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Previously on Everwood�
You would�ve never gone for Ephram?
Not my type.
I mean, no offense but
I�m actually more into
guys like your brother.
Bright?
Surprising shallow.
Are you asking me out?
I was trying to.
I�m sorry.
I think I�m in love
with somebody else.
-Do I know him?
-No.
Someone I went to high school with.
Let me tell you about
the birds and the bees
and the flowers and the trees�
Nice voice.
-Sound a little like Rod Stewart.
-I�ll take it.
So what can I do you for, Ephram?
Oh, I-I just- I just came
by to talk to Dr.
Jake.
I don�t have
an appointment, but
won�t be more
than 15 seconds.
No problem.
He just got in.
Go on back to Exam Room One
and I�ll let him know you�re here.
Thanks.
Ephram Brown.
Seems to be a - pretty common
last name around here.
Unless?
Yeah.
Son of�
You�re Andy Brown�s son.
No way?
Way.
Your dad is the man.
I looked him up when I got here.
There-there are like 500,000
websites with his name in them.
He�s like the Madonna
-of medicine.
- I�ll be sure to pass that on.
Well, so what are you doing here?
I mean, I just came by to get
y�know tested for whatever.
Sexually.
I mean whatever you test
for go ahead and test away.
Sure.
We can do that - no problem.
Uh, I just need you to fill out
some paperwork here.
It�s just, uh, basic *** history
stuff, if that�s okay.
It�s standard procedure.
Yeah, no, that�s great.
Okay, here you go.
So what�s he like
as a dad? Is he cool?
Yeah, I mean, y�know, he�s, uh,
he�s-he�s my dad.
When I was a resident at Cedars,
I met tons of famous people so you know,
you�d meet their kids and
they�d be all kinds of crazy.
I just figured that anybody
who is as successful as your dad
would probably be a lousy parent,
-but y-you seem pretty normal.
-Yeah, it�s asking me here
If I�ve ever had sex with animals?
Oh, yeah, people do weird things.
Just write no.
-Unless?
-NO!
Definitely no.
This is kind of funny.
I-I usually don�t get this excited.
I mean I treated Spielberg.
Conventional intercourse would be?
Uh, intercourse with a woman.
Right.
Anyway, all the other residents,
they were totally curious.
Y�know, like what kind of DVDs
did Spielberg bring in?
What kind of books did he read?
I - I am done.
Oh, great.
Okay.
You know on the unprotected
question, umm,
let�s say like two
times you didn�t have
something with you
and-and once it broke.
I mean, what are your odds
of catching something?
Seeing as you�re not
an intravenous drug user
and you�ve only had one partner,
I consider you a low-risk candidate.
Good.
So you�re not currently sexually active?
Uh, no, I�m not.
Uh,
but I�m hoping to be,
which is why I�m here.
Well, that�s responsible of you.
I kinda gotta get going, so�
Of course.
Okay, we can do these
tests for you right now.
I�ll run the whole panel and
we can have results for you
within a few days.
Back in a flash.
"Best Laid Plans"
How�s it going, beautiful.
Ah, spare me the sweet talk and
tell me that you can do short order.
That good, huh?
Yeah.
Hey, have you seen Andy
at all around today?
Uh, actually I haven�t.
Why is everything okay?
Yeah, yeah.
I just need to talk to him.
So, hey, how�s everything going
with the high school guy?
Y�know the one that
you�re in love with.
Oh, oh, yeah, it�s going okay.
Just okay?
Well, what did he say when you
told him? Did he flip out?
Not exactly.
What are y.
.
? Jake?
Talk to me.
What happened?
You�re not allowed back here.
I know.
I know, it�s
a high security post.
So what�s going on?
Nothing�s going on.
I haven�t said anything
to him yet.
Don�t look at me like that.
I just�
I haven�t had a chance.
The right moment hasn�t come up.
Well, it�s never gonna be
the right moment.
You just have to do it.
Why is this so important to you?
Because it�s just I to see you
wasting your time pining.
That makes two of us and that�s
just a total waste of energy.
It�s-It�s just�complicated.
He�s a good friend and clich�
as this may sound
� it�s hard to cross that line.
If I say something and he doesn�t
feel the same way back,
it could get all weird between us
and our whole friendship
is gonna change.
