Mutant Mascot

Mike: WELCOME TO THE WEIRD WORLD OF "ODDITIES." Ryan: KNOCK, KNOCK. Evan: HI, RYAN. THE PLACE LOOKS FANTASTIC. DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD GET ANOTHER PERMANENT COLLECTION PIECE? WE'RE THINKING OF HAVING A BIG GRAND OPENING PARTY. OH, COOL. I'M INTERESTED IN SELLING SOMETHING TODAY, BECAUSE IT FREAKS ME OUT. DOES IT BITE? NO, BUT IT MOVES. OH, MAN. DA, DA. [ LAUGHS ] HEY, LAURA, HOW YOU DOING? EDGAR, HOW YOU DOING? NOW IT'S A PARTY! WELL, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, WE PRESENT... OH, MAN! Mike: OBSCURA AIN'T YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S ANTIQUE SHOP. WHOA! WELL, UNLESS YOUR GRANDMA'S A BIT OF A KOOK. IS THAT A STRAITJACKET? I'M MIKE. Evan: AND I'M EVAN. Both: WE'VE SPENT OUR ENTIRE LIVES... COLLECTING AND DEALING... HUNTING AND PICKING... TO GET THIS BUSINESS... DOWN TO A SCIENCE. THIS IS "ODDITIES." -- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS YEAH, I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE TO PUT HALF THE STUFF. IT'S KIND OF NICE. I LIKE BEING ABLE TO SWING MY ARMS. I'LL STAND BACK. YEAH. KNOCK, KNOCK. HEY, RYAN. HELLO. GOOD TO SEE YOU. GOOD TO SEE YOU, TOO. MIKE. GOOD TO SEE YOU. THE PLACE LOOKS FANTASTIC. WELL, THANKS, RYAN. WE'VE MOVED OBSCURA ABOUT THREE BLOCKS FROM OUR OLD LOCATION HERE IN THE EAST VILLAGE. IT'S ABOUT TWICE THE SIZE OF THE OLD SHOP. NOW WE HAVE MORE ROOM TO DISPLAY THINGS, BUT IT TAKES THAT MUCH LONGER TO PUT THEM JUST RIGHT. IT STILL HAS THE FEEL OF THE OLD PLACE. IT'S JUST A LITTLE WIDER. YEAH. NOW WE JUST HAVE TO FIND MORE STUFF. ABSOLUTELY. HERE YOU ARE. OOH. THE STORE-WARMING GIFT, IF YOU WILL. THAT'S SO SWEET. [ LAUGHS ] I'M SWEET. [ CHUCKLES ] OOH. [ LAUGHS ] RYAN. HEY, A MONKEY PAW! WOW. YEAH, A SYMBOL OF -- GOOD LUCK! EVER SINCE W.W. JACOBS FIRST PUBLISHED THE SHORT STORY, "THE MONKEY'S PAW," THEY HAVE COME TO SYMBOLIZE BAD LUCK AND GREED. I'VE ACTUALLY BLESSED THIS ONE WITH GOOD LUCK, SO I HOPE MIKE AND EVAN CAN APPRECIATE THE IRONY. I THOUGHT IT'D BE A NICE LITTLE TOUCH TO THE PERMANENT COLLECTION, LIKE THE MUMMY HEAD. WELL, RYAN, WE'LL TAKE IT IN THE SPIRIT IN WHICH IT'S GIVEN. I MEAN, WITH ALL THIS SPACE IN HERE NOW, DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD GET ANOTHER PERMANENT COLLECTION PIECE THAT JUST IS THE FIRST THING THAT YOU SEE. THAT WOULD BE NICE. WE'RE THINKING OF HAVING A BIG, GRAND OPENING PARTY NEXT WEEK. OH, COOL. AND WE REALLY WANT TO HAVE SOMETHING HERE THAT'S JUST GONNA HIT PEOPLE WHEN THEY COME IN. YEAH. "HERE WE ARE." ACTUALLY, I'M SUPPOSED TO GO SEE SOME STUFF LATER ON TODAY, SO -- GIVE US A CALL IF YOU FIND ANYTHING. WE'RE GONNA GO OUT RUNNING AROUND, AS WELL, SOON, AND GOOD LUCK, MAN. I'LL SEE YOU GUYS SOON. SO