The O.C S2E5 - English Transcript

Listen, I just want to tell you I don't want to talk. Okay, I'm fine with this. Zack, will you wait, please? Beat it. Ducky! I'd really like to try and be something. - I didn't marry you for money. - You married me because you were pregnant. I married you because I loved you. If my dad is acting all weird, he's hiding something. - Are you having an affair? - We're in much deeper water than that. You think I'm cute. When I asked you out that day for Seth, I wanted it to be me. - You are an idiot. - An idiot you'd go out with sometime? It's possible. So Alex and I kissed And you spent the whole night on the bus stop talking to Lindsay. - I know. Somehowthe double date worked out. - I'm proud of you. So what's next for you two lovebirds? Maybe chatting at the train station? Whispering sweet nothings at the airport? Ryan, I'm working off the bus stop motif, bro. Yeah, I got it. I don't know what's next. I'm just going to take things slow, no pressure. - Yeah? - Yeah. What about asking her to the big dance? Oh, no, the winter dance. Yeah, do it, man. I'm going to take Alex. So take Lindsay. We can have the double date that we were supposed to have. Ah, it just seems a little soon. I mean, what if she's had the weekend to think about it, and just decides we should be lab partners? All we did was talk. Ryan Atwood are you scared of a girl? No, I just I might like her and I don't know, every time there's a big party to go to - Something goes terribly awry? - Yeah. Yeah, but usually to you. Maybe this is my year to shoulder that part. - You're not really the fist-fighting type. - Well, you're not really the type to be scared of a girl. Just ask her to the dance. It's the only way to know how she feels. Maybe I'll just go alone. Coop, you cannot go alone. Why not? It's just a school dance. It is not just a school dance. It is the "Sno. C. " The one night where winter comes to Newport Beach. And your first dance of the year as social chair. - What happened to DJ? - Oh, I didn't ask him. My mom's chairing the host committee. She'd freak. - Your mom doesn't like him? - She doesn't know about him. It's not his type of thing anyway. Hi. Hey, guys, you still haven't bought your Sno. C. tickets yet, so can I put you down for four? - Yeah, I don't know about that. - Ah, you should take the Mrs. Why, Cohen, you should invite the girl from Saturday night. Yeah Oh, I forgot. She totally pulled a Houdini on your ***. Oh, right. You must be talking about Lindsay, not Alex, the one I made out with. Oh, sorry. Alex, my mistake. And here I'm feeling sorry for the wrong girl. I should probably get to class. You know, you just really should make sure she wears comfortable shoes, so she doesn't twist her ankle when she's running away. Yeah? L- Like him? Zach! Wait. That worked out rather nicely. Caleb, it's me. I still haven't heard back from you about setting up another meeting with Renee Wheelerand her attorney. So, do me a favor and call me back, will you? How about some eggs? You okay? How about an omelet? I know I'm not supposed to ask about the case Honey, even if I could talk about it, I'd have nothing to tell you. Dad's still not talking. What could he possibly have done that he would rather go to jail than admit to? Unless Life with Julie Cooper is tougher than we thought. - What are you going to do? - The only thing I can do. Ask for a continuance buy some time and find out what he's hiding. Hey how you doing? Hey, uh, good. I'm, I'm good. Um I thought about what you said all weekend, and you were so sweet and so honest. I'm glad, 'cause, um, there's this dance. Actually. . I don't think so. I mean, I would love to go out with you, but we're lab parters, and can you imagine how awkward it's gonna be if we break up? We haven't even gone out yet. And it's already awkward. Let's face it, relationships almost always end badly. And this way, we can be friends for the rest of our lives. - So, you just want to be friends? - I think we should be. - Hello? - Hey, is now a bad time? - Well, where are you? - I'm in the parking lot. You think you can get away for lunch? I really like our lunch breaks. So what's this Sno. C. ? It's just this dance. We never get snow here, so we kind of have to make it ourselves. Mm, sounds like fun. Actually, it's very Harbor. - You'd probably hate it. - I guess it's a good thing that no one's asked me, then. I would've; it's