Taking Life by The Ears, Nose & Throat

Mike: WELCOME TO THE WEIRD WORLD OF "ODDITIES." I WANT TO BUY SOMETHING MEDICAL FOR A DOCTOR. HE'S A EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT GUY. SO YOU WANT TO SURPRISE HIM WITH A -- WITH AN EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT. THERE'S SEVERAL THINGS HERE. Mike: WHAT'S THAT PIECE THERE? THAT'S INTERESTING. Evan: WHAT IS THAT THING? [ GASPS ] [ Chuckling ] OH, MAN! NOW, WHAT I'M GOING TO DO IS, I'M GOING TO PLACE MY TONGUE ONTO THIS TRAP. [ Muffled ] A ONE... A TWO... THREE! AH! Mike: OBSCURA AIN'T YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S ANTIQUE SHOP. WHOA! WELL, UNLESS YOUR GRANDMA'S A BIT OF A KOOK. IS THAT A STRAITJACKET? I'M MIKE. Evan: AND I'M EVAN. Both: WE'VE SPENT OUR ENTIRE LIVES... HUNTING AND PICKING... TO GET THIS BUSINESS... DOWN TO A SCIENCE. THIS IS "ODDITIES." -- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS HELLO. HI. ASK IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS. OKAY, THANKS. I LOVE YOUR EARS. DID YOU HAVE THEM SURGICALLY DONE, OR ARE THOSE PROSTHESES? THANKS. NO, THEY'RE PROSTHETIC. I CAN'T AFFORD PLASTIC SURGERY. I'M JUST OBSESSED WITH TOLKIEN AND ELVES, OH, THEY SUIT YOU. THANKS. I DESCRIBE MYSELF AS AN URBAN ELF. I'VE BEEN WEARING ELF EARS FOR ABOUT 20 YEARS NOW. I HAVE NO IDEA WHY. I THINK I JUST WATCHED "THE DARK CRYSTAL" TOO MANY TIMES AND THOUGHT, "I BET THAT WOULD LOOK GOOD." ANYTHING IN PARTICULAR YOU'RE LOOKING FOR? ACTUALLY, I'M KIND OF CURIOUS ABOUT THIS OUIJA BOARD. OH, YEAH. THAT'S AN INTERESTING ONE -- 1940s. IT'S A HASKO MYSTIC OUIJA BOARD. ARE YOU TRYING TO CONTACT SOMEONE ON THE OTHER SIDE? WELL, I ACTUALLY ALREADY HAVE TWO OUIJA BOARDS. ONE IS A BARBIE OUIJA BOARD AND THE OTHER IS GLOW-IN-THE-DARK. BUT I WROTE A HORROR FILM CALLED "SATAN'S ***"... UH-HUH. ...AND I NEED A OUIJA BOARD AS A PROP. THE MOVIE'S A BIT OF A COMEDY. SO, THESE TEENAGERS ARE TRYING TO SUMMON SATAN BECAUSE THEY'RE IN A ROCK BAND AND THEY'RE HOPING TO CUT A RECORD DEAL AND THEY THINK THAT IF THEY MAKE A PACT WITH SATAN, THEY'LL BE ABLE TO DO THAT. AND THEN THEY FINALLY DO SUMMON SATAN, AND HE'S MUCH LESS COOL THAN THEY EVER IMAGINED. WELL, I HAVE TO TELL YOU, OF ALL THE THINGS WE'VE EVER HAD, OUIJA BOARDS FREAK PEOPLE OUT THE MOST 'CAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THAT THE SPIRIT'S STILL TRAPPED IN THERE SOMEHOW AND THEY'RE GONNA TAKE IT HOME AND THE SPIRIT'S GONNA COME OUT AND WREAK HAVOC. THE WAY A OUIJA BOARD ACTUALLY WORKS -- PARTICIPANTS LIGHTLY PLACE THEIR HANDS ON THE PLANCHETTE, ASK QUESTIONS ALOUD, AND THE PIECE MOVES OVER THE BOARD'S NUMBERS AND LETTERS TO SPELL OUT THE ANSWERS. TODAY, OUIJA BOARDS ARE MARKETED AS TOYS, BUT IN THE 19th CENTURY, WHEN SPIRITUALISM WAS SWEEPING THE GLOBE, THEY WERE CONSIDERED AN EFFECTIVE WAY TO CONTACT THE DEAD. SEANCES WERE VERY POPULAR WITH HIGH-POWERED PUBLIC FIGURES AND POLITICIANS, LIKE ABRAHAM LINCOLN. I LOVE THIS, BUT THIS DOESN'T REALLY SCREAM HORROR TO ME. IT LOOKS MORE LIKE 1960s TV SHOW. WELL, WE DO HAVE ONE OTHER ONE. I HAVE IT IN THE BACK. IT'S AS OUIJA AS IT GETS. OOH, NICE. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. OKAY. WELL, HERE IT IS. THIS IS ACTUALLY THE FIRST COMMERCIALLY-PRODUCED OUIJA BOARD EVER -- 1891. YEAH, THAT'S DEFINITELY THE SCARIEST OUIJA BOARD I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. THE WEIRD THING ABOUT OUIJA BOARDS IS HOW THEY ACTUALLY WORK. IT'S ATTRIBUTED TO SOMETHING CALLED THE IDEOMOTOR EFFECT, IN WHICH THOUGHTS IN THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND ACTUALLY CAUSE THE BODY TO MAKE REFLEXIVE MOTIONS. IN OTHER WORDS, IF YOU THINK ABOUT SOMETHING, YOUR BODY WILL DO IT. DO YOU THINK THIS WOULD READ WELL IN YOUR MOVIE? YEAH, IT DEFINITELY WOULD MAKE ITS PRESENCE KNOWN. RIGHT, WELL, I GUESS I COULD FLIP IT FOR LIKE $250. IT'S GORGEOUS. I THINK $250 IS MORE THAN REASONABLE. YEAH? SO YOU GONNA TAKE IT? ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL. HOW YOU DOING? HI. FEEL FREE TO HAVE A LOOK AROUND. I WILL. ANYTHING IN PARTICULAR YOU'RE LOOKING FOR TODAY? AS A MATTER OF FACT, I AM. I WANT TO BUY SOMETHING MEDICAL FOR A DOCTOR. HE WAS MY SURGEON. I HAD CANCER 10 YEARS AGO, AND HE SUCCESSFULLY TOOK IT OUT AND HAS BEEN WATCHING OVER ME FOR A BUNCH OF YEARS. HE'S A OTOLARYNGOLOGIST. EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT GUY. AH, OKAY. SO, ANYWAY, I WANTED TO THANK HIM... ...WITH A BIZARRO GIFT. SO YOU WANT TO SURPRISE HIM WITH A -- WITH AN EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT IF WE CAN. I'M 10 YEARS AWAY FROM A BOUT OF CANCER. AND OVER THE LAST DECADE, THE SURGEON HAS TAKEN CARE OF ME, AND I KIND OF WANT TO BUY HIM SOMETHING MEDICALLY-RELATED AS A THANK YOU FOR HIS GOOD DOCTORING. WELL, DO YOU WANT A WET SPECIMEN? YOU WANT SOMETHING ACTUALLY PREPARED, A MODEL? YEAH. ALL OF THE ABOVE. WHATEVER YOU CAN COME UP WITH, I WOULD LIKE TO LOOK AT. THERE'S SOMETHING, ACTUALLY, WE JUST BROUGHT IT IN. YEAH, PLEASE, SURE. OKAY. WE HAVE THIS LARGE EAR MODEL. OH, MY GOD. IT'S NOT WHAT I EXPECTED AT ALL. YEAH, THIS ONE'S HOLLOW. OH, YEAH, LET'S SEE WHAT'S INSIDE. IT IS ACTUALLY FAIRLY COMPLETE, WHICH IS WHAT'S NICE ABOUT THIS ONE. THIS PIECE HERE -- IT'S THE EUSTACHIAN TUBE. WHEN YOUR EARS POP, THAT'S YOUR EUSTACHIAN TUBE OPENING UP, ALLOWING AIR TO PASS, AND IT EQUALIZES THE PRESSURE IN AND OUTSIDE OF YOUR EAR. AND HERE'S MY FAVORITE PART OF THE MODEL -- THE TYMPANIC MEMBRANE, OR EARDRUM. WHAT HAPPENS IS, WHEN SOUND HITS YOUR EAR, IT PHYSICALLY MOVES THE TYMPANIC MEMBRANE, WHICH