Legit S2E1 - English Transcript

Subsfactory presents Legit 2x01 - Loveline Silviabbà, Doc, seanma, Maricchia Revision: Adduari Ouch. But hello! Who are you? Who are you? I lost everything. / i You have not lost me. Do not move MAMMA ***! Hello, Jim? Jimmy? Noooooooooooooooooooo! ***! Damn! Jim will take a hit. Beautiful, put "PLAY", I want to see the end. - It's coming. - So what? Okay, the phone has run drenched. I was jerking off in the shower. *** mom who called - And fell into the cup. - Damn moms! ***'ll ruin the dawn of time. Try it without looking at ***. How? Using imagination? What you're looking at? "Red Moon over Odessa. " I can not believe you watch the movie from which they kicked me out! - It is very nice, Jim. - It 's great. How do you bringing this? The damage to the movies again! Look, Jim, it's not because you wanted to *** co-star and you have fired which now should we deprive ourselves of the show. I never *** that girl. I just made a joke about *** that girl after he insinuated that I'd *** and might have seemed that I was ***, but I never ***! Enjoy your stupid little film. Not stupid, Jim. E 'genius. Ah, s ى? Well, I'm going to "Loveline" and the two of you are no longer invited. Yeah, invite canceled. - Oh, no. - What a drag. Ok, let's recap. Peggy leaves Jim. Jim loses an important role in a movie. Then Jim drops the phone in the cup, while he masturbated. Why had he called his mother. Jimmy, tells him a little ***, yo. A bit much ***. Do you know what I'm doing right now? I go to the car with my legs. Right? And with the car until to "Loveline", while you do not. I'll do it with the power of my legs, Billy. Dest-sinist, dest-sinist, dest-sinist. I walk, spastic. Do not worry, Jim! Roles in films that win awards, captain often! It is up to a thousand, my spastichetto. Crushing "PLAY". Oh, no. Okay, the next phone call, here to "Loveline" is by Mikey from Seattle. Hello, Mikey. Hello, then, s ى. I have this weird thing that grows on me ***. Hey, Mikey Mikey, you're live on the radio, man. We use medical terminology correctly, say "***. " Do you have a papilloma virus, is very common. Listen, Mikey, I know nothing percentages Jim. - Fairly accurate. - You have to go to the doctor, you need to vaccinate. - You need to use a ***, friend, you know? - Do not use them as drunk. Who uses them as drunk? - Even when you're drunk. - And it is strange, because that's when you go *** with ones that maybe it is the case to use them. - Even when you're drunk. - Exactly. You know, but you're drunk for. Now we take a break, do not go away, we are to "Loveline. " The critics agree: "Luna Rossa above Odessa" is the masterpiece of the year. Hey, have you heard, you, the gossip about this movie? I know that the main character will be in the next "Star Wars. " - And who would want that role? - "Star Wars"? Well, Ewan McGregor has ruined us. The last were not good movies, undeniable. I heard that the actress of this movie was almost *** by a piece of *** - always an actor, s ى. - What? And then she used this experience to emotional rise to a level never experienced before. Almost. Almost ***. Do not *** her for real, right? So maybe helped her in acting. So, maybe you could thank him. Beautiful, this was too heavy for you. Welcome back to "Loveline. " Jim Jefferies do you have on your hands now, maybe I advertise. At the moment nothing, but who knows nothing at the moment . Okay. Our next call, here "Loveline," is Patty. - Patty from Seattle, hello. - Hello, Dr. Drew. - I am live radio? - S ى. So there was this guy I was dating . His name was Tim. He masturbated constantly. Type, always, always. He ​​was obsessed with ***. For example, he masturbated - always before having sex. - Maybe he was a gentleman, that was trying to take longer for you, for your pleasure. In the airplane, went to the bathroom - In the airplane? - The long journeys, for the breaking of the time. I kept asking for threesomes. - Well, not to hate you for asking. - Patty, do you have any question? I call him. Oh, no, Patty. No, no, no. - Let's go. - Look, this guy - is a ***. - "***". They say "***. " - Only medical terms. - It seems that Tim is a ***. Not only that, but it shows several aspects of *** addiction . Come on, it does not even exist, right? Jim, s ى exists. And ' different than having a healthy sex drive. People just can not handle their *** desires. But everyone likes sex, therefore, by definition everyone is obsessed with? If you cos ى, we're all sex addicts. Patty, this guy will never be able to have a healthy relationship with you, or with anyone else, if not receiving the right help. And I was also proud. I spoke of the glory hole at the Frankfurt The threesomes in Lincoln, Nebraska, of the many prostitutes, and then a transvestite in South Africa. - Africa? - Patty never do that in Africa, never, not even in South Africa . And you, Patty, really you went to bed with him? - Can we move on? - S ى, and he cheated on me with another woman and you know what he did? The has literally locked in a suitcase, then carry it around in the trunk of his stupid car orange ***. That car is fantastic! Ok? - It was the Thai transvestite. - It's me, Jim, I'm Peggy. Really? Peggy? - Cabbage. - Wait, you know Jim? S ى, Peggy is my ex-girlfriend. - Fantastic. - It 's you who is talking? What are you