just I'm kind of running it, so I figured You don't want to be distracted by having to I don't know finally introduce me to your friends? I'm sorry. But I figured I'd be so busy, I'd be a bad date. If you It's cool. I'd rather be alone with you anyway. Well, we could go out afterward. Or we could just stay in. Marissa? Oh, my God. The yard guy? Mom - What are you doing home from school? - I'm on my lunch break. And now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back. - I've got to get to work. - No, you don't. You're fired. - And you, young lady, are grounded. - Like that's going to keep me from seeing him. Come on, DJ. You stay away from my daughter, you hear me? - Oh, thanks, Michelle. - Did my dad call? - ?????. - Hey. Hey. How'd it go with the judge? Well, not only was my motion fora continuance denied, but the trial's now been fast-tracked. We've got less than two weeks. I'm calling Caleb again. - How could I have not seen this coming? - Honey, come on, how could you have? Your call has been forwarded to an I've been working with him side by side all this time. How could I have not known that he was bribing this woman from the city council? - If that is what he was doing. - What did she say at her deposition? Nothing. Her lawyer wouldn't let her answer any of my questions. - You can't talk to her without a lawyer. - Well I could - That would be unethical. - Yeah, strictly speaking. But desperate times I'm just saying, if I happen to run into the woman. I don't want you getting yourself in trouble over this. Aw, honey it's a little late for that. Hey, Ryan. - You know where I can buy my Sno. C. tickets? - I can't say I do. - You're not going? - Uh, no. - No one to go with? - I had someone to go with. She just didn't want to go with me. - You going with someone? - Definitely. It's a given, right? - Except, of course, for Cohen? - I don't think he's asking Summer. I don't think he has to. I mean, even if he doesn't ask her, somehow, the night's going to end up about them. Yeah, I get that. Believe me. But, uh, I think it's really over. - I mean, Seth's got a new girl now. - Really. - So he's over Summer? - Oh, yeah, definitely. I think so. He wants to be. Oh, hello, Alex. How are we today? Here, finally. Can you carry these to the storeroom? The storeroom, sure. Maybe you'd like to show me where it is? All right, Cohen, we need to work. Okay, by work,you mean ( clearing throat ) make out? No. By work, I mean work. All right, no romance in the workplace. That's fine. I can respect that. But in that case, Harbor School's annual Sno. C. Ball is coming up. What do you say? A little dancing, a little faux snow? Obviously you got the wrong idea Saturday night, because you and me it's not happening. Okay. Okay, except you did kind of kiss me. Uh-huh. It was fun. It was fun? It didn't mean anything to you? - Dude, it was just a kiss. - Okay, then why didn't you just shake hands? Thanks, Homer. See you Thursday. Thank you. - You just kissed the beer guy. - So? It is just a kiss. Right, Mandy? Right. So, Saturday night was fun, but that's all. Those sodas aren't going to carry themselves to the store room. Do you think it's offensive to say that, like, all women are crazy? Probably to women. It makes no sense, man, Alex kisses me, then she turns right around and she kisses Homer. - Who's Homer? - The beer guy. And he's not a looker either. - And then after that, she turns right around and kisses Mandy. - Mandy's a girl? No, I couldn't even enjoy it, so consumed was I with how crazy women are. Ugh. Believe me, I know. I spent all night at a bus stop talking to Lindsay, everything's great. - Next thing I know, she dumps me before we even go out. - Crazy - I know. - I know. I'm telling you, man, women are so freaking crazy, I wouldn't be surprised if next time we see them, Alex is dragging me to the store room and Lindsay's asking you to the dance. I don't think so. Which part, you and Lindsay or me and Alex getting it on? Hey! Hey. How are you? You need a hand with something? - Sure. - All right. Ryan, be a gentleman. - I've got class. - What do you need me to grab? - Um, in my car is a penguin. - A penguin? Be careful. - Uh, don't worry, I'm fine. - It's the penguin I'm worried about. - He's very expensive. - Oh, is he? Well Ryan, please, no, don't. - The penguin likes Marissa! - That's not funny! Stop. Seriously. It's not too late. You can still ask him