LONG, RYAN. BYE, GUYS! DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE ***. ALL RIGHT. THAT'S SWEET. IS IT? WHAT'S UP, BIG MAN? HEY, ANDY, HOW YOU DOING? WHAT'S HAPPENING? ALL RIGHT, MAN. WHAT'S -- WHAT'S SHAKING? HOW'S UPSTATE DOING? UPSTATE'S GREAT. NICE. I CAN SHOOT GUNS NAKED IN MY YARD, IF I WANT. ALL THE GOOD STUFF, MAN. YEAH. LET ME KNOW WHEN, I'M VERY INTERESTED. [ LAUGHTER ] I'M ANDY ANIMAL. I'M A MUSICIAN, COLLECTOR, ALL-AROUND PARTY DUDE. I WENT INTO AN OLD HIPPIE SHOP THE OTHER DAY, FOUND A PRETTY NEAT ITEM. WHAT -- WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS THAT? THIS IS PRETTY GREAT. PSYCHEDELIC THING. OH, OKAY. IT'S SAID TO HAVE SOME SORT OF MEDICINAL VALUE. THERE YOU GO, MAN. [ LAUGHS ] IT'S GOT A LITTLE OF EVERYTHING. IT'S GOT THE LEATHER AND THE SILK AND ALL THAT CRAZY JIMI HENDRIX TYPE STUFF. ACTUALLY, WHAT THAT IS, IS AN ELECTRIC BELT. WHICH SOUNDS LIKE A REALLY COOL BAND. YEAH, THESE WERE, LIKE, MEDICAL THINGS. THESE PARTS HERE, THIS BELT HERE, YOU'D PUT THAT INTO A SOLUTION OF, LIKE, VINEGAR OR A WEAK ACID. SO THESE THINGS WOULD START GIVING OFF A SMALL AMOUNT OF ELECTRICITY. IT WOULD SIT THERE AND SHOCK YOU, AND THEY THOUGHT THAT, YOU KNOW, IT WOULD STIMULATE THE BLOOD AND MAKE ALL THE INSIDES KIND OF ACTIVE AND EVERYTHING LIKE THAT. THE CRAZY THING IS, THIS BIT. [ LAUGHS ] YEAH, WHAT'S THAT? YEAH, PIECE HERE, I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T BE TOUCHING THIS -- WHY? [ GIGGLES ] SO, YOU'RE WEARING THIS CRAZY BELT, RIGHT? THIS PART HERE GOES RIGHT IN THE FRONT, AND THIS PART HERE GOES AROUND THE BOYS. AND IT WOULD GIVE YOU SHOCKS TO YOUR TESTICLES. I'M NOT TOTALLY OPPOSED TO GETTING MY PRIVATES SHOCKED. [ GIGGLES ] THEY THOUGHT YOU COULD CURE, LIKE, ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. YOU KNOW, BRING BACK YOUR MANHOOD AND VIRILITY, AND IF YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE IN THAT DEPARTMENT. Mike: WHILE THIS BELT CAN PRODUCE A MINIMUM AMOUNT OF ELECTRIC STIMULATION, FULL-ON SHOCK THERAPY ACTUALLY HAS BEEN IN USE FOR ABOUT 70 YEARS AND CONTINUES TODAY. BASICALLY, A DOCTOR WILL SEND A SMALL JOLT OF ELECTRICITY RIGHT INTO THE PATIENT'S BRAIN, CAUSING A SEIZURE. THEY'RE NOT ACTUALLY SURE HOW THIS WORKS, BUT APPARENTLY, IT'S CURED SOME OF THE MOST SEVERE CASES OF DEPRESSION. WHAT, DO YOU WANT TO SELL IT, OR -- YEAH, WHY NOT? YEAH, I MEAN, WE WOULD GET THESE THINGS FROM TIME TO TIME. WE SELL 'EM FOR, LIKE, 50 TO 100 BUCKS, ON AVERAGE. SO GIVE ME, LIKE, $25 FOR IT, MAN. THAT WORKS. THAT'S FINE, MAN. SWEET. DEAL? COOL, MAN. THANK YOU, MAN. YEAH. I'LL LET YOU KNOW HOW IT WORKS. YEAH, PLEASE DO. [ GIGGLES ] Eric: HI. HOW ARE YOU? ASK IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS. YOU KNOW. I HAVE A