TRANSMITS THAT TO THESE TINY, TINY BONES. IT'S GREAT. THE SOUNDS THEN PASS INTO THE COCHLEA. THOSE VIBRATIONS GO DOWN THIS NERVE RIGHT INTO THE BRAIN, WHERE THEY'RE PROCESSED TO SOUND. THE WONDERFUL COMPLEXITY OF NATURE. YEAH. IT'S REALLY GREAT. SO, HOW MUCH ARE YOU ASKING FOR THIS? WE'RE ASKING $450 FOR IT. OKAY. WELL, AT LEAST WE HAVE THE EAR COVERED. I WAS OPEN TO ANYTHING, SO THIS IS A GREAT START. SO, AS FAR AS BUDGET GOES, WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN MIND? WELL, I'M NOT A WEALTHY MAN. [ BOTH CHUCKLE ] BUT IT'S A 10-YEAR ANNIVERSARY, IT'S A REALLY, YOU KNOW, BIG MILESTONE, SO, YOU KNOW, SEE WHAT YOU CAN COME UP WITH. OKAY, WELL, YOU GOT YOURSELF AN EAR, ANYWAY. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. IT'S REALLY A WONDERFUL PIECE. ONE DOWN, TWO TO GO. WE ACTUALLY DO HAVE ONE PIECE THAT MIGHT POSSIBLY WORK FOR YOU. THIS IS USED TO OPEN UP YOUR CHEST CAVITY. OH, MY GOD. Evan: OH, WOW. Mike: WE HAVE A CUSTOMER THAT'S LOOKING FOR A GIFT FOR HIS EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT DOCTOR. I ACTUALLY MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING RIGHT OVER THERE. OH. [ LAUGHTER ] WOW. Mike: THIS IS "ODDITIES." A CUSTOMER OF OURS IS LOOKING FOR SOME UNUSUAL THANK-YOU GIFTS TO PRESENT TO HIS CANCER SURGEON. HE'S LOOKING FOR AN EAR, A NOSE, AND A THROAT. WELL, WE'VE GOT THE EAR, SO NOW WE'RE ON THE HUNT FOR THE NOSE AND THROAT. Mike: HEY, WREN. HOW YOU DOING? Wren: HEY, GUYS, COME ON IN. OH, WOW. IT'S JUST PERFECT. YOU HAVE THE BEST EYE. THANK YOU. VERY, VERY NICE. YEAH, IT'S JUST, EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK, IT'S JUST MORE AND MORE AND -- OH, YEAH, I'VE BEEN COLLECTING SINCE I WAS YOUNG, AND SOME OF THE STUFF I HAVE ACTUALLY HAD SINCE I WAS A TEENAGER. YEAH. I DO JEWELRY AND ACCESSORY DESIGN, USING ANTIQUE DOLL PARTS, PROSTHETIC LIMBS, ANIMAL BONES, A LOT OF NATURAL ITEMS. WE HAVE A CUSTOMER THAT'S LOOKING FOR A GIFT FOR HIS EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT DOCTOR. WE'RE LOOKING FOR A NOSE AND A THROAT. I ACTUALLY MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING THAT YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN. IT'S ACTUALLY RIGHT OVER THERE IN THAT GLASS BOX. YEAH, DOWN THERE. OH. [ LAUGHTER ] THAT -- THAT IS A NOSE. YEAH, YEAH. THAT'S AN IMPRESSIVE NOSE. OH, DEFINITELY. LOOK AT THOSE NOSTRILS. YEAH, THEY'RE QUITE IMPRESSIVE. WHERE ON EARTH DID YOU FIND THIS? AT A FLEA MARKET. THE GENTLEMAN I BOUGHT IT FROM HAD MORTICIAN STUFF. IT LOOKS LIKE ONE OF THOSE POSTMORTEM PROSTHETICS FOR WHEN THEY'RE DOING AN OPEN-CASKET FUNERAL AND THE FACE HAS BEEN DEFORMED AND THEY TRY TO SORT OF RECREATE THE FACE POST-MORTEM. RIGHT. IT ALSO REMINDS YOU A LITTLE BIT OF THE MODERN PROSTHETICS. ORIGINALLY, THEY WOULD