to the Sno. C. You have no idea how hard it is The boy loves to dance. - He's going to think I'm crazy. - He knows you're a girl. He expects it. I have your tickets for the dance. And no arguements, okay? Because it's for charity. If I buy the thing, do I have to go? I'm kind of dateless at the moment. - me, too. - What about you and DJ? I thought you guys were We're hanging out, but It's a school dance and I think he'd feel weird about it. - Hey, it's my school and I feel weird about it. - Yeah, me, too, and I'm the one throwing the thing. - I guess you can't not go, huh? - I wish. Both of my parents are hosting Hey, you know what? Why don't we go together? As friends, of course. But, at least that way, we wouldn't have to be alone. - That's true. - Great, so 7:00 is good? Hello, Summer. You look lovely today. Are those Manolos? What do you need, Cohen? Well, I need help. No argument here. See, it turns out Ryan's good for some things. Comic books, bench-pressing, engine repair, but sometimes - A more feminine point of view is required. - You're asking me for girl advice? I know it's really weird, because you know, you and I are not, anymore. The thing is, Summer, truthfully, you're the only person in my life that I You're right, this is really weird and bad. I'm sorry. - No, it's - It's really, it's cool. It's okay. I'm listening. - Really? - Kind of. Okay. All right, so you remember that girl from Saturday, right? The one that I - You made out with and were rubbing my nose in it. - So I thought, you know, she likes me, right? - So I asked her to the dance. - She said no. - Right. And then she kissed two people right in front of me. - Damn, she's good. At what? Besides kissing, though. Well, she's playing you hot and cold, and so far, Cohen, you've just been hot. Not that kind of hot. You need to cool down, Cohen. You've got to go like Iceman on her *** and see how she likes it. - Was that your first X-Men reference? - Top Gun. That's one of the greatest love stories of our time. Ms. Wheeler! Sandy Cohen. Caleb's attorney. - Mr. Cohen, you know I can't speak to you without my attorney present. - With all due respect, you didn't say a word to me when I had nothing to say. - I'm not the one on trial here. - Then why'd the DA indict you, too? Ask my lawyer. You're going to be hearing from him as well as the Bar Association. Good-bye, Mr. Cohen. You're hiding something, Ms. Wheeler? We both know it. - Look, whatever is going on between you and Caleb - There is nothing going on between me and Caleb. Oh, okay, well, there was. Wasn't there? So you had an affair, so what? It's over. Why not come forward? Why risk both of you going to jail over, over nothing? I have to go. I'll see you in court. So, I've been thinking and well Yes. I would love to go to the dance with you. - You would? - Yes. I'm kind of going with someone else now. - With Marissa? - Yeah. - God of course. - But only because you said No, no, I know. I was right the first time. Really, I don't I don't even like dances, so Have fun. Hey. I missed you at lunch. Yeah, I was in the library. I had to finish a history paper. Oh, library, God, how can you work in there? - It is, like, so quiet. - Look, I've got world lit so I got to go. Well, hey, um, I was thinking, maybe before the dance, we could, like, go get Yeah, about that. Um, it turns out I'm not going to be able to go. - I've got family stuff. Sorry. - Unless you're, like, grieving over the death of a family pet, we're going to the Sno. C Why don't you just ask Cohen? I'm sure he'd love to take you. Hey, great, you're here! The floors need sweeping and mopping, and I know how much you love cleaning the bathrooms, so I saved them for you. - But you can start with clearing those empties. - Great, I'll get right on it. Not very chatty today, are ya? I don't know, is there something you wanted to talk about? - No. Not really. - All right. You know what? There is something that I think we should discuss. Here's the thing. First of all, I love working here. I do. But right now, for me, with school and homework, and this dance coming up, I don't know that I have time for a job. - You're quitting? - Yeah. Because I wouldn't make out with you in the storeroom? What? No, just, come on. Listen, I asked you to a dance. You said no. I respect that, okay? I do. I just for me, I have just a lot of obligations right now outside of the Bait Shop, so You know. Um, this