MEDICAL KIT. I KIND OF WANT TO SHOW IT TO YOU AND GET AN IDEA OF WHAT YOU THINK IT IS. ALL RIGHT, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK. OKAY. I DO ANTIQUE SHOWS, AND I MOSTLY DEAL IN BASEBALL CARDS. THE REASON I'M COMING TO OBSCURA TODAY IS BECAUSE I GOT A MEDICAL INSTRUMENT IN THE STORAGE LOCKERS, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT COULD BE USED FOR. UH, LET'S SEE. OH, YEAH. WELCOME TO THE INNER LAIR. Ryan: BEAUTIFUL, MAN. THIS IS REALLY, REALLY COOL. Mike O.: THIS IS THE CHURCH. Mike: LOOK AT THIS PLACE. SO, THIS PIECE HERE. I LOVE IT. [ LAUGHS ] WOW! WOW. Mike: THIS IS "ODDITIES." Eric: I HAVE A MEDICAL KIT. I KIND OF WANT TO SHOW IT TO YOU AND GET AN IDEA OF WHAT YOU THINK IT IS. UH, LET'S SEE. OH, YEAH. PROCTOLOGY. OH, MY GOSH. YEAH, ACTUALLY, THIS IS A SIGMOIDOSCOPE. IT'S YOUR BASIC PROCTOLOGY EXAM INSTRUMENT. I NOTICED IT HAS -- IT HAS, I GUESS, THOSE WOULD BE THREE INSERTION DEVICES. YES, YES. SHORT, MEDIUM, AND LONG. OKAY. IT LOOKS BARELY USED -- HOPEFULLY. [ LAUGHS ] UM, SORRY. THAT'S A LITTLE PERSONAL. DOCTOR INSERTS THIS PART, REMOVES THIS PART. BECAUSE WITHOUT THIS, THIS WOULD BE INCREDIBLY PAINFUL. ONCE YOU HAVE THIS IN THERE, THEY USE THIS BLADDER, AND THEY BLOW AIR IN THE CAVITY. BECAUSE YOU WANT THE WALLS AS FAR APART AS POSSIBLE SO YOU CAN SEE WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING AT. OKAY. SIGMOIDOSCOPES ARE USED TO SEE INTO THE LARGE INTESTINE TO DETECT ANY NUMBER OF AILMENTS. THE OLD-FASHIONED KIND USED TO OPEN UP AND ILLUMINATE THE CAVITY SO THE DOCTOR CAN SEE INSIDE. BUT THE NEW ONES HAVE TINY CAMERAS THAT TRANSMIT AN IMAGE TO A MONITOR. SO, IT IS AN INTERESTING PIECE. WE DO HAVE COLLECTORS WHO MIGHT LIKE THIS FOR ONE REASON OR ANOTHER. PEOPLE COLLECT THIS? THEY DO. WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE? PEOPLE WHO HAVE OTHER INTERESTS. ALL RIGHT. WOULD YOU GIVE ME $150 FOR IT? THIS BEST I CAN DO ON THIS WOULD BE $125. THAT'S, LIKE, TOP DOLLAR. I CERTAINLY WOULDN'T PAY MORE THAN THAT IF I FOUND IT IN A MARKET OR SOMETHING. UM, I WANT TO TRY AND GET RID OF IT. I WOULD TAKE $125. THAT WOULD BE OKAY. ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT? THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU. YOU'RE NOT GONNA MISS IT, ARE YOU? Ryan: I SUGGESTED TO MIKE AND EVAN THAT THE NEW SHOP REALLY NEEDS AN AMAZING CENTERPIECE. SO I CONTACTED MY OLD FRIEND, PAUL, WHO HAS A MIND-BLOWING COLLECTION AND MIGHT BE WILLING TO PART WITH SOME OF IT. LET ME SHOW YOU AROUND. COOL. LET'S DO IT. WOW, MAN, THIS IS GIGANTIC. YEAH. THIS STUFF IS BEAUTIFUL, MAN. THANK YOU. BEAUTIFUL. IT'S REALLY ABOUT BEING CROSSOVER FROM THE TATTOO WORLD TO THE ART WORLD, AND KIND OF MERGE THE TWO HERE AS A CONDUIT. Paul: LAST RITES IS