Super Hero Squad Show, The - O, captain, my captain

[to "Three Blind Mice"] ♪ Three Valkyrie maids ♪ ♪ Three Valkyrie maids ♪ ♪ See how they spar ♪ ♪ Breaketh it downward ♪ [Wolverine] Hey, Goldilocks, Keep it down. [grunting] Yah. I'll never get the peace and quiet you need for a fight around here. [grunts] [grunts] Golly, that hurts! [growls] Wolverine, I am having much difficulty wearing these suspenders. Maybe it's because that takes pants. Pants. That is it. [panting] I feel them working already! [grumbles] Whoa! [laughs] [electric door opens] [laughing] [Wolverine grunts] Ha ha! Gotcha. [grumbles] [gasps] [grumbles] [growls] Lo siento, Wolverine. I meant that prank for Falcon, not you! I swear! Listen, kid, I'm going to go work on my bike now, and if it's not too much to ask for, can I just get some blasted time alone? [growls] Man, he's in a bad mood today. Really? How can you tell? [panting] Ah, finally. [Hulk] Hulk love pet! Hulk name pet-- uh-- uh-- Plant! Good, because that's what it is. Now, to care for it, first you have to give your plant plenty of sun. Mmm, yeah, yeah, yeah. [grunts] Now plant get plenty of sun! Okay, so much for green thumbs. Here, your plant will also need water. [grunts] [groans] [Wolverine grumbling] That...is...it! [echoing] [rumbles] I've had it with this whole stinking squad. None of you jokers take anything seriously! Well, I'm done with you misfits. Find yourself another pretty pair of claws. I quit! Don't be scared, Plant. Scary claw have issues. With that Infinity Sword, I will rule the universe. All right, Squaddies, time to hero up. ♪ When the bad guys are out ♪ ♪ All you have to do is shout now ♪ ♪ Who's going to hero up? ♪ ♪ Well, they may not get along ♪ ♪ But they're always fighting strong now ♪ ♪ Who's going to hero up? ♪ ♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪ ♪ They'll hero up again ♪ ♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero up ♪ ♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero up ♪ ♪ Wolverine and Hulk are fierce, Dr. Doom ends up in tears ♪ ♪ When Iron Man joins the fight ♪ ♪ Falcon darts in from the sky, Silver Surfer by his side ♪ ♪ Thor's hammer has thunder's might ♪ ♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪ ♪ They'll hero up again ♪ ♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero up ♪ ♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero up ♪ ♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero up ♪ ♪ Super Hero Squad ♪ I hate those Squaddies. [Wolverine] Appreciate the reassignment, Cap. Oh, think nothing of it, Wolverine. You're doing me a favor. There's been an international incident, and my team could use you. Really? Who we bringing the hurt to? The South American rain forests. Uh, but don't they usually need saving? Usually, but these trees attack everything in their path. I'm assembling the All Captains Squad to get to the roots of the problem. Uh, hate to tell you, Captain, but I ain't no Captain. Well, you are now. Welcome to the squad, Captain Canada. Here's your new uniform. Suit up. We'll talk at HQ. [laughs] Uh, not going to happen, bub. Rightio. I'll get you back to that Helicarrier ASAP. Uh, no, no, no. Wait. That's fine. [grumbles] [growling] [grunting] Blasted flag pajamas ride up. Hey, I'm Wolverine. [gasping] [grunting] So you don't like the new guy, huh? Stand down, Captains. Wolverine's our new Captain Canada. Ach! But he didn't perform the All Captains Salute within 2.7 seconds. Ach! He's not up to speed yet. The squad has a few rules and regulations you'll need to learn. But don't worry. There's a manual. Careful. Tell me when you need volume 2. Brilliant to have you aboard, Captain Canada. I am Captain Britain. [grunts] This is Captain Australia. G'day, Wolf guy. Captain Brazil. So good to meet you! [Captain Britain] And Captain Liechtenstein. Tiny, but economically prosperous! Wow. Bet that scares the bad guys. You already know Captain America. Take a seat, won't you? Ah. [chuckles] Ach. Destruction of S.H.I.E.L.D. property! That is against regulation BH-330. It is italicized! You're forgetting rule number 1, bub. I don't care. Right, then, cough up a buck, mate. [growls] Don't be upset, Captain Canada. It's the "No Arguing Between Captains" Jar. Every