is what I owe you for the week, so Okay, yeah, well, you know, looks like it's all there. It's been really great working with you. With you. I mean, you've been lovely, so See ya. Take care. It is your lawyer leaving you another message Call me back, will you? I've had a breakthrough. - You okay? - Yeah, sure. Are the boys still here? We should get some pictures before they head out to the big dance. Come on, buddy, get off your ***. Come to the party. Thank you, Ryan, but I'd like to just sit here and watch my kung fu movie if you don't mind. Well, Marissa and I are only going as friends, we can all go together. That is how lame I've become. I can't even be third wheel to an actual relationship. Look at you. Oh, you look sharp. So you taking that girl that Seth was telling me about? - No, it didn't really work out. - Seth, why aren't you dressed? - You're going to be late for the party. - Not the Seth Cohen pity party. Could you guys maybe take this discussion elsewhere? Samuel Hong's about to face off with his arch nemesis. It's kind of a big deal. You know, I kind of feel like kicking back to the good movie Me, too. What are we watching? Masters of Martial Art. - Masters of Martial Art? - Yes. I hear this is wonderful. Why is that ninja smoking a cigarette? Honey, I don't actually think that's a ninja. Ninjas usually wear capes, right? Oh, so a ninja's like a super hero. Mom, Dad, you two enjoy. Ryan, give me five minutes. Where you going? Come on back! Nice work. Never underestimate a parent's ability to mortify his child. So, no Sno. C. for DJ? With my mom and dad hosting? He'll just pick me up after. Then maybe Zach will show, and we can all go out. I don't care if Zach shows. In fact, honestly, I would rather go by myself. Oh, really? - You would? - No. Good, 'cause you're going with me and Ryan. Great, now I'm going to be dragged along like the homely cousin from Iowa. Well, you know, at least I won't have to deal with Cohen knowing that I'm going alone. Oh God. Hello, Summer. Where's Zach? So, just like old times, huh? Seriously, man, four people and not one of us could get a real date. I guess we're going to win the awards for biggest losers in Newport Beach. You must win that award a lot. I'm sorry. Is Zach in here? Is he hiding somewhere? Zach? Zachary? At least he didn't kiss two people right in front of me. - Who did that? - Seth's girlfriend. Oh! I'm sorry, that's right. She dumped you! She kissed two guys right in front of you? I think it was a guy and a girl. - What?! - Thanks for that, buddy. Wait, she kissed another girl? You did not tell me that! I A gentleman never tells when his girl kisses a girl and a guy. It does kind of feel like old times. Oh, my God, Coop! Is it okay? Okay? It's beautiful. I can't believe you did all this. It reminds me of when Mr. Freeze attacked the Gotham Society Ball, which is a compliment. Well, I'm just glad people showed up and they're actually dancing. - Yeah, wanna? - Dance? Sure. Why not? I'll see you later. Don't even think about it. - How bad do you wish DJ were here right now? - It's okay. Just, if it's not too weird, don't stand so far away. It looks like we're in the fifth grade. Jimmy, look! She looks beautiful. Yes, but more importantly, she's with Ryan, who right now, let's face it, looks like Prince Charming. - So you're happy? - Oh, so happy. Thank you for coming. - Dad. Sandy didn't tell me you were coming over. - He said he had something that could save my hide. - Clearly, he didn't share it with you. - No, he actually respects things like attorney-client privilege. - Yeah, I said call me, not come over. - I was in the neighborhood. So, what've you got? What is this miraculous development? I spoke with Renee Wheeler today. I know about the affair. - What? - Relax. She didn't give you up. - Why didn't you tell me? - Because the details of my personal life have no bearing on this case. Oh, yes they do. The D. A. thinks you've been paying off Renee Wheeler to get building permits. The D. A. 