FOR PEOPLE THAT APPRECIATE DARK ART AND DARK SURREALISM. IT'S REALLY A VERY COMFORTABLE ATMOSPHERIC PLACE WHERE IT'S KIND OF DARK AND CREEPY, BUT WARM AND INVITING AT THE SAME TIME. ALL RIGHT. COOL, MAN. WELCOME TO THE INNER LAIR. PRETTY SPOOKY BACK HERE, PAUL. THERE YOU GO. OH, WOW. I DON'T USUALLY KEEP IT THIS BRIGHT IN HERE. WOW, MAN, YOU HAVE A LOT OF STUFF PACKED INTO THIS LITTLE ROOM. YOUR MUMMIFIED CAT? YEAH, YEAH, I GOT ONE. HE'S GOT A REALLY NICE EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE. THIS IS REALLY, REALLY COOL, BUT I DON'T KNOW IF IT WOULD NECESSARILY WORK AS A CENTERPIECE. YEAH, WELL, THERE'S THREE SKELETONS. OH, GEEZ, I DIDN'T EVEN SEE THOSE. THERE'S A DOCTOR WHO DIED, AND THEY HAD AN ESTATE SALE. AND I HAPPENED TO BE IN THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME. YEAH, I'LL SAY. SO I PICKED THEM UP. I LOVE IT BECAUSE OF THE DIFFERENT STAGES OF GROWTH, FROM FETAL TO 7-YEAR-OLD, TO ABOUT 27-YEAR-OLD. I JUST LOVE THE WAY THEY LINE UP IN SIZE. A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T REALIZE THAT YOUR BONES DON'T EVEN STOP GROWING UNTIL YOU'RE ABOUT 25 YEARS OLD. ONE OF THE WAYS THAT YOU CAN TELL THE APPROXIMATE AGE OF A SKELETON IS BY THE BONES. YOU START OUT HAVING, LIKE, OVER 300 BONES, AND THEN IT ENDS UP BEING 206. OH, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT. YEAH. YOUR FEMUR STARTS OUT AS THREE BONES. YOU CAN SEE AT THE BOTTOM, THERE'S A CAP. AT THE VERY TOP, THERE'S A CAP, AND AT THE VERY END OF THE FEMUR, THERE'S ALSO A CAP. BETWEEN THE AGES OF ABOUT 18 AND 20, THOSE START TO FUSE INTO ONE BONE. WOW, I DIDN'T REALIZE THAT THOSE BONES CHANGE SO DRASTICALLY. INTERESTING. YEAH. I'M ALWAYS LOOKING FOR THESE THINGS. MY ONLY PROBLEM, I THINK, RIGHT NOW IN MY MIND, IS WE HAVE A LOT OF SKELETONS IN THE STORE. I THINK FOR NOW, I WOULD PASS, AS FAR AS THE CENTERPIECE. BUT DUDE, I TRULY APPRECIATE YOU LETTING ME COME IN HERE. OH, I APPRECIATE YOU COMING BY, MAN. THIS PLACE IS AMAZING. GOOD TO SEE YOU. COOL. JUST HAVING THIS THING IN MY POSSESSION HAS GIVEN ME NIGHTMARES. Mike: YOU MIND IF I TRY IT OUT? UH, YEAH. [ LAUGHS ] HEY, LAURA, HOW YOU DOING? AND WITHOUT FURTHER ADO WE PRESENT... OH, MAN. [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] Mike: THIS IS "ODDITIES." THIS IS TOTALLY GORGEOUS. WE'RE ON THE HUNT FOR A CENTERPIECE FOR THE NEW SHOP. OUR MASCOT, IF YOU WILL. WE HEARD ABOUT A GUY UPSTATE WHO APPARENTLY HAS SOME REALLY COOL STUFF, SO WE'RE GONNA SEE HIM. WE NEED TO GET THIS THING IN PLACE. OUR OPENING PARTY'S COMING UP SOON. AND WE WANT SOMETHING THAT'LL REALLY AMAZE OUR CUSTOMERS. HI. HOW YOU DOING? COME ON IN. LOOK AT THIS. GREAT PLACE YOU HAVE HERE. OH, THANK YOU. Evan: OHH. WOW. IT'S JUST PERFECT. Mike: WOW. IS