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SIR THOMAS (right): My dear Livingston,
LIVINGSTON (left): Oh yes! I'm holding it right here in fact!
SIR THOMAS: Oh my God I just noticed!
Did you see that article about that poem by that fellow
LIVINGSTON: William Carlos Williams!
SIR THOMAS: William Carlos Williams?
You don't say!
My, my what an amazing poet.
And what was that amazing poem he wrote about that amazing Red Wheelbarrow?
Such an intriguing and virtuous tale?
LIVINGSTON: 'so much depends upon a red wheelbarrow'
SIR THOMAS: 'glazed with rainwater'
LIVINGSTON: 'beside the white chickens.'
SIR THOMAS: What a jolly good cup of tea!
LIVINGSTON: Oh yes! SIR THOMAS: Oh the poem, back to the poem now.
SIR THOMAS: What a meaningful and intriguing piece. LIVINGSTON: Oh yes, Sir Thomas, of course!
SIR THOMAS: A marvelous instilling of joy and beauty into the hearts of the literary fellows.
LIVINGSTON: Yes, in their hearts! (pats chest loudly)
What...the hell...was THAT?
I mean, it's not even a poem!
He's saying that there's a red wheelbarrow
and it depends. 'So much depends'
What depends upon this barrow, why don't you just tell me what it is?
I...am so...outraged!
What...the hell...was their problem?
They are so out of touch with my life!
Them damn aristocrats a going with their fancy clothes and fancy teacups and fancy tablecloths!
I DON'T LIKE THAT NO MORE!!!
Why...in the hell...do I care...about some RAINWATER?
I mean...it's just some drops falling from the sky!
You get wet. So what?
I'm always here
(hits sign)
At The Wild West Bar and Grill partying with my posse!
Is there something wrong with my talk?
Them...them rich aristocrats in Britain...they talk all fancy
but I...what about me here?
I ain't that no good fancy talk.
But, but I think I talk good! I have good speak!
What is with these damn chickens?
I mean, I don't even know. They don't even relate.
How do they, how do they connect to this rainwater, and this wheelbarrow?
I mean, I don't even like chickens!
I want a good hearty hamburger, a good chunk of steak.
A T-Bone, yes a T-Bone. That's what I want right now.
Hey! Waitress! T-Bone, T-Bone right over here, yup!
And fill up a shot!
We beat them! We beat them in the war!
We went, we went, we went head to head
And the best man came out victorious and that was us!
WE BEAT THEM!
WE ARE THE KING, OK?
They can SUCK...MY...***!
Cuz I am better than them!
Cuz we beat them in that war, not once, but twice in 1812.
Battle of New Orleans baby!
YEE-HAW!!!
Screw this, I'm just going to go party with my b****es.
LIVINGSTON (left): Oh yes, that poem, William Carlos Williams.
SIR THOMAS (right): I am so annoyed at those damn Yankees in the colonies.
How dare they talk to us elite aristocrats that way!
They are the lower, we are the superior elite. LIVINGSTON: Superior!
SIR THOMAS: They have no right to speak to us in such a manner!
LIVINGSTON: No way! What do you think Winnie?
SIR THOMAS: Winnie?...Winnie???
LIVINGSTON: Winnie???
LIVINGSTON: Winnie? SIR THOMAS: Winnie, do you have anything to say?
BOTH: OH NO!
SIR THOMAS: Oh God! Winnie has perished! Send a telegram!
SIR THOMAS: Send in a telegram to 199! LIVINGSTON: 199!
SIR THOMAS: Quickly, get the telegram! I'll go get the telegram! Whoo!
LIVINGSTON: Get the telegram! Whoo!
SIR THOMAS (offscreen): Stop...dash dot dash.