Old Time McCain and Dole - Lyrics - Capitol Steps

The Capitol Steps are an American political satire group. The group has been performing since 1981, and has released approximately thirty albums consisting primarily of song parodies. Originally consisting exclusively of congressional staffers performing around Washington, D.C., the troupe now primarily employs professional actors and singers. The Capitol Steps have performed on PBS, public radio and in various small- and medium-sized venues around the United States.

John McCain: My friends, it's obvious that the Republican Party is not happy with the current field of Presidential candidates, so I've been going door to door and asking people this one simple question: 'Do I live here?' It's also clear that most people don't want Mitt Romney, so I have decided to throw my hat in the ring, and this time I am going to win, because this time I will not pick a vice president with a lack of experience or a pregnant daughter. So please welcome my running mate, Bob Dole! There he is, yep. Dole: Well, a lot of people say Bob Dole is too old to run for Vice President. They say that Bob Dole's memory is not what it used to be. They say that Bob Dole's memory is not what it used to be. Sure, I used to have a hearing problem, but now that I have this new hearing aid my hearing is better than ever. McCain: What time is it? Dole: Oh, about 8:30. McCain: Just leave those fresh faces on the shelf Dole: You want experience in two-ought-twelve McCain: And two past candidates have broken the mold Both: McCain and old time Robert Dole McCain: I served America in Vietnam Dole: I look as though I might have been embalmed McCain: If you're annoyed by guys with bladder control Both: You'll like this old time Robert Dole Dole: We don't waste any time with Facebook now McCain: Don't tweet out underwear, we don't know how Dole: Can't figure out my new remote control Both: McCain and old time Robert Dole McCain: I know we'll win it in all 13 states Dole: I need *** just to stand up straight McCain: Who won't believe that there's an ozone hole Both: McCain and old time Robert Dole McCain: Call us old relics, call us what you will Dole: But when they're fighting up at Capitol Hill McCain: Who's not afraid to yell Dole: "Shut your pie hole" Both: McCain and old time Robert Dole McCain: His inexperience we're gonna mock Dole: 'Cause we got underwear Both: Old as Barack!