Well, it already has � at least for you.
I mean the fact that you�re not
being honest with him right now
what kind of friendship is that?
And besides if you don�t tell him,
I�m gonna keep on flirting with you.
Jake�
Okay.
I�m going to retreat now
to the unrestricted zone.
Don�t be scared, Nin.
Just do it.
The first times always hurts but
it gets easier, I promise.
Oh maybe I�m not ready for this.
Well, maybe just try it one more time.
Amy, I�m leaving now.
I�ll be home on Monday.
You have Grandma�s number?
Oh my God, I think it�s stuck up
inside my eyeball.
Oh, let me see.
Let me see.
Oh yeah I see it.
It�s to the left.
Do you want me to grab it?
Are you sure you should
-be doing this?
-We�re fine, Mom.
I think I got it.
I think I got it.
-You sure?
-I got it.
I got it.
Mom, doesn�t Hannah look
good without her glasses?
Beautiful.
Stop it.
You girls have fun.
Bye.
I love you.
See you�re suffering now,
but it�s gonna be totally
worth it, I promise.
Like remember the first time
you shaved your legs
� completely traumatic, but
not it�s like nothing.
No, it�s still traumatic.
So is Bright home?
He�s, uh, working the restaurant
today, I think.
Why?
Curious.
What?
Okay, I don�t want to sound like
I hate my brother right now,
because I don�t,
but you can�t like him.
You think he�s out of my league.
No, it�s just better to be on
the same level as the person you like
in terms of experience.
How far have you gone?
Oh come on.
It�s not like I�m the queen of
experience either.
Trust me.
Uh, I�ve never kissed a guy.
Okay.
Now you see Bright is at the other end
of the fooling around spectrum.
I mean there�s a huge gap between
someone whose never kissed a guy
and someone who's been
with half of County.
It�s like he�s Tiger Woods and you�re
playing miniature golf.
Only I�ve never even held a club.
It�s not all about
how far you�ve gone.
It has a lot to do with attitude too.
I mean, Ephram and I, we take
these things very seriously.
We�re comfortable talking about them.
Bright doesn�t take anything
seriously at all.
Do you really want your first kiss
to be with someone like that?
Maybe.
Hannah, no.
Oh my gosh, just forget about
my brother and I promise
that I will make it my mission
to find you someone better.
And besides with those
new contact lenses,
I�m not even gonna have to try.
Okay.
So when�s he getting home?
Are we alone?
Well, Dr.
Abbott left an hour ago
if that�s who you�re referring to
unless it�s Louise that
you�re worried about.
Ah, she�s pretty scrappy,
but I think I can take her.
So, hey.
Uh, I just wanted
to run something by you.
How�s Edna doing?
Uh, great.
She�s-she�s been great.
Has she made you her famous
spiced cider yet?
I can�t say that I�ve had
the cider.
No.
Oh, that�s too bad.
It�s terrific.
You know she mills the spices herself.
Look a boy � a senior, 17 years old �
came into my office
today for an STD test.
Okay.
Okay and I�m sure it�s different in L.
A.
I�m- I�m just curious as to how
it works here in Everwood.
Do you give them free contraceptives?
It�s your call, Doctor.
You do
whatever you want to do.
Well, yes, but since
the kid�s a minor.
I mean do you notify the parent.
Parent or parents?
Actually I think he�s being
raised by a single dad.
Well, in that case, I would,
uh, talk to him,
make sure that he�s
being safe and if anything
abnormal showed up in the tests�
No, I don�t-I don�t think
that�s the issue here.
I think he�s just doing them as a
precaution y�know - before.
Right.
Well, it seems like you�re
covering all your bases.
Okay.
Good.
I was just trying to do the
right thing here, y�know.
Don�t want to make any more
rookie mistakes in this town.
Thanks, Andy.
Coming.
Ah, Dr.
Brown.
Come in.
Come in.
Your timing is impeccable.
Debra Winger�s just been
diagnosed with a malignant tumor.
Another serving
of shells and cheese
is simmering on the stovetop.
No thanks.
I just ate.
Suit yourself.
Harold, listen.
Uh�
You know I have to tell you
this whole bachelorhood thing
is not at all intolerable.