GLUE THEM ON WITH GLUE MATERIAL, BUT NOW WHAT THEY DO IS, THEY ACTUALLY HAVE MAGNETS APPLIED TO THEM AND THEY'LL IMPLANT A MAGNET INTO YOUR BONE AND THE THING WILL JUST SNAP RIGHT ON. YEAH, YOU JUST POP IT ON. AND THEN YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR NOSE DEPENDING ON YOUR MOOD. EXACTLY. [ CHUCKLES ] SO, WOULD THIS BE AVAILABLE? YEAH, I'M DEFINITELY WILLING TO PART WITH THAT. YEAH. HOW MUCH FOR JUST THE NOSE? I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE LIKE $25. OH. I THINK THAT TOTALLY WORKS. YEAH. NO PROBLEM. HELLO. HOW YOU DOING? LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT ANYTHING. SURE, SURE, SURE. THAT'S A NEAT HAT YOU HAVE THERE. IS THAT A RACCOON TAIL? YEAH, YEAH. I GAVE SOME ROADKILL A HOME. [ LAUGHS ] I'M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING THAT EXPLORES THE THRESHOLDS OF PAIN. OKAY, SO THINGS THAT, WHAT, LIKE, LOOK SCARY? OR THINGS THAT YOU WOULD USE TO HURT YOURSELF? ALL OF THE ABOVE. OKAY. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH THIS PIECE? I'M A SIDESHOW PERFORMER AND WE DO WORKING ACTS. WHAT KIND OF WORKING ACTS DO YOU SHOWCASE? I DID BRING SOMETHING WITH ME. I CAN ACTUALLY SHOW YOU. DO YOU HAVE A STRONG STOMACH? FAIRLY. OKAY, THIS MIGHT WORK OUT. SO, WHAT I HAVE IN MY POCKET IS SOMETHING THAT WE USE IN OUR SHOW. IT'S CALLED A MOUSETRAP. WHAT I WOULD LIKE YOU TO DO IS JUST PLACE YOUR LITTLE PINKY RIGHT THERE. ACTUALLY, I'D RATHER NOT. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I'LL DO. HOW ABOUT IF I PLACE MY TONGUE INTO THIS TRAP? I'D ALSO PREFER IF YOU DIDN'T DO THAT, BUT I CAN TELL JUST LOOKING IN YOUR EYES I'VE GOT TO DO IT. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS HOLD DOWN ON THE BUSINESS END OF THIS TRAP. OKAY. NOW, WHAT I'M GONNA ASK YOU TO DO IS TAKE A KNEE. LIKE I'M OFFERING YOU THIS TRAP? EXACTLY. NOW, WHAT I'M GOING TO DO IS, I'M GOING TO PLACE MY TONGUE ONTO THIS TRAP. YOUR JOB IS TO RELEASE THE BUSINESS END OF THIS TRAP, OKAY. AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS... 1,400 POUNDS OF PRESSURE RIGHT ON MY TONGUE. MY STANDARD WARNING FOR THE SIDESHOW -- DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. [ CHUCKLES ] UH-HUH. AT THE COUNT OF THREE... A ONE... ...A TWO... ...THREE! AH! HEY, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU. HOW ARE YOU? IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU. I'M GOOD. THIS IS EVAN MICHELSON AND MIKE ZOHN. WE DID FIND SOMETHING PRETTY UNUSUAL. OH, MY GOD. Mike: THIS IS "ODDITIES." Danson: YOUR JOB IS TO RELEASE THE BUSINESS END OF THIS TRAP AT THE COUNT OF THREE, AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS... 1,400 POUNDS OF PRESSURE RIGHT ON MY TONGUE. DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. [ Muffled ] A