's an idiot. Even if you were having an affair with this woman to be paying someone palimony. Unless there was a child. - That is the most preposterous - Was there a child? We were together just a few months. Renee came to me, said she was pregnant. I set up a trust. It was a long time ago, Sandy. I made a mistake. Well, when you make a mistake you really make a mistake. First thing Monday morning, you and Renee are going to go the judge and tell him everything. I can't do that. - You're both looking at jail time. - I'm sorry, Sandy, I can't. Hey, this is KHHS, the Harbor School Radio Station coming to you live from the Sno. C. Winter Dance, and this is song for all you lonely hearts out there. Fine. But no talking. Ryan? - You look so handsome. - Thanks. I know that you and I have had our differences in the past, but now with you and Marissa are back together Actually, we're With you gone this summer, she got a little bit out of control. But with the both of us looking out for her Hi, sweetie. We were just talking about you. Well, we don't want to keep you from your hosting duties. - She told you you were handsome? - Yeah. A year ago she wanted to have me committed 'cause I was dating you. Now, somehow, you've managed to find someone she hates even more. I know. Can you imagine what she would have done if I'd brought DJ? Kind of. Which is why I'm surprised you didn't. You usually don't pass upa chance to ruin your mom's night. Yeah, but why put DJ through that? I just told him to come after. So, it's not because you're embarrassed? I already told you, the winter ball, it's not his type of thing. Did he decide that or did you? I figure we're probably the same size. Thanks. You sure you're going to be okay? Yeah. Actually, there's something I have to do. Can I talk yet? I just was curious, why Zach isn't here. Because he was jealous, I guess. He was jealous? Of what? Of, uh, my good looks and charm? Of my modesty? - Of your big mouth. He saw us talking. - When? In the hallway, in the lounge. Before, during and after school. I mean, we were just talking. - Hey, guys. - Zach, you came! Yeah. I thought you might still need a date. - Stupid, huh? - Zach, it's really not like that. Yeah, it is. I- I get it. You guys are just one of those couples even when you're not being a couple, you'll always be a couple. You're Joanie and Chachie. Luke and Leia. Luke and Leia were brother and sister. Yeah, well, may the force be with you. I was just in the neighborhood. it-it's Freud. I have slippers with Freud on them. They're my Freudian slippers. - What are you doing here? - I just wanted to tell you that I should have gone to the dance with you. I wanted to go with you. - That's why you're here? - And I was hoping we could, you know, do something, hang out. - I'm sorry. - Okay. What about tomorrow night? - Ryan, this isn't going to work. - Why not? - Because, you're you're you. - Wh-What does that mean? I mean, you're this tough kid from Chino who lives in some rich family's pool house, with an ex-girlfriend who's maybe the most intimidatingly beautiful girl in the history of high school. Yeah, but right now I'm here with you. I mean, I will see you at school, in the hallway, in class and I'm not giving up 'cause I like you. Who knows why. I think that if you got to know me, you'd like me, too. Good night. Hello, Renee. - Thank you for agreeing to meet me here. - What's this all about, Caleb? - I understand you had a run-in with my son-in-law. - He came to see me, but I didn't say anything. I know and I appreciate that. This must be tough on you. We just have to get through the next couple of weeks. And then what? Then you go to jail? - Are you really willing to do that to protect the secret? - It's not the secret I'm trying to protect, it's my family. - This would devastate my daughter. - And what about mine? Ours. I could arrange for you both to leave the country. Not permanently, just until this blows over. What are you going to do? I don't know anymore. - Pretty quiet around here, huh? - Yeah, all the kiddies are at their various winter dances. Yoo-Hoo please. One. - You were at the Killer show here, right? - I go to a lot of shows here, as I work here. - No, yeah, you were here with Ryan. - Um, yeah, at the time. Why, you go to Harbor? Why aren't you at the Sno. C. Winter Wake-Off? It's complicated. Or not. The girl I like is in love with another guy and probably always will be. And right now, your girl is at the dance with the other guy? And you're here. Well, if she didn'tlove you before,then this display of courage and dedication should definitely do the trick. I'm sensing a low level of sarcasm here. What am I supposed to do? - Be a man. Put down your chocolate soda and fight for her. - I'm not really much of a fighter. I know I look big, but it's just, I have