Do you realize I have serving
utensils sitting in the sink unrinsed.
Unrinsed.
Now do you have any idea
what kind of freedom that is?
Ephram and Amy are
going to have sex.
What?
Jake came by my office after work today.
Apparently Ephram went to
see him for an STD test
� just as a precaution
be-before they�
Before they�
Well, I�m assuming it
hasn�t happened yet �
at least that�s what he thought.
Jake told you this.
In a roundabout way, yes.
And believe me the irony
did not go unnoticed.
It made me feel kind of bad
about last year with Amy.
But listen that�s not
important.
The point is�
The point is they�re going to have sex.
Looks like it yes.
But how? How did this happen?
Well, they�re both seniors in high school.
They�re going off
to college next year,
it�s not that unusual.
Ephram�s already had sex
so he�s probably overready.
Do you think he�s pressuring her?
No, I don�t think that
and you don�t think that.
I think my macaroni and cheese
is coming back on me.
That�s what I think.
My God, whatever happened
to good old-fashioned handholding.
A chaste kiss on the cheek in
the presence of a chaperone.
I don�t know, Harold, maybe they went the
way of the poodle skirt.
And you have to go ahead and
built that soundproof garage for Ephram.
Why not just buy them
their very own Motel 6?
Oh, calm down, Harold.
The reason I came here
-is that so that you and I�
-Oh don�t tell me to calm down, Andy.
My daughter�s about to be deflowered
by Supersperm over there.
I�m not supposed
to have a reaction?
You don�t understand.
Of course I understand.
Ephram�s my son.
I�m just as upset about this as you are.
No, you�re not.
It�s not
the same with boys.
I had the talk with Bright last year.
It lasted all of 15 minutes and
I never even thought about it again.
Amy�
Amy, she�s my little
girl.
It�s different, Andy.
You�ll see in 10 years time
when you�re having this
conversation with Delia
� get back to me.
You�re right.
I probably wouldn�t�ve given
this a second thought if
everything hadn�t�ve
happened last year with�
With Madison.
I know.
Listen, I�ll talk to him.
Maybe I - Maybe I can convince him
to hold off for awhile.
And I�ll talk to Amy too.
Perhaps I�ll.
Oh God,
Rose is out of town all
weekend visiting that
wretched mother of hers.
Do you think this
can wait until Monday?
Well, we can wait.
The question
is can they wait?
Welcome to bachelorhood, Harold.
Andy?
Hmm.
Do you have any idea what
you�re going to say?
Nope.
You?
No Not whatsoever.
You in the middle of something?
Not anymore.
What�s up?
I want to talk to you about sex.
Well, I don�t know how much pot
you smoked in the 60s,
but we had this conversation
already last year.
I know that.
We gonna have it again with every girl
I date until I�m married.
Hopefully, this will be my swan song.
But this one�s a little different.
This time I�m going to tell you that
I don�t think you should�
have sex�
with Amy.
That was supposed
to be a complete sentence.
Are you forbidding it?
Obviously, I can�t control
the decisions that you make
but I-I would appreciate it
if you would hear me out.
I know that you
and Amy are in love
and I know that that feeling
is very powerful.
It makes you want to push
the relationship forward,
but I would like you to think about
how it was for you
with Madison last year.
How did you know that
I had sex with Madison?
Because at some point
the relationship deepened.
It changed.
You changed and I saw it happen.
And I want you to think about
how you felt after it happened
and multiply those feelings by a thousand
and that�s how it�s going to be for Amy.
Yeah, I hear you and
if-if I didn�t think that
I was in this for the long haul,
then I might agree.
That�s just it.
You are in it
for the long haul.
I can see that.
Which is why you can
afford to take your time.
I mean, how�s it going for
you two right now?
Great.
We�re the best
we�ve ever been.
Well, sex changes that.
Forever.
Dynamics � the focus
of the relationship.
I mean, you two have worked
so hard for so long to be
together and to be happy.
You willing to risk that?
Not when you put it like that.
Look, I know that sex has a way
of feeling like the prize
especially at your age
and I understand.
All I�m asking for you to do
is just take your time.
I just want you to, uh, enjoy
getting to that.
It�s worth it.
-Impressive.
-Yeah?
Yeah, I mean, definitely one
of your better ones.
It hasn�t come yet, but, uh, y�know,
if it does I�ll be
sure to think about it.
Crudit�s?
What is all of this?
High tea.
Try this spread.
It�s wonderful.
No, I�m good.
Dad, you realize the last time
we had a tea party I was like four.
Yes.
Yes.
And do you remember those tea parties?
How we used to make those little
cakes in your Easy Bake Oven.
Those were delicious weren�t they?
Umm, yeah.
Yes, but remember how
we took them out prematurely.
They wouldn�t be ready.
Hmm? Because, Honey,
it wasn�t time yet.
I�m-I�m talking about sex, Amy.
I know that you and Ephram
have discussed it.
What? No.
N-No we haven�t.
-Of course you have.
-No we haven�t, Dad.
Come now, we should be able
to engage in an honest discourse
on the subject without falling prey
to the typical flusterings.
I am a hip dad.
For the record, you can�t say
that you�re hip.
It kind of goes against
actually being hip.
Is Mom home yet?
Oh we do not need your mother.
Here, have a scone.
Listen to me.
-Dad�
-Just
I know that you and Ephram
aren�t kids anymore.
You�re teenagers with all of those
hormones coursing through your bodies.
Why wouldn�t you be
thinking about sex?
Cause it�s not that I�m not
thinking about it.
I�m just�
Oh, Honey, it�s only natural.
With the media bombarding
you with
suggestive imagery
every chance it gets
not to mention those
Victoria�s Secret commercials,
which leave very little
to the imagination.
And I�m sure that many of your peers
are even trying it out.
Yeah, some of �em.
Lots of �em.
And I�m assuming that
you�re still on the pill.
Yes, but only because Aunt Linda said
it wasn�t good to go on and off of it
so I just stayed on.
Unless maybe subconsciously
I stayed on for Ephram and I.
You probably did.
Because you wanted your first time
to be with someone that
you�re in love with
and you felt comfortable with.
Yes, that�s true.
See I understand these things.
Maybe you�re right.
Maybe I�ve just avoided talking
with Ephram about this because I�m�
I don�t know, scared of my sexuality.
No.
Wh-What�s that now? You�
Dad, you�re probably dead on.
I�m probably a lot closer to this
than I thought.
Maybe it is time I start talking
to Ephram about this stuff.
Wait, so you truly
have not actually�?
Dad, this is fantastic.
You really clarified a lot
of stuff for me.
And you were right, we didn�t need
Mom at all for this.
Hannah.
Hey, uh,
we don�t open until 5:30.
Yeah, I know, I�m actually
not here to eat.
I can�t remember if I told you or not
but I�m living at Nina�s
and she�s got a whole other person
to feed now that I�m there
and, uh, she�s so hard
already so I was thinking
maybe I could help her out
and I know that you really seem
to enjoy working here so.
What, you want a job?
Yeah.
Are you okay? Do you have
something in your eye?
No.
Well, technically yes.
I�m just having
some blinking issues.
Oh, so listen my manager�s not here right
now and I�m on the clock so�
Uh, okay.
But, uh, I can get you an application
if you just hang for a little while.
I�ve got to do a few things.
Sure, I can hang.
All right.
You�re really good at that.
Setting up really fast.
Ehh.
I don�t think about it anymore.
You get used to it, y�know.
Well, it�s obvious you�re a natural.
Really coordinated and everything.
Uh, so you want some
restaurant lingo
so when you sit down with Mikey
you�ll sound more professional.
Sure.
This what I�m doing right here�
Umm, hmm.
It�s called marrying the ketchups.
Because you�re marrying two ketchups?
Exactly.
Do you Mr.
Heinz
take you, Miss,
uh, Generic Tomato Paste to be
your lawfully wedded wife? I do.
There must be a lot of inbreeding, huh?
They�re both ketchups.
Y�know, they�re keeping
it in the family.
I�m sorry that was stupid.
Oh, no.
No, I get it.
It took me awhile.
I like it.
Twisted.
-Thanks.
-Yeah
Gotta got that Ephram
smart thing going on.
So, uh, what are you doing right now?
Now?
�Cause I am off.
I was thinking about going
to grab a movie.
Wanna come?
Yeah, uh, yeah.
I can definitely
come.
Sure.
Then let�*** it.
Okay.
Oh, wait a minute.
You wanted that
application, right?
Right, yes.
One second.
Hello? Andy?
Nina, there�s my lovely
next door neighbor.
You know what you are looking at.
You are looking at one hell
of a father-son communicator.
Is that so?
Umm, hmm.
I had a very nice chat with
Ephram this morning and, uh,
let�s just say that I was
extremely effective.
That sounds like a good enough
reason for a night on the town,
which is why I came by.
Oh?
Well, I-I have a sitter for tonight.
She offered to work.
I think she was just looking for an excuse
to get away from her boyfriend
but I just heard about
this new topes place.
Sounds really good.
You get a
whole bunch of little tastes.
Oh very Spanish.
Sounds great.
What time should we go?
Uh, actually I made a reservation
for 8 o�clock, so uh?
A reservation?
Uh, yeah.
Wow, I haven�t heard that
term in over a year.
Must be pretty swanky.
Yeah, well, it�s just new.
So, uh, so I�ll come
by around 7:30.
Yeah, perfect.
Okay, see you at 7:30.
So, uh, I had sort of an interesting
conversation with my dad today.
Yeah?
Yeah, apparently he thinks
we�re having sex.
Or that we�re thinking
about it anyways?
That�s a little weird.
I had the exact same
conversation with my dad today.
Really.
I guess it�s in the air.
How long ago did you guys
have this talk?
A few hours ago.
The funny thing is he just
sort of assumed that
we�ve been thinking about it,
which-which I haven�t really,
but the fact that he was made me think
that maybe we should be.
Edna?
Ooh, I bring up sex and
you bring up my grandma.
Okay, so this is not a big deal so
don�t like freak out or anything,
but I went and, uh, saw
Dr.
Jake the other day,
just for, y�know, some routine
check-ups and stuff
and I decided that I should
probably get tested so I did
and Edna must�ve seen my chart
and told our dads
which is why we�re both
getting the talk.
Oh-Oh, wait, you went to get tested
for like *** and stuff.
Yeah, it seemed like the responsible
thing to do, so�
Why didn�t you tell me?
Uh, I don�t know.
I guess I thought that
they were my tests and
they didn�t really have
anything to do with you.
Okay?
I mean, I took the tests for you.
I just figured I�d wait until
I had a clean bill of health
before I got you involved.
That�s romantic.
Some girls get flowers
and I get test results.
No, I�m serious, Ephram,
the second that I started
thinking about this,
I talked to you about it
� like four minutes ago.
But not only did you
not talk to me about it,
you got a doctor�s appointment
and got blood taken and-and�
And you�re making this into a way bigger
deal than it needs to be, okay.
What the getting tested
or the having sex?
Either.
Both.
I mean, it doesn�t have
to be this massive.
Right, because you�re such an
experienced sex god that
our first time is just whatever.
B - But it�s not my first time.
But it�s OUR first time.
Thanks for reminding me
though because
you know you getting an
STD test wasn�t enough.
Amy?
Y�know what, Ephram,
it doesn�t even matter
because this whole thing just
made me realize that
we are not even close to being
ready anyways
Way to go, Dad, you almost
had me this time.
What are you talking about?
I know you know that I went
to get tested
which is why you gave me that load
of crap about holding off with Amy.
It�s not a load of crap.
Ah, as if you had no idea, as if
you�re just Mr.
Father Knows Best.
All right, I knew.
But you clearly didn�t
want to discuss it with me.
Y - You most of the time just say the
stupidest crap which really pisses me off,
but every once in awhile
you actually say something
that makes since like this morning,
I was actually thinking about
taking your advice.
Look the fact that I knew about
your doctor�s appointment
-doesn�t change our conversation.
-Yes, it does.
It completely does, because
it came from a totally false place.
Motivated by some personal
agenda which I don�t get.
Well, what don�t you get?
Why you care? Seriously, I�
Why are you jumping through hoops
trying to keep me from having sex?
Maybe if it was my first time
I get it, but it�s not.
Sex has been had so why are you
freaking out now?
Because�
With you and Amy, it�s-it�s-it�s
much more serious,
-that�s why I-I�
-I don�t care.
All right, forget it.
Hey.
Yeah, if I want to have sex,
I�m gonna have sex
and I�m not gonna
talk to you about it.
I�ll just cancel that reservation.
Amy.
Hi, Grandma.
You totally
ruined my life.
Well, this should be fun.
I mean, it is obviously
not all your fault
I just don�t understand
why you would go to my dad
instead of coming to me,
especially after everything
we went through last year.
Come to you about what?
You�re making me dizzy, Private.
I know that you know that Ephram
went to get an STD test from Dr.
Jake
and I know that you told my dad
who told Dr.
Brown
or you told Dr.
Brown
who told my dad.
I�m not quite sure
of the order here.
Okay.
The point is now
the entire population of
Everwood knows that Ephram
wanted to have sex
with me except for me.
So you didn�t know
he was getting tested?
NO!
Okay.
Okay.
I�m just trying to break this
down to basics.
So you�re upset that
Ephram didn�t tell you?
I�m upset because�
Because this whole thing
is just embarrassing.
Partying in a public restroom
is embarrassing.
That�s not what�s got you bugged.
So if you�re gonna throw a hissy fit
at me at least me honest.
I feel like an idiot.
I-I-I�ve just been
trying to convince myself
that Ephram and I are
on the same page with this stuff
� sex and everything.
I mean, I-I knew that
he slept with Madison.
He told me that but I just
thought that maybe if I
didn�t think about that,
that I could pretend
like it didn�t happen.
Why does it matter
that it happened?
Because how am I gonna
live up to that?
What?
Oh, Amy.
Oh, Grandma, try to be a little
unbiased here, seriously.
I mean, the girl�s like
four years older than me.
Clearly way more experienced.
A helluva lot prettier.
Now watch it.
That�s my favorite
granddaughter, you�re insulting.
I�m serious though.
I mean, I just try to imagine
that Ephram and I
were in the same universe
and the bottom line is we�re not.
You�re in love.
That�s the only universe that counts.
Listen to me,
sex isn�t just an act
you learn how to do once.
It�s different with every person
and-and every time you embark
on that journey with
someone new it�s scary.
No matter how many times
you�ve done it before.
Heck, the first time Irv and I�
Ooh, Grandma, no.
Sorry.
But you get what I�m saying.
It�s all right to be afraid or nervous.
It just means it�s important to you.
Yeah, I guess I don�t
fully believe you yet, but
I appreciate the thought.
Thank you.
Edna?
You ever discuss a patient�s business
outside the office again,
you�ll be begging for a court marshal.
-How did you find out?
-I�m a God,
that�s how.
I know all.
The kid is a minor and
to tell you the truth he
looked kind of freaked out
sitting in my office all by himself.
If I were his parent
I would want to know.
You don�t get to make that call.
-What you did was unprofessional.
-If you�re talking confidentiality
I didn�t mention
his name � not once.
And I gotta say
I-I still don�t know how you�
Pay attention, because
it might be complicated
for your California pea-sized
brain to understand.
Ephram Brown, son of Dr.
Brown,
goes out with Amy Abbott,
daughter of Dr.
Abbott,
who happens to be my son,
which makes her my granddaughter.
Wow, it�s like a Greek play.
That�s right.
So if you ever do
anything like this again,
I�ll buy a broach and
stab you in the eyes myself.
Hey, Edna.
How come you never make
me your spiced cider?
So how are you liking this place?
Nina treating you all right?
Yeah, Nina�s great.
I�ve met
a lot of really nice people.
You mean my sister and
her permanent appendage.
And you?
So hey, good luck that application.
If you need any help with
the restaurant lingo, give me a buzz.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh.
I�m sorry, did I lean in wrong?
No.
No.
It�s just, uh, this-this isn�t
that kind of night, Hannah?
I know, I�m trying to make it
that kind of night.
I like you, Bright.
Yeah, I know.
I kind of figured
that out from before.
Oh.
Okay.
Hey, look, I�m sorry.
I hope I didn�t lead
you on or anything.
Sorry.
No.
No.
No, you didn�t.
It�s fine.
Although, actually you kinda did.
I mean if you knew that I�
Why would you do all that stuff?
We just went to the movies, Hannah.
It�s not like I tried
to rip your shirt off.
No.
No.
Hey.
Lo-Lo-Look,
hey, you're right,
I flirted, but I-I don�t know why,
it�s just a natural reflex with me and�
And what?
And I don�t know, I guess part of me
liked having the company.
Uh, I mean, look I�m really
messed up right now.
I� My life is nothing
like how I pictured it.
Y�know, all my friends are off
to college and Ephram,
he�s my best friend, we�re not
even talking right now, y�know.
You coming in the restaurant today,
I mean, you were looking up to me
and treating me like a
- movie star or something.
-Oh, God.
It felt good.
I haven�t felt like
that in a long time.
Maybe you don�t deserve to.
It�s like every time we
take two steps forward,
we-we�re taking thirty steps back.
Oh, I�m sure it�s not that bad.
Maybe 29 steps tops.
I�m sorry.
Obviously, it doesn�t matter.
He�s gonna do what he wants to do.
There�s nothing I can do about it.
There was never anything
you could�ve done about it.
I mean, I�m sure that
it was helluva speech,
but you didn�t really think that
you were gonna stop them
from having sex, did you?
Why is that so crazy?
I mean, when did we get to this point
where kids just have sex
and we�re supposed
to be okay with it.
At least you know that Ephram
is being responsible
and you guys did cover
that stuff last year.
Please, last year I had
my head in the sand.
I was so busy trying to
be his friend, his buddy,
I think I actually told him
to go and have fun
if you can believe that.
Well, it doesn�t sound like
the worst advice.
Trust me, it is.
You know, you can only pull off that
friend routine for so long
before being a parent
catches up with you
and you start to think about the ten
million things that could go wrong.
But you can�t think about that stuff.
I mean, you can,
but it�ll just drive you nuts.
If I worried about
every possible concussion
Sam might get when he
hits the monkey bars,
I�d go insane.
Well, monkey bars are very dangerous too.
Nina, I could tell you stories.
Please don�t.
But that�s the thing, Andy, there-
-there comes a point where
you just have to trust your kid
and have faith in the universe
they�re gonna be okay.
Yeah, well, I don�t have
that kind of faith.
Well, I do.
And I keep a little extra
for you so don�t worry okay.
I don�t know what I�d do
without you, Nina.
I really don�t.
Look at you in that outfit;
I can�t believe I messed up
your evening tonight.
Ah, it�s okay.
I can always
wear it again.
Yeah, but you look so pretty.
And I could�ve been
your wingman tonight,
I mean, I bet there are thousands
of single guys at that place.
Well, y�know what,
I�ll make it up to you.
Take a rain check okay?
Sure.
Rain check.
Hey, Bright.
Look, I already know, okay.
So don�t bothering laying into me.
You can�t make me feel
any worse than I already do.
Umm, hello, guilty conscious.
I just came to tell you that I took
the trash out so you don�t have to.
Oh.
Thanks.
So what�d you do?
Nothing.
Get into another fight with Dad?
Mom?
Ephram?
Look, I�m not gonna talk
to you about this, okay.
So go.
Okay.
Fine.
I don�t really
have the head space
to listen to what you have
to say anyways.
Good.
But let me just give you
two seconds of advice.
No, I�m serious and this is coming
from a girl whose done therapy,
yoga and antidepressants,
so I know what I�m talking about.
You can�t keep shutting
people out, Bright.
I mean, I know you think you can,
because you think that you�ll keep finding
new doors to open,
but the fact is they�re not there.
There actually are a limited
number of doors
and an extremely limited
number of great people
who really really care
so just work it out with whoever.
If there�s a thousand people pissed
at you, then just start with one.
And start soon, because
it�s really hard losing people.
It�s even harder getting them back.
That�s it.
Hannah, I think I am going
to take that luan back.
Honey, is something wrong?
No.
No.
I�m fine.
Something happen at home.
Did your mom call?
Oh, no, it�s� It�s nothing.
It�s just stupid boy stuff.
Well, there�s nothing
stupid about boy stuff.
You know how they say if you
put yourself out there
like really risk something
� like your heart or something �
that it�s supposed to work out.
Who says that?
You know, movies,
Shakespeare.
Oh, right.
Yeah, well, it�s definitely not true.
And personally I think that
it is a very bad idea
� putting yourself out there like unwise.
So, I�m guessing that you put
your heart on the line
and you didn�t get the outcome
you were hoping for.
I just thought y�know, if I�
if I got contact lenses and did
my hair the right way that�
maybe I�d be that girl that
guys like back,
but I�m not that girl.
I�m never gonna be that girl.
And I never should�ve
told him that I liked him.
Him who?
Never mind, it doesn�t matter.
But, honey, there�s nothing
wrong with what you did.
Yes, there is, because
he doesn�t like me back
and now I just look like
this enormous idiot.
No you don�t.
Actually, you look incredibly
brave to me.
It takes guts to tell someone
how you feel about them.
And you know what, it almost
doesn�t matter what they say back.
Just the fact that you had
the courage to say it that means
that you are the kind of
girl that gets the guy.
-No, it�s not.
-Not all the guys
� the right guy �
the one whose gonna
appreciate how rare you are.
It�s just I liked liking him.
It was fun to think about him.
It was a fun dream to go to
sleep to, y�know.
I guess false hope is better
than no hope at all, right?
Shakespeare � what a hack?
Yep, I say that we skip dinner
tonight and go straight to dessert.
What do ya think?
I like it.
Oh.
I almost forgot.
Somebody left this by
the front door.
I assume it�s for you.
Ketchup children.
What does that mean?
Consolation prize.
You know, these
crumpets are delicious.
I�ve never actually had a crumpet.
Hear me out, Brown.
I�ve researched thoroughly
several well-respected programs
accept new students
at the semester break.
Andover for one is
an exceptional music program.
-I don�t think that�s the answer.
-Okay, option two.
We devise a system
whereby at no time
these two are left unsupervised.
Did you know there is
a Low jack device
specifically designed for people?
People on parole from prison.
But the technology exists.
We decide how to use it.
It�s over, isn�t it?
Not necessarily.
They�re teenagers.
There�s a very good
chance they�ll screw
this relationship up before
they even get to the sex.
Here�s to praying.
Hello, anybody home.
Rose?
Harold?
Thank God.
Never
leave me alone again.
Oh, it�s good to see you too, dear.
We need to buy locks, Rose.
Lots of locks and a security system,
preferably something
with a motion detector.
Was there a break in?
Not yet.
-Hi, Rose.
Welcome back.
-Oh, Dr.
Brown.
I don�t know what we have
in the way of food,
but you�re welcome
to stay for dinner.
No.
No, I�m fine.
I�ll see you tomorrow, Harold.
Yes.
Yes, Let me tell you, Rose.
You can not imagine the type
of weekend that I�ve had.
Oh, well, let me tell you my mother
was in fine form as well.
You know if we went
to see another movie,
we could spend another
two hours avoiding a conversation.
Yeah, I was thinking a triple feature.
It could be like the whole
week never happened.
No, I�m glad this week happened, Ephram.
I�m necessarily a fan
of how it happened, just�
Pick a hand.
What?
Pick a hand.
That one.
What is this? An apology letter,
how very formal of you.
Your test results.
I wanted to try to make them
as romantic as possible.
Y�know, pretty street, starry night.
And you�re clean.
Yeah, that wasn�t supposed
to be a surprise.
Look, Amy, I need you to know
that if, y�know, we do.
I mean, it�s gonna be
a-a big deal for me as well.
It�s not something
I�m- I�m gonna take lightly,
because you�re not somebody
I take lightly.
I know.
You, uh, you want to see
what was in my other hand?
Oh my God.
I was, uh, I was actually, uh, looking
to try and find you a bracelet
but then I saw this and it just
reminded me of you.
The circle � it�s like infinite �
it�s kinda how I feel about us, so�
I�m � I�m shocked.
Here.
Allow me.
It�s beautiful.
Well, I guess it�s a good thing
I stayed on the pill.
Y - You are?
Since when?
Last year.
For Tommy.
You went on the pill for that creep?
Yeah.
So?
I mean, you knew that when you went on the
pill nothing was gonna happen, right?
Are you feeling threatened?
No.
You�re feeling threatened.
Script: Rosemary
Srt: Juanfran