THIS ALL YOUR WORK? THE TAXIDERMY WORK IS MINE. THESE PIECES HERE AND THE TURKEY AND THE DEER. I SHOT BOTH OF THEM. YOU EAT 'EM, TOO? I EAT 'EM, TOO, YEP. Mike O.: I'M AN ARTIST. I TAKE A NONTRADITIONAL APPROACH TO TAXIDERMY. INSTEAD OF MAKING THE MOUNT LOOK REAL, OR ALIVE, I MAKE IT LOOK DEAD. [ LAUGHS ] THESE PIECES HERE, I TRY TO COMBINE WITH -- WITH DIFFERENT OBJECTS. THIS IS AN OLD MOUNT, YOU KNOW, WHICH IS KIND OF THE DIRECTION I'M GOING THESE DAYS OF TAKING OLD, DECREPIT MOUNTS AND REUSING THEM. Mike: WITH THE OLD MOUNTS, DO BE CAREFUL. VERY OFTEN, THEY WOULD USE VERY POISONOUS SUBSTANCES, A LOT OF ARSENIC. OH, YEAH? SO YOU'LL FIND A LOT OF THE POWDERY STUFF? SO GLOVES, RESPIRATOR, YEAH. OH, THANK YOU. IT'S A LITTLE LATE TO TELL ME THAT, BUT -- [ LAUGHS ] THIS IS GREAT, AND IT IS UNUSUAL, BUT WE REALLY SPECIALIZE IN THE SORT OF VINTAGE AND ANTIQUE STUFF, OR NATURAL FREAK STUFF. I MEAN, WOULD YOU HAPPEN TO HAVE ANYTHING LIKE THAT? YEAH, I DO HAVE SOME OLDER PIECES AND OLDER MOUNTS THAT I'M WORKING ON NOW IN THE CHURCH. WOW. THAT'S YOUR CHURCH? YEAH. THAT'S MINE. WOW, THAT'S COOL. MAY WE? OF COURSE. [ CHURCH BELL TOLLS ] Mike O.: THE CHURCH WAS BUILT IN 1867. IT WAS AN OLD METHODIST CHURCH. IT'S MULTIFUNCTION, YOU KNOW. SOMETIMES I USE IT AS A STUDIO, SOMETIMES TO DISPLAY WORK. THIS IS THE CHURCH. Mike: THIS IS REALLY BEAUTIFUL. Evan: IT'S BEAUTIFUL! LOOK AT THIS PLACE. SO THIS PIECE HERE, I LOVE IT, AND I'VE EVEN NAMED IT. I NAMED IT AFTER MY PARENTS. IT'S CALLED VIC AND BOBBI. REALLY? YEAH. AND YOU'LL SEE WHY IN A SECOND. [ LAUGHS ] WOW! WOW, YOU MUST HAVE SOME INTERESTING PARENTS. [ LAUGHS ] WOW, THAT IS INSANE. I'VE NEVER SEEN ONE QUITE LIKE THAT. OF COURSE, THESE DON'T LIVE VERY LONG. NO. SOMETHING THAT MUTATED PROBABLY WOULDN'T HAVE MADE IT. THANKFULLY. YEAH, MUCH LONGER THAN A FEW DAYS. THAT -- YEAH, THAT BIT RIGHT THERE IS PARTICULARLY TWISTED. THAT IS HIGHLY UNUSUAL. I MEAN, THIS IS EXACTLY THE KIND OF THING THAT WE LOVE. PERFECT IN THE SHOP. THIS IS PERFECT. DO YOU HAVE A PRICE IN MIND FOR IT? UM, COULD YOU GO $2,500? I MEAN, I THINK -- WHERE ARE WE GONNA FIND ANOTHER -- YEAH, THIS HAS GOT TO BE THE ONLY ONE. ALL RIGHT. I THINK WE HAVE A NEW MASCOT. ALL RIGHT, THAT'S A DEAL. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. CAN I COME VISIT? ANY TIME. ABSOLUTELY. BEAUTIFUL. HEY, HOW YOU DOING? HI. I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN HERE BEFORE. MY NAME'S SCHAFFER THE DARK LORD. I WAS HERE A FEW MONTHS AGO. I BOUGHT A PICKLED MONKEY SPINE FROM RYAN. OH, YEAH, YEAH, HOW'D THAT GO? IT WAS WONDERFUL. I ACTUALLY AM INTERESTED IN SELLING SOMETHING TODAY BECAUSE IT FREAKS ME OUT. DOES IT BITE? NO, BUT IT MOVES. DO YOU HAVE IT WITH YOU? I DO. I'M A RAPPER FROM NEW YORK CITY. THE MATERIAL I GRAVITATE TOWARD IS SKELETONS, DEMONS, SATAN, EVIL IMAGERY, DRAGONS, FIRE. BUT I DO HAVE LIMITS. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. OH, MAN! [ LAUGHS ] Mike: THIS IS "ODDITIES." Schaffer: I'M INTERESTED IN SELLING SOMETHING TODAY BECAUSE IT FREAKS ME OUT. DOES IT BITE? NO, BUT IT MOVES. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. OH, MAN. OHH. WOW. THAT'S A GOOD NIGHTMARE, THIS THING. IT'S BEEN GIVING ME NIGHTMARES, AND THAT'S WHY IT'S GOT TO GO. I COULD SEE WHY THAT WOULD FREAK YOU OUT. [ LAUGHS ] IT'S BASICALLY LIKE AN AUTOMATON. YOU KNOW, WIND-UP TOYS. THEY'VE BEEN AROUND, ACTUALLY, FOR HUNDREDS OF YEARS. PROBABLY ORIGINALLY HAD CLOTHING ON IT. WHERE'D YOU PICK THAT UP? A TRUNK OF SOME OF MY GRANDMOTHER'S OLD BELONGINGS. IT HAD BEEN IN AN ATTIC FOR DECADES. RIGHT. WHEN I PULLED IT OUT, IT MOVED. [ LAUGHS ] I'M NOT REALLY KIDDING WHEN I TELL YOU THAT JUST HAVING THIS THING IN MY POSSESSION HAS GIVEN ME NIGHTMARES. YEAH, YEAH. IT'S WEIRD. CREEPY BABY DOLLS FREAK PEOPLE OUT, LIKE CLOWNS. THERE'S ACTUALLY A FEAR OF CREATURES THAT LOOK HUMAN, BUT YOU CAN TELL ARE NOT, CALLED AUTOMATONOPHOBIA. THE NONLIVING REANIMATION JUST FREAKS PEOPLE OUT. YEAH, I THINK I JUST GOT DIAGNOSED. [ LAUGHS ] Mike: AUTOMATONS HAVE BEEN AROUND FOR HUNDREDS IF NOT THOUSANDS OF YEARS. HOWEVER, THE FIRST INDUSTRIAL ROBOT WAS INSTALLED AT A G.M. FACTORY IN THE EARLY 1960s. IT WAS MADE BY A DESIGNER NAMED DEVOL AND AN ENGINEER NAMED ENGELBERGER. IT WAS ACTUALLY BASED ON THE WORKS OF ISAAC ASIMOV. IT WAS BASICALLY A COILED SPRING IN HERE ATTACHED TO THIS KEY, WHICH IS PERMANENT. YOU MIND IF I TRY IT OUT? YEAH, IF YOU WANT YOUR SOUL DAMNED, GO RIGHT AHEAD. ABSOLUTELY. YOU DO WHAT YOU GOT TO DO. LET ME MAKE A LITTLE ROOM HERE. SOME OF THESE THINGS REALLY LIKE TO TAKE OFF. YEAH. [ WINDING ] OH, YEAH. [ LAUGHS ] LOOK AT THAT THING. NO -- NO, THANKS. KIND OF JERKY MOTION. IT'S REALLY -- IT IS QUITE UNSETTLING. LOOK AT THAT. IT'S LIKE A HORROR MOVIE. DA DA! NO. SO, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR -- FOR THIS CUTIE PIE? YOU KNOW, I JUST -- I DON'T WANT TO THROW IT AWAY BECAUSE -- IT'LL COME BACK TO HAUNT YOU. YEAH, YEAH. YOU'LL WAKE UP, AND IT'LL BE CRAWLING ACROSS YOUR FLOOR. I GUARANTEE YOU, THERE'S SOMEONE WHO WOULD LOVE THIS THING. YEAH. I COULD DO $40. I MEAN, IT'S CHEAPER THAN A THERAPY SESSION, PLUS I'LL RID YOU OF YOUR DEMON HERE. IT CERTAINLY IS. I CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH FOR JUST TAKING IT OFF MY HANDS. GREAT. WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU. YOU BET. HEY, LAURA, HOW YOU DOING? Evan: HEY, COME ON IN. HEY, GUYS. HOW YOU DOING? HELLO! WE'RE THROWING A LITTLE PARTY TO CELEBRATE THE NEW SHOP. WE'VE INVITED A FEW