Been in Germany too long?

If you’ve been in Germany as long as I have, you might start to wonder whether or not you’ve maybe outstayed your welcome. Well, if so, I’ve compiled a list: ten ways that you can tell that you’ve been in Germany for too long. You start to realize that having special spoons for soup and boiled eggs is not really necessary. You begin to expect things to just work. You don’t quite know just how to react when you encounter a friendly shop assistant. You go to parties where the government’s initiative to raise standards in hospitals is an acceptable topic of conversation. You have long ago stopped laughing at this. You can’t remember the last time you were offered a cup of tea, but it was almost certainly when you were laid up in bed with the flu. You begin to think that “circulatory disturbance” is a real medical condition. You find yourself filling out a form in order to obtain a form, and see nothing unusual in that. You consider it a major scandal when a politician sends a Christmas card to a wealthy businessman. And finally: You’re able to keep a straight face when you’re being introduced to Herr Professor Doktor Doktor Furtwangler-Schmidt.