ONE... ...A TWO... ...THREE! AH! AH! AH! AH! VERY GOOD JOB. PHYSICAL PAIN IS A SENSATION GENERATED BY THE NERVOUS SYSTEM THAT BASICALLY TELLS YOUR BODY THAT SOMETHING IS DAMAGING IT IN SOME SORT OF WAY. THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS AN INDIVIDUAL CAN DO TO INCREASE PAIN THRESHOLD, SUCH AS EXERCISE. AND ACCORDING TO A KEELE UNIVERSITY STUDY, SWEARING AT VERY HIGH VOLUMES. DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING THAT HAS THAT APPEAL -- SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE VISUAL? WE ACTUALLY DO HAVE ONE PIECE THAT MIGHT POSSIBLY WORK FOR YOU. I'LL SHOW IT TO YOU. ANY GUESSES ON THIS ONE? OOH. GREASES THE BEARINGS IN YOUR CAR? [ LAUGHS ] IT'S NOT A WRENCH. THIS IS USED TO SPREAD THE RIBCAGE OPEN. OH, MY GOD. THE STERNUM WOULD BE CUT, THIS WOULD BE PLACED, AND YOU WOULD CRANK THIS, AND IT WOULD SLOWLY OPEN UP YOUR CHEST CAVITY. OHH. THIS WOULD BE USED FOR THINGS LIKE OPEN-HEART SURGERY. IT WORKS JUST LIKE THIS. [ SQUEAKING ] THAT SOUND ALONE... [ CHUCKLES ] ...IS KIND OF INTENSE, RIGHT? YEAH. AHH. [ CHUCKLES ] YOU LIKE THAT? I REALLY LIKE THAT SOUND. WHAT WOULD AN ITEM LIKE THAT SET ME BACK? WE HAVE $150 ON THIS ONE. UH-HUH. MY NEXT QUESTION IS, DO I GET A DISCOUNT FOR BEING UGLY? [ LAUGHS ] I CAN DO A LITTLE BIT BETTER. I MEAN, WOULD $100 WORK FOR YOU? SOLD, MAN. [ Chuckling ] THANK YOU, MAN. LET'S DO IT. WRAP HER UP. [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] A CUSTOMER OF OURS WHO SURVIVED THROAT CANCER IS LOOKING FOR THREE VERY SPECIAL GIFTS FOR HIS CANCER SURGEON, SO WE'RE GONNA HEAD OUT TO BROOKLYN TO VISIT ANOTHER COLLECTOR WHO HAS A BUNCH OF MEDICALLY PRESERVED SPECIMENS. HOPEFULLY, SHE'LL HAVE HAVE SOMETHING FOR OUR CUSTOMER. JANNA! COME ON IN. GOD, THE SIZE OF THIS PLACE! Janna: WELL, AND THE HOUSE WAS IN DISREPAIR FOR MANY YEARS. THE PAINT WAS PEELING, AND IT GOT THE NICKNAME AS THE HAUNTED MANSION ON THE BLOCK. Mike: IT'S AMAZING. THEY JUST DON'T BUILD THINGS LIKE THIS ANYMORE. NO, THERE'S NOT MANY. SO, THE REASON WE'RE HERE IS A CUSTOMER CAME INTO THE SHOP. HE ACTUALLY HAD A SURGICAL PROCEDURE ON HIS NECK FOR CANCER, AND HE'S BEEN CURED, AND HE IS GETTING A GIFT FOR HIS SURGEON, AND HIS SURGEON'S AN EAR, NOSE, AND THROAT MAN. OKAY. SO HE CAME TO US ACTUALLY LOOKING FOR AN EAR, A NOSE, AND A THROAT. WE'RE REALLY LOOKING FOR THE THROAT PART, AND YOU SAID YOU HAD SOME MEDICAL THINGS HERE. I HAVE SOME THINGS HERE THAT YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN. ABSOLUTELY. THANK YOU. SO, THIS IS THE FIRST PIECE I HAVE OF INTEREST. A PHARMACY BOOK FROM 1902, FROM BRATTLEBORO, VERMONT, AND THERE IS PRESCRIPTIONS FOR EVERYTHING FROM OLIVE OIL FOR CONSTIPATION TO MORPHINE TO PROBABLY ***, I'M SURE. YEAH, THERE'S *** RIGHT THERE. YOU PROBABLY HAVE SOME SORE-THROAT REMEDIES IN HERE. I'M ABSOLUTELY SURE WE DO. YEAH, THIS IS A GREAT RECORD. IT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT WE'RE LOOKING FOR, THOUGH. WE'RE LOOKING FOR SOMETHING MAYBE A LITTLE MORE PHYSICAL. OKAY. WELL, THERE'S SEVERAL THINGS HERE. WHAT'S THAT PIECE THERE? IS THAT LIQUID? WHAT IS THAT THING? ABSOLUTELY. PLEASE. HUH. [ GASPS ] OH, MAN! Mike: THIS IS "ODDITIES." SO, THE REASON WE'RE HERE IS A CUSTOMER CAME INTO THE SHOP LOOKING FOR AN EAR, A NOSE, AND A THROAT. WE'RE REALLY LOOKING FOR THE THROAT PART. OKAY. WELL, THERE'S SEVERAL THINGS HERE. WHAT'S THAT PIECE THERE? OH. WHAT IS THAT THING? ABSOLUTELY. PLEASE. HUH. [ GASPS ] OH, MAN! OH, MY GOODNESS. LOOKS LIKE A HUMAN TRACHEA. LOOK AT THAT THING. THAT IS PERFECT. I THOUGHT IT WAS ANOTHER PART OF THE BODY. I HAD NO IDEA. YEAH, IT'S A LOVELY TRACHEA. WELL, THESE ARE DEFINITELY CARTILAGINOUS RINGS. THE HUMAN TRACHEA HAS ABOUT 15 TO 20 OF THEM, WHICH -- 1, 2... THIS LOOKS ABOUT RIGHT. THE HUMAN TRACHEA IS LINED WITH RIGID CARTILAGINOUS RINGS WHICH HOLD IT OPEN. WITHOUT THOSE RINGS, THE CHANGING AIR PRESSURE IN THE CHEST WOULD CAUSE THE TRACHEA TO COLLAPSE, AND WE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO BREATHE. THIS IS SO PERFECT FOR WHAT WE'RE LOOKING FOR. ABSOLUTELY. WOULD THIS THING BE FOR SALE? MAYBE. MAYBE. WHAT WOULD YOU NEED FOR THIS? HOW ABOUT $300? CAN YOU DO $250. $260. OOH! [ LAUGHS ] WELL, YOU KNOW, IT'S PERFECT. YEAH, WE'RE GONNA FIND ANOTHER ONE. YEAH. ALL RIGHT. SOLD. GOT A DEAL. THANKS, MIKE. HOW ABOUT $260 AND A TOUR OF THE JOINT? YOU CAN HAVE A TOUR. THAT'S FREE. WE'RE MEETING OUR CUSTOMER TED AT HIS DOCTOR'S OFFICE TO PRESENT THE GIFTS THAT WE FOUND FOR THEM. HOPEFULLY THEY'LL LIKE THEM AS MUCH AS WE DO, AND HOPEFULLY TED WILL BE OKAY WITH THE COST. HEY, TED. HOW YOU DOING? YOU'RE, LIKE, BEARING GIFTS, LIKE THE WISE MEN. THAT IS CORRECT. I HOPE YOUR DOCTOR... HE IS. HE'S EXPECTING US. Ted: I HAVEN'T SEEN WHAT THEY HAVE YET, BUT I WANT TO BE SURPRISED AT THE MOMENT THAT DR. PORTNOY IS. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT THEY'VE COME UP WITH. LET'S GO SEE THE DOCTOR. DR. PORTNOY. HEY, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU. I'M GOOD. THIS IS EVAN MICHELSON AND MIKE ZOHN. THEY OWN THE MOST WONDERFUL, WEIRDEST STORE IN THE WORLD. AND SINCE IT'S THE ANNIVERSARY OF MY BEING 10 YEARS CURED, I WANTED TO GET YOU A VERY UNUSUAL GIFT. THIS IS TOTALLY UNNECESSARY, TED. I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT. WELL, YOU SAVED MY NECK, MAN. [ LAUGHTER ] GLAD TO BE HERE TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING, SO... THIS IS THE FIRST PIECE, ACTUALLY, THAT TED SAW. YOU MAY RECOGNIZE THIS FROM YOUR WORK. YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN ONE OF