time someone fights, they pay a dollar. [sighs] Something tells me I'd better put in a 20. All Captains Squad, let's move out. Hey, watch it. It's the All Captain Squad exit procedure-- alphabetical by name. Great. At least I'm working with the pros. [Captain Liechtenstein] Ach! [blows raspberries] [Iron Man] Hmm, I've analyzed possible replacements for Wolverine's animal factor. My data shows that the most likely candidate is...Reptil. Congratulations. You mean it? Me? An official member of the squad? Yes! Whoa! All right! [laughs] On a trial basis, of course, and only if Wolverine doesn't return. You won't be disappointed, Iron Man. So what have you got for me? A secret mission? An assignment behind enemy lines? Grocery shopping. We're out of cereal. But that's 'cause Hulk keeps ripping apart the boxes to find the stupid toys inside! Huh, you want to explain that to him? [chomping] Paper or plastic? Neither. Bring your own cloth bag. It's more environmental. Quit hogging that com link! Well, you quit linking the com hog! That doesn't even make sense. Look, if you're going to argue, at least try to-- [Dr. Doom] Modok! Abomination! Listen well. A new villain has made himself known to Doom. It is vital that he is cooperative to our plans. He may be a powerful ally. Yeah, like the one we're standing in. [Modok] That's an alley, idiot. Alley! Who is this villain, Your Brilliance? The Ringmaster. You are to give him this com link as a welcome. He can be found at the Sinister Circus. [Modok laughs] Sinister Circus. What's so sinister about a circus? [Doctor Doom] I heard that! Oh, truly, there is no greater glory than two-for-one coupon day. Thor, mira-- I mean, look! But it's kind of our duty to follow those guys, right? Yea, though the prospect of storewide savings weighs heavily on my soul, methinks yon breakfast can wait. Nothing's amiss from above. Are you certain the village was at these coordinates? I'm certain. I found these discs, but the outpost camera's been destroyed. [growls] Plantman-- The original mean and green. Problem is you can never tell if you're dealing with him or one of his veggie copies. Only those veggies aren't good for your health. [trees growling] [villagers screaming] So let's go do some gardening. Nein! We don't fight until the debriefing is over. Regulation KC-1217. [grumbles] [Captain Britain] The copies of Plantman make it hard to identify the real bad seed. Fortunately, Captain Australia has prepared a report of all possible battle scenarios. [grunts] Do you guys plan everything? Oh, yes. Regulation number SBD-86. So what do you do when you get attacked by a hundred-foot plant monster? Oh, wait a tick, I don't recall anything about a-- [roaring] [grunting] [animal growl] [grunting] [grunts] [grunting] [thud] Chopped salad anyone? [growls] You're welcome. [grunts] [grunts] [Captain Liechtenstein] You are wasting your time, Canada! That one calls for a down-under flying ski roll. [Captain Liechtenstein] Eins, zwei. Drei. [grunting] And that is how we do it in Vaduz! Represent! Trust me, bub, that one's going to give you a stomach ache! Let go, Canada! [yells] Sonic samba! ♪♪ [humming to Latin beat] [sighs] [grunts] Rrrrah! Wow. Almost makes me want to take dance lessons. [plant monster growls] Captain America! [grunting] Cannoli Conundrum, just like in '42! Fall back to checkpoint 2! Wait. You can't run away! That thing's got Cap! [grunting] Fall back, Captain Canada. That is an order. [growls] Say what you want about my old team, but we never left a man behind. That's weird. Why would Modok and Abomination go in there? Mayhap 'tis free popcorn day. What, do you have a guess? Huh, what's so evil about a circus? You know, that's exactly what I said. [both growl] Then we found this. [laughs] Stegosaurus plates! Whoa, hey. [growls] [both gasp] Methinks tis time to smack down yon clowns! [whimpering] Methinks I need a bigger trikey! [yells] This isn't right! No! Ha ha ho! I so won a jumbo stuffed animal for that! [Modok screams] Now, big-top brigands, we would have answers to our queries! Yeah, like what are you two doing snooping around a circus? They're here for the same reason you are-- to see me. Now, look closer. [laughs maniacally] You are completely... in my power. [together] