Walk'n with Walken - Episode 2 - The twelve days of walken

WALKEN: Why thank you, Margret, my love. Dear, Christopher Walken. Say, what is your favorite Christmas song? Signed, Mr. Bobby. Well, Bobby, let me put it to you this way! *Music Melody: The Twelve Days of Christmas* On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me! A partridge in a pear tree! Well. on the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me! Two turtle doves! And a bird in a tree! On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me! Three French Hens! Two turtle shells. And a Partridge Family! On the fourth day of Christmas my love gave to me! Four calling birds! Three french fries! Two cups of soup! And a small drink to wash it down! On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me! Five golden rings! Fore! Three freedom fries! Two ninja turtles. And a home in a sewer! Wow! This song, it's hella long! I'm like getting winded and stuff! On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me! Six geese a laying! Five golden coins! Four more years! Three... *Walken squeak* Two bars of soap! And a peacock on NBC! Oops. Can I say ***? Oh well. On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me! Seven swans a' swimming! Six gooses getting laid! Five verses left! Four call girls Three bits of bling! Two gold teeth! And a cap popped in your ***! Yeah that's right! I'm hardcore, like that! Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom Bom On the eighth day of Christmas my shnookie pies gave to me Eight maids a milking Five quesadillas! Four 2x4s. And the bird's still in the damn tree! Get the hell out you bird! It's MY tree! I mean, you're on my freaking property and stuff! I mean, get out of the damn tree! I'm gonna have to shoot you, with a gun! Get out of the damn tree! On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me! Nine disco dancers! Eights maids a milking! Seven deadly sins! Six eggs a coming! Something, something, something, something! Four, Duh. Duh, Bum, Bah, Lahlee *Walken sequeak* More! More words! I need more words! On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me! Ten mocha lattes! Nine skimpy speedos! Eight bottles of K-Y with warming sensation! Wait! These aren't the words! These are gay! What? What the hell? I mean you guys know that I'm not gay! We've been through this 100 times I mean with the *** and everything! I don't even know why they would put this in the song?! I mean, come on! Those aren't even things I like! Oh, you're not gonna quit playing? Fine! Eleven plus one stupid verses! Nine... seven... *sigh* Eight dollars I paid for this stupid *** CD because it was on sale! Five! More like, one out of five I would give a rating for this song! Okay you know what? I'm done! I'm done! I'm not playing this stupid thing anymore! NEWMAN: And my name is Randy Newman! WALKEN: Randy? What the hell are you doing here, man? I mean, I'm singing a song! NEWMAN: Hey, Walken! I just came to share the holiday spirit with you! WALKEN: I'm perfectly capable of sharing the holiday experience with myself, if you don't mind! NEWMAN: Have it your way, Walken! I challenge you to a song off! WALKEN: I'm not gonna play your stupid games, Newman! NEWMAN: On the twelfth day of Christmas my lover gave to me! Twelve Disney sequels! WALKEN: What the hell are you talking about? You know, that's why I won't let you sing with me and stuff! NEWMAN: Eleven quesadillas! WALKEN: Dammit, Newman! You know that it's dillas! Okay, fine! Fine! I'll play with you! Ten Randy Newman is stupid! NEWMAN: Nine lives a cat has! WALKEN: Eight surgeries it's gonna take to fix your lisp! NEWMAN: That hurt my feelings! WALKEN: I don't give a ***! NEWMAN: You're not my friend! WALKEN: Randy, don't say that! NEWMAN: I'm super serious! WALKEN: Please, forgive me! NEWMAN: Okay, you're still my best friend! WALKEN: Man, I hate that freaking song! Ugh... So, to answer your question Bob, baby, sweet heart, my favorite Christmas time melody, is Jingle Bells. It has a beat I can get down with. Ooh, I can feel it, already. Ooh. Jingle bells, Jingle bells, jingle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh! Hey! Jingle, jingle.... Does this song ever freaking end? My god! I mean, I'm gonna sing the same thing, all the time? Jingle All The Way, isn't that a freaking movie? With like Arnold? Like The Terminator? He's like: I've got some toys and I'm gonna kill you! Whatever.