THESE. I THINK AN EAR AND A TEMPORAL BONE, AS FAR AS I KNOW. THE NEAT THING IS THAT PART OPENS UP TO SHOW ALL THE INTERIOR OF THE MIDDLE EAR, THE INNER EAR. THAT'S INCREDIBLE. I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN SUCH A LARGE MODEL OF THE TEMPORAL BONE. THIS IS SORT OF THE SWEET SPOT RIGHT THERE. TYMPANIC MEMBRANE. OH, LOOK AT THAT. IT ACTUALLY MOVES. YEAH. IS THIS FAIRLY ACCURATE? THAT'S INCREDIBLE. NO, THAT IS UNBELIEVABLY ACCURATE. WOW. VERY NICE. THAT IS SO GENEROUS OF YOU, TED. NOW, THIS WAS AT THE SHOP WHEN TED CAME IN, SO HE SAW THIS, AND THEN HE SENT US ON A MISSION. CAN WE FIND THE NOSE AND THE THROAT? YOU'RE KIDDING. [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, THERE'S NOT THAT MUCH OUT THERE ON THE NOSE, UNFORTUNATELY. CAN IMAGINE. BUT WE DID FIND YOU THIS. A VERY SPECIAL NOSE. [ LAUGHS ] THIS ACTUALLY CAME FROM AN UNDERTAKER. YOU'RE KIDDING ME. THIS IS A POSTMORTEM PROSTHETIC NOSE. WHEN THEY WERE LAYING SOMEONE OUT, IF THEY HAD DAMAGE TO THEIR FACE AND THEY NEEDED TO RECONSTRUCT, THEY WOULD USE ONE OF THESE. THAT IS SOME NOSE. SO WE'VE BEEN SEARCHING AROUND LIKE CRAZY FOR THIS STUFF AND REALLY WANTED SOME REAL HOME RUN FOR THE THIRD PART OF THIS. AND WE DID FIND SOMETHING PRETTY UNUSUAL. YOU'RE KIDDING ME. OH, MY GOD. THAT'S A LARYNX AND A TRACHEA. THAT IS ONE AMAZING SPECIMEN. LOOK AT THAT. IT'S PERFECTLY PRESERVED. THE DISEASE, OF COURSE, YOU'LL SEE TUMORS... EXACTLY. AND THERE'S NO EVIDENCE OF ANY TYPE OF CANCER OR DISEASE IN THIS LARYNX, AND TRACHEA LOOKS PERFECT AND PRISTINE. I'M REALLY THRILLED TO HAVE IT HERE, TED. Ted: YOU GOT A MINI MUSEUM STARTED NOW. THAT'S REALLY GENEROUS OF YOU. THANK YOU SO MUCH, TED. WELL, THANK YOU. IT'S A PLEASURE. 10 YEARS -- THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT ALL WORTHWHILE FOR ME. ABSOLUTELY. THANKS. IT'S NOT UNCOMMON FOR DOCTORS TO RECEIVE GIFTS FROM PATIENTS, BUT GIFTS OF THIS NATURE, FOR SURE -- I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS AND PROBABLY WON'T AGAIN. IT WAS VERY INTERESTING AND QUITE EXCITING. WELL, YOU DID SUCH A GOOD JOB AND WENT TO THE FOUR CORNERS FOR THIS STUFF. NOW I NEED TO ASK, HOW MUCH DOES IT COME TO? WELL, YOU ALREADY KNOW THE EAR WAS $450 AT THE SHOP. THE OTHER TWO PIECES ACTUALLY WERE QUITE REASONABLE. THAT'S ALWAYS GOOD TO HEAR. I MEAN, THEY COME TO $450. OKAY. THE EAR IS $450, SO IT'D BE $900. THAT'S VERY WITHIN BUDGET. YOU EVEN CAME IN UNDER WHAT I EXPECTED. THANKS A LOT. APPRECIATE IT, THANKS. EVAN AND I ARE REALLY GLAD THAT DR. PORTNOY LIKED HIS GIFTS, AND TED WAS HAPPY WITH THEM, TOO. I MEAN, IT'S HARD TO BUY A GIFT FOR SOMEONE THAT SAYS, "HEY, THANKS FOR SAVING MY LIFE." YOU KNOW, IN THE END, WE FOUND AN EAR, WE FOUND A NOSE, WE FOUND A THROAT. LUCKILY, IT DIDN'T COST TED AN ARM AND A LEG.