doing, Peggy? I called right to tell you to turn the nation taking to bed the first that happens, is a way of life sad and pathetic. And how come you remember smiling and all of my friends gave me five? *** you, Jim. You know what? - Do not call me ever again. - You were the one to call live. - You're a ***! - ***! - Terms for radio. - You have to stand up to the glory hole? It depends, more than anything else, from that side of the wall you are. You sure you want to continue? - S ى. - Safe? - S ى. - How to do the test? Okay, Jim, let's take a short quiz, shall we? Through this we can determine whether or not you sessodipendente. - S ى. - Well. Need *** activities more and more different or more frequent or extreme to reach the same level of excitement or pleasure? - S ى. - S ى. S ى! S ى. When was the last time you masturbated that? - An hour ago? - An hour ago? Shortly before I came here. Spend a lot of time looking at ***? - S ى. - Absolutely. - I know, I have plenty of free time. - It does nothing all day. - It 'a comedian. - Next question. Your every new relationship has the same self-destructive path last? Well, I'm single, so ى s, none worked, so there's I can see? So ى s, ى s, s ى, no to 8 - At least the animals are safe. - It s ى to 9. Began almost made me sad I think you should think about going to a meeting for sex addicts. I do not know if it's really for me. Look, now I'm writing the address of a great group. The guy who runs it is fantastic. All worship him. - Here. - Are you sure it has a problem? - Jim! - Tell me. You can not even go there, but at least do me a favor see how much you resist without seeing the ***. E 'since I broke the phone I'm not doing anything. - Think about it - Okay. If there is really a sex addiction, you have it for sure. Do not think about my addictions, think your damned dependencies. I'm going through a bad time. Georgia has recently brought Emily in Cincinnati with "Todd snob", although will have to treat myself. - Todd snob and do not rhyme. - There should be close enough. You'll need to take care of yourself while who came first? The chicken or the egg? S ى, I might be an alcoholic, but so are you. I thought we were talking about sex addiction and alcohol. - They are two completely different things. - You're definitely addicted to sex. - There'll never make it to live without ***. - Come here! - I'm sorry. - We do the. Can! You love ***. You can stop talking about ***? When we talk about the things I want to do I can not do. Unless you're touching me. - Already done. Not bad, but do not do it again. - I'm mortified You can have dependencies, I do not. Let's say wanted me to speed. You legherei arm myself and so much of what you inietterei speed that your little heart deboluccio literally explode. - What kind. - Come on, Nathan. Mom, what is the speed? In fact you smoke, no injection sorry. Goodbye. - I need a new phone. - What happened to this? - Tell him, Jim. - I fell into the cup. And how did he do? I I take care of the disabled. I take care of him and him. It is not an easy job. Lo I was carrying in the bathroom and I fell out of his pocket, between her legs piccine, Straight into the water and the phone is broken. Put it in place! - Why? - E 'for the event valid insurance on this phone? - No. - E 'I should call their doctors Let's see what I can do. Big, Billy, to gamble away the paper the handicapped. Super parking, a free phone. How do you block ***. Enough about ***. 'all day that I have it hard. - From now on, use your imagination. - There'll never make it. Saws can do that for me. Only *** is prohibited. Good luck. Hello, imagination. Ok there is a *** on his knees. Enter five Bellucci of different nationalities. What can you do with all those dicks? Do you want to cry? Ok baby sitter. A normal sized *** is not for me. I crave huge ones. The bigger they are, the better. I'm like a sewer rat. E. . . I try to remain faithful, but I like too huge ***. Will always cos ى. Thank you, Tess, splendid. S ى, Fred, you want to talk about? S ى. Hello, I'm Fred. Hello, Fred. My wife does not trust me. - Jenny! Jim Jefferies. - I've disappointed too many times. Babysitter, secretaries her sister. I want at all costs to remain with my family, and I thank you for these meetings. I live day by day. I love my wife. Thank you, Fred. Anyone else? ى, Jenny. Hello, my name is Jenny. - Hello, Jenny. - "Hey, L. A. "! E. . . are sessodipendente. When do my worst I am able to get drunk and and go to bed with anyone. And I mean anyone. I was ruining my life. The worst I think was when I ended up in the trunk of a inside a suitcase. I do not find myself very much at ease to talk about these things, so - say no more for now. - Thank you, Jenny. I see tonight the group has a new member. I was wondering if you wanted to tell us something. - S ى, well - It is not mandatory. No, I'm I'm here on purpose. Hello, I'm Jim. - Hello, Jim. - Hello, Jim. The reason why I'm here Is the fact that I find it hard bond with people from a point of view emotional. Col sex I get along. I have a normal ***, then I'm not right for you, Tess. You hunt megacazzi Ah, I was the one to put in the trunk Jenny. - Here you remain anonymous, Jenny. - What? I can not say the name knew a girl Katie Knox. I loved her. He was 16 years old. His father hated me. He did not like this kid came from window in the room of her daughter, late at night, you know? Ah, I forgot to say one thing. I, too, was 16 years old. Critical to understand the context. I was 16 years old, she was 16 years old. The rest of the story is accurate, father hates me. This is me. I struggled , you know, great, with a knife between his teeth, but she becomes bigger. And I have sex with fantastic unbridled sex. Not for this I do not ever do. I do not I would never do. Although is my daughter. We do not judge. We should. This deserves to be judged. Lord the ought to be judged by all of us, otherwise end up being judged by a judge and a jury. Why do not hold this, ***? Jim. I wanted to thank you. Thank me? Why? To have interrupted the type who wants to be his daughter? Well, it sucks. No, because with you I hit rock bottom. - Huh? - Really I never realized that I had taken the road of ugly and then it was too late. Please. Well - Ok. S ى. - Thank you. Limoniamo? - No. . . - We are sex addicts. Look, I do not know how you serve these meetings, but will be honest, I have changed my life. - Okay. - Ok. - I'll see you. Ok. - I'll see you Look here ', drunken loser. - Tell me. - Grow up and pull out of your *** that stubborn bald , or drag you to court before he can say " A 12-pack of Schlitz Malt Liquor. " Okay. "12 *** in her face cazzona a ***. " Bad ***. I miss my daughter. I do not believe that something so sweet ى output is similar to an acid. Jim! How is the course for sex addicts? There is a course, not teach to become sessodipendente. There were beautiful girls? - There was Jenny. - The "Hey, L. A. ?" S ى. He says he hit rock bottom thanks to me. Cute! We're coming to the head? Are you healed? Not heal. Apparently, I have to complete a course that will have a profound impact on me and in the end, I do not love me more saws. - But you will continue to fartele, no? - Of course I will continue to do that for me. But I vergogner myself. I'd do a saw, now. Billy, come here! Look at me while I play with the coin. Sure! So ى can not sleep. I was there almost . Do not eat money! Are you ready? Drew, I need your help. I'm Dr. Drew. Who is it? - I'm Jim Jefferies. - Hey Jim. What's going on? I was at the meeting. There is one who wants to be her daughter. I'm not perverted as him, right? The ridiculous thing is that now I can not help but think my behavior and I do not like. If the group is not for you, I can recommend a good therapist. And, in any case, I think is beginning to be a little 'depressed. Depression? Sad! I want you engage in this process, open yourself, be sincere and see how it goes. I know, you're right. I watched Dr. Phil the other day, and said such a thing. Have you taken seriously Dr. Phil? Why do not you take advice from Rachel Ray, and get it over with? I'm at the movies with my wife, and I have to disconnect . - What movie were you watching? - We saw "Red Moon over Odessa. " A great movie! There whippet! I want what I want it all. I want to meet a nice girl fall in love and get married. I want a fairytale story. I came out with so many ى *** I think of not being able to attend good girls. These *** have ruined me, in a sense. Good girls are good people, but did not have sad childhood to make them good in bed. When a good girl takes it in the *** Thinks to himself "It's not so bad ى!" "I hope you are enjoying your birthday. " When, however, it's a *** to take it in the *** thinks, "You know what would be better?" "Two *** in the ***. " - Yeah. - This, to me, is the main difference. It is not so ى? - True! Two dicks. - Thank you for listening. Behind your humor, lies a grain of truth, Jim. - Thank you for sharing your story. - By the way *** do not just suck *** . They do - for themselves, not for you. - Jim! Jim! Thank you for sharing your story. Well, the meeting is about to end. If you do not mind, I'd like to talk about myself. As you already know, I'm Dave. And I sessodipendente. - Hello, Dave. - Hello, Dave. I was an agent of the show, I represented all that great. But then I lost everything because of the way in which I lived. All come here for a reason. You know, deep in your heart, that if you do not solve your problems 'll end up becoming old, alone, exhausted, fats and alcohol, lying face down in the trash with nothing. And you know why? Why have shattered all your relationships. And you hurt people. Do you hurt the people who loved him. Because if you give priority to your addiction and yourself and not working on the day will come Where you'll find yourself alone with the person you have become. And then, my dear friends, will not be for anything fun. Who wants to spicy chicken wings? Let prayer and take the wings spicy, okay? S ى? Perfect! I want to introduce you to a person. Hello. He is Billy. - Jim? - Hello, Billy. - Billy, she is Tess. - Hello, Tess. - Tess is in my class for sex addicts. - Wait! Him? - Jim? - What's going on? - What are you doing? - Trust and launched! Jim! But hello, Billy! You're doing great, Tess. You deserve it and I think that Billy will have their own needs, so enjoy. Good night, boys. - Good night. - Goodnight, Jim. Hello, Billy. Steve? Steve. God! Billy! - Cripple dirty! - S ى, you're right. - Tess. - My God! I do not think I rivorranno in the basement of that church. Hello. Goodnight, Steve. Good night, Mom. - My God! - Thanks again, Jim. God!