FRIENDS AND CUSTOMERS TO CHECK OUT THE PLACE. IT SHOULD BE QUITE A PARTY. Ryan: THERE'S ACTUAL SPACE. WE HAVE ROOM FOR ANDY NOW. [ GIGGLES ] Evan: MICHAEL! HOW ARE YOU? WELCOME. INTERESTING GROUP OF FRIENDS. YES. HEY. EDGAR IS HERE. EDGAR, HOW YOU DOING? NOW IT'S A PARTY! GOOD TO SEE YOU. HAVE YOU MET MIKE? NO. THIS IS ROBOMIKE. HI. EDGAR. HE MAKES SPECIAL ROBOTS. SO DID YOU MAKE ALL THIS? YEAH, THAT'S HIS WORK RIGHT THERE. TYPE OF ROBOTS MOVIE. I'D LOVE TO SEE SOME OF YOUR MOVIES. OH, LOOK, MONIQUE'S A MONKEY. [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] DO YOU DIG THE NEW SPACE? IT'S VERY OPEN... I KNOW. WHICH I LIKE, BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I LIKE KIND OF BLENDING IN MORE WITH THE WALLS. Evan: ONE OF THE KEY REASONS WE INVITED PEOPLE OVER TONIGHT WAS TO UNVEIL OUR NEW SIGNATURE PIECE, OR OUR VERSION OF A STORE MASCOT. HEY, EVERYBODY. OH. THANKS, AGAIN, FOR EVERYONE FOR COMING OUT HERE TONIGHT. I MEAN, WE'VE BEEN OPEN SORT OF FOR A LITTLE BIT NOW, BUT THIS IS OUR GRAND OPENING, AND AGAIN, GLAD YOU COULD ALL MAKE IT. GOOD AURA. YEAH, RIGHT? ABSOLUTELY. NICE SMELL, TOO. OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU, MIKE. [ LAUGHTER ] WE'RE SO HAPPY TO HAVE ALL OUR BEST FRIENDS HERE. AND THE THREE OF US LOOKED LONG AND HARD FOR THE NEWEST MEMBER OF THE OBSCURA FAMILY. WE ACTUALLY FOUND THIS PIECE UPSTATE IN A FORMER CHURCH. THE GENTLEMAN WHO OWNS IT IS AN EMINENT ECCENTRIC. AND HE HAD THIS, AND HE THOUGHT HE COULDN'T IMPROVE UPON IT -- WHICH HE COULDN'T. ONCE YOU SEE IT, YOU'LL KNOW WHY. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THIS THING, MAN. WELL, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, WE PRESENT... Woman: OHH! Ryan: OH, MAN! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] Evan: HERE THEY ARE. LOOK AT THIS! THAT LOOKS AWESOME. Evan: SO THIS IS A LITTLE MORE UNUSUAL THAN THE AVERAGE TWO-HEADED CALF. Mike: OF COURSE, IT HAS THE TWO HEADS. BACK ON THIS END, HE HAS TWO TAILS, WHICH IS HIGHLY UNUSUAL. THEN YOU HAVE SIX LEGS. Ryan: THIS PERSON, DID HE STUFF IT, OR HE HAD IT STUFFED? NO, ACTUALLY, IT'S AN OLD SPECIMEN THAT HE FOUND. AND HE DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO USE IT IN A WORK OF ART, 'CAUSE IT ALREADY IS A WORK OF ART. PRETTY COOL, RIGHT? Woman: I LOVE IT. [ GASPS ] THANKS AGAIN, FOR COMING DOWN. MINGLE AS LONG AS YOU LIKE, STAY AS LONG YOU'D LIKE. HAVE A LOOK AROUND AT THE NEW COW, AND THANK YOU VERY MUCH, GUYS. EAT, DRINK, AND BE MERRY. [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] Mike: IT TOOK A WHILE TO FIND THE NEW STORE CENTERPIECE, BUT I THINK IT WAS A HUGE SUCCESS. THE ONLY THING LEFT TO SAY, WELCOME TO THE NEW OBSCURA. [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ]