Billy Connolly telling celtic fans to get a grip

Daughter saying Don't dance with my dad he's a real prick You dance like a big medical student Ice dancing is *** they make no secret of it thats why is isn't a sport The womans up like this the guys sliding along Womans she's He's saying "will you give us a shout when we get near that wall here" He doesn't want to lose her Away out the door and up the street oh *** beep beep oh *** sorry Crowds are on their feet "easy easy" He's lowering her down like this We know we know what he means we can see him There on their feet do itx4 Just cant wait for him to go This is a.... Its a good jersey for sneaking around nobodys noticed you Is it a cardie? is it a twinset? is it a cardie? I love twinsets I'll have a wee twinset Swingbacks and a twinset So this is about ice dancing hes got the woman up like this right? lowering her down now this, this is a *** position, this *** maneuver, is known as *** *** Its a good one to remember if your ever playing scrabble with the parish priest That'll *** him up for a few months *** and you can have *** on the way down But in glasgow its not known as ***, in glasgow its known as growling at the badger A much better title Have you growled at the badger son? what? where do you think I take her the *** zoo or something? So he's just about to growl at the badger audience are on their feet, their losing the place, throwing bouquets or flowers onto the ice oh yes fabulous I was doing this in Glasgow and I forget the word bouquet couldn't find it so I said I said polythene bags of flowers The last of the red hot romantics Hello its the wife's birthday flowers in a polythene bag would be nice A wee poke(bag) of flowers So he's just about to growl at the badger the people are on their feet, bouquets of flowers and polythene bags have been thrown on from the people who don't know about bouquets In a sudden change of direction ooooh they say in a most expectant way ooooh You know that wonderful noise when somebody just misses the goal at Hampden by the eighth of an inch and a 100,000 people go ooooh or nowadays 7000 people go ooooh Oh I meant to tell you Be quiet you'll hear nothing if you make a noise in here Danny Kyle, he's my friend lives in Paisley, a comedian he's a St Mirren supporter and apparantly thats incurable But I was doing that thing about the fishnets and the suspenders, the poor guy who was found dead like that He says do you know actually he wasn't found dead in suspenders, he was found dead in a celtic jersey but his friends changed him into fishnets and suspenders incase his family would be embarrassed so....aw boo yourself Booo *** off can't take a joke *** off I get the *** way Now (whistles the sash) *** off all of you Give it laldie passing the chapel lads Can't take a joke your *** doomed thou shalt not, we *** shall So Orangemen walk backwards before they walk forwards you ever notice that (sash) They also play the accordian vertically So the badger growling His sudden change of direction ooooh the crowd see he's moving oooh they get the drift now woooo oh easy easy The face is coming down here their sliding backwards he's got her by the ears now yaheyhey Her legs are stretched away out swishing about on the ice She's going hurry up for *** sake hurry up for *** sake my knickers are full of slush here The crotch is down to there like that I think I hurt myself there See people have noticed this about me See now, this religion stuff get it out your system It doesn't mean a *** thing It's all *** and wind It's all designed to frighten you There's people who believe in angels There's people who believe people are flying in the sky telling God that your *** they need professional *** help Right they can stick up for themselves *** them now It's the truth it's the *** truth we shall Yes father I think I shall tonight ohh quick get in that confessional now You see because religion is under strain just now because of the nippin about they've been doing and have you noticed celibacys getting the blame, aye it's because of celibacy, celibacys a bad thing