broad shoulders. No, what I mean is that she can't fall for you if you're not there to catch her. You're right. At least threaten to fight for her. And even if it turned into an actual fight, I could take Seth Cohen. Thanks. Did he just say Seth Cohen? That's our gardener. Oh, my God. - Oh, no, you don't. - Jimmy! - No, come on. - Let go. - You're coming with me. - Jimmy, I have to What, embarrass Marissa? Don't you remember when we were kids? No one could keep us apart. First of all, it is not the same thing. Second of all, am I the gardener in this scenario? I think not. My parents threatened to cut me off if I didn't break up with you. You never told me that. - I didn't want to hurt your feelings. - What did you tell them? I told them to go to hell. I told them I was in love with you. I was. Well, I was easy to love back then. I was beautiful and much nicer. Jules, come on, you're still beautiful. And we both know you were never nice. We said that we were going to stay away from each other. Except Ryan left with the car. Well, I have to wait for DJ and Marissa to finish making out, so - So it looks like we've done really well for ourselves. - Oh, yeah, very impressive. - Yeah, nice going. - Right back at ya. Zach! Hey, man, you came back. Listen, now Oh, my God! Oh, my God. - Oh, my goodness. - You hit him? I know I don't know what happened. I never hit anybody before. You'd never know it. - I'm, I'm so sorry. - I probably deserved it. Seth? Alex? Alex? Alex. - What are you doing here? - I felt responsible for you. I can take it from here. Yeah, I, uh I guess you can. - Come on, Zach. See you guys. - Sorry, Cohen. Come on. We have a first aid kit back at the club. - The storeroom, perhaps? - Do you want to get hit again? - Here. - Thanks. Look, I'm really sorry. It's just every time I turn around, it's you and Cohen. I know. I'm sorry. But he's not my boyfriend. He's not. He's just He's Cohen. So what am I? Well, you were my boyfriend. Until you decided not to take me to the dance. So, can I ask you a question? Will you go to the dance with me? Hmm let me think about it. - You sure you're okay? - I'm fine. It's just a shame you got there when you did, 'cause I was about ready to, you know, bring the hurt. - Really. - Yeah, yeah, you bet. - I'd like to see that. - Yeah? A little bit of a little bit of that? Oh, no. What are those? These? These are fists, okay? Or, as I like to call them, the twin ambassadors of pain. - Come here. Stand up. - You're touching the twin ambassadors. Hold them like. . . like this. - Okay. What are you doing? - I'm teaching you to defend yourself. - What, against who? You? - Quite possibly. This is really fun, thanks. All right, all right. Okay. - Defend yourself. - I don't know how. I'm sorry. My eye, I think you just scratched my cornea. - I can't see. - No! No way, no. - It's blurry. - Put your hands down. Let me see. It's blurry. - What are you talking about? It's fine. - Then why does it hurt? There. Is that better? A little. A little bit. Did I get you anywhere else? You kind of nicked me right there a little bit, I think. Yeah, I don't know. It hurts. Come in. After you left, I tried to read and I do this thing where I put a red dot at the bottom of the page to see how efficiently I'm reading. And sometimes I have to read a page two or three times, so there will be two or three red dots. Um, well, after you left, I made 11 red dots at the bottom of the page. - Eleven. - Lindsay I'm talking too much, as usual. I'm sorry. I just, I get nervous and I start talking and then nothing can shut me up. Except that, I guess. I know something we can do that doesn't involve a lot of talking. All right, throw it again. - Throw it! Throw it! - Wait, wait. - Wait, what happened to my head? - It rolled under the truck. - What? - It's not good. - So this is hanging out, huh? - Yeah. - Ms. Wheeler! - Sorry to come by so late. Who is it Sandy? Is everything okay? I'm Kirsten Cohen. Renee Wheeler. Hi. Renee is a witness in your father's case. Let's go out back where we can talk. We won't be long. I shouldn't be talking to you. If anyone finds out They won't. You have my word. I just need to know what has Caleb told you. I know everything. Without any help from Caleb. Which is why I need you. If you were to come forward to the judge with the right documentation, the D. A. would drop the charges, case would go away. Mom! What are you doing here?