE STUNT FISH. I'M READY. READY FOR MOBY FREAKING ***. OH, OH. THERE'S SOMETHING. THERE'S SOMETHING THERE. OH, HERE HE COMES. OH, MY GOD. OH. OH, HEAVENS, OH. OH! THAT'S A BIG FISH. THAT IS. [ LAUGHS ] WELL DONE. LUNCH. EXCELLENT. GOOD WORK. BRILLIANT. NATURE'S BOUNTY. [ LAUGHS ] HE SEEMS CURIOUSLY LETHARGIC. FREEZING TO DEATH OUT ON THE ICE, WATCHING OUR STUNT FISH SLOWLY DYING, TRAPPED INSIDE SOMEONE ELSE'S FREEZING PSYCHODRAMA. BUT THIS STUFF, THE COOKING PART, THAT'S FOR REAL AT LEAST. AND THE SOONER, THE BETTER. MY FINGERS ARE LIKE POPSICLES AT THIS POINT. ONLY THING KEEPING ME HANGING ON IS JIHI'S BOUNDLESS ENTHUSIASM. CLEANING FISH IN A KITCHEN, REGULAR KITCHEN, COLD FISH IS LIKE TOTALLY HORRIFYING. OOF. MAN, YOUR HANDS -- HIS HANDS MUST BE KILLING HIM. REALLY? FORTUNATELY, AS OWNER OF LIKE A GAZILLION HOT-POT RESTAURANTS, JIHI KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING. IN ADDITION TO THE STUNT FISH, JIHI ALSO THOUGHT TO BRING ALONG RICE WINE, GARLIC, LEEKS, AND SOY SAUCE, WHICH HE EXPERTLY CRAFTS INTO A SIMPLE YET DELIGHTFUL FISH SOUP. HEY, LOOKING GOOD. SMELLS AMAZING, ACTUALLY. AHH. THAT'S GOOD. SOME MIGHT SAY LIFESAVING. MMM. VERY GOOD AND VERY WELCOME. THANK YOU FOR ALL THE WORK. FEELING GOOD. FEELING A LOT BETTER THAN I WAS HALF AN HOUR AGO. BRILLIANT. THAT SOUP MAY JUST SAVE MY LIFE. [ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] GOOD, HUH? THEN OH, NO. OH [BLEEP] NO. ME AND MR. *** ARE NOT FRIENDS THIS MORNING. MY THROAT CLOSES AT THE MERE SUGGESTION. A WHIFF OF THIS STUFF MAKES THE WORLD TILT SIDEWAYS. [ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] [ SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY ] MUST...CHOKE...DOWN. [ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] OH, OKAY. YEAH, LET THE PARTY BEGIN. [ DANCE MUSIC PLAYS ] THEN THERE WAS SUDDENLY DANCING, WHICH BY NOW IN JIHI WORLD MAKES PERFECT SENSE. ♪ YOU WANNA FLY HIGH, YOU CAN FLY WITH ME ♪ ♪ YOU WANNA FLY HIGH, YOU CAN FLY WITH ME ♪ HE BRINGS HIS OWN KARAOKE MACHINE EVERYWHERE. TAKE US TO THE BRIDGE, JIHI. [ MUSIC CONTINUES ] MEANWHILE, ON THE OUTSKIRTS OF TOWN, A CAVERNOUS SPACE BUZZES WITH THE PREPARATIONS FOR A GRAND FEAST FOR HUNDREDS UPON HUNDREDS. "SHA ZHU CAI" LITERALLY MEANS "KILL PIG CUISINE." TRADITIONALLY IN DONGBEI, WHEN IT COMES TIME TO SLAUGHTER THE FAMILY PIG, RELATIVES, FRIENDS, AND NEIGHBORS ARE INVITED TO ENJOY A FEAST MADE ENTIRELY FROM THE MOST HONORED GUEST -- FROM HEAD TO TAIL TO SKIN TO BLOOD AND BONE. FORTUNATELY, IN THE CHINA OF TODAY, EVERY DAY IS OCCASION ENOUGH FOR A PARTY. SO I DO WHAT ANY TV HOST IN MY POSITION WOULD DO AND INVITE ALAN, GRAHAM AND PATRICK FROM THE SKI SLOPES, DIMITRI AND JIHI AND ELENA TO JOIN ME FOR DINNER. [ LAUGHTER ] THIS IS LIKE A NEW YEAR'S FEAST, BUT THEY DO IT EVERY NIGHT HERE. YEAH. AND IF THAT DIDN'T WHET YOUR APPETITE FOR MORE, HOW ABOUT SOME OVERTLY HOMOEROTIC TOPLESS KUNG-FU DANCING? DON'T TOUCH THAT DIAL. ...travelchannel.com. LOOK. IT'S A BIG ONE. I WAS GONNA SAY THAT AFTER A WEEK IN DONGBEI, I WAS GETTING USED TO THE COLD, BUT THAT'S NOT TRUE. I'LL NEVER GET USED TO IT. BUT I'LL MISS MY NEW FRIENDS, SO I INVITED THEM ALL TO JOIN ME FOR THE KIND OF INSANO CHINESE BANQUET SO POPULAR HERE -- A CUSTOM AND A STYLE I'VE GROWN ALL TOO USED TO OVER THE YEARS. [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] CHEERS. THIS IS A PARTICULARLY HARBIN-STYLE TAKE ON THE PRACTICE, BY THE WAY, AND THIS PLACE -- ONE OF THE BEST -- IS CALLED OLD LIU'S KILL PIG CUISINE. TELL ME ABOUT THE PORKY OVER HERE. NO. WAIT A MINUTE. THE GIRL IS BONING GIRLS? YEAH. BUT HE DOES THEM ALL? [ LAUGHTER ] LIVE ENTERTAINMENT. A RESTAURANT BANQUET HALL WITH ROOM FOR HUNDREDS AND HUNDREDS, AND PIG -- HEADFIRST, APPROPRIATELY ENOUGH. MMM. IT'S SHOCKING THAT WHAT'S USUALLY THE RUBBERY, TOUGHEST PART IS NOT. IT WAS INCREDIBLE. REALLY TENDER. [ MAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] THERE WERE PIGS FEET -- MUNJU XIAO. THAT'S DELICIOUS. GOOD. THAT'S NICE. CHAJU GHAN, WHICH IS LIVER, I THINK. WOW. IT'S BEAUTIFULLY COOKED. WHAT IS THIS, ANYWAY? IT LOOKS GOOD. A TOWER OF SHREDDED PIG LUNGS -- BAN DU SIT. DELICIOUS. YU FE CHANG, WHICH IS, I THINK, STIR-FRIED CHITLINS. OH, YEAH. MMM. WOW, THAT'S PRETTY. PORK BELLY WITH CABBAGE -- THAT'S WAN SI SWAN BI OR SOMETHING LIKE IT. THAT'S REALLY GOOD. YEAH, YEAH. I'M ALL OVER THAT, MAN. AND EVEN SOME VEGETABLES, FOR COLOR, I THINK. [ SNORTING ] AH. SHANK. SHANK. SHANK. PORK MARROW? WHY, YES. WHAT A GOOD IDEA. THE STRAW FOR THE MARROW, RIGHT? OH, WOW! THEY'RE NOT KIDDING. WOW! GET RIGHT IN THERE. [ SLURPS ] OH. GOOD? GOOD? [ SLURPS ] HEY, ALAN, WHAT'S THIS, MAN? VERY NICE. PORK? PORK FLOWER. [ LAUGHS ] OH, IF ONLY. IF ONLY I COULD GROW PORK IN MY GARDEN, I WOULD BE A HAPPY MAN. GAN BEI. CHEERS. THE INESCAPABLE ROUNDELAY OF DRINKS AND TOASTS BEGINS AGAIN. GAN BEI. THE NEVER-ENDING MERRY-GO-ROUND OF BOOZING AND EATING ACCOMPANIED BY THE COMEDY STYLINGS OF TONIGHT'S EMCEE. [ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] A FEW MORE DRINKS AND I THINK I'LL ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND HIS JOKES. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] THIS MAN KNOWS HOW TO LIVE. WHAT IS HIS SECRET TO HAPPINESS AND SUCCESS? BUT, I MEAN, A MENTAL ATTITUDE. IS THERE A PARTICULAR MENTAL ATTITUDE? [ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ] AH. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THIS? GUY WE USED TO WORK WITH HAD THIS GREAT MOTTO -- "I WANT TO DIE YOUNG AS LATE AS POSSIBLE." SEE, I-I-I THINK IT'S WHEN YOU DON'T GIVE A [BLEEP] THAT YOU WIN. I'LL WALK AWAY RATHER THAN DO BUSINESS WITH AN [BLEEP] BECAUSE IT'S NOT FUN. SO HOW IMPORTANT IS FUN? I'M ASKING THE WRONG -- IS FUN IMPORTANT, EVEN TO RUSSIANS? EVEN TO RUSSIANS. [ LAUGHTER ] HOW IMPORTANT IS FUN? SPEAKING OF WHICH... AH, THANK YOU. I GOT THIS. GOOD HEALTH, GOOD FOOD, GOOD FRIENDSHIP. GAN BEI. GAN BEI! IF AND WHEN CHINA DOES TAKE OVER THE WORLD, AT LEAST IT WILL BE FUN. BYE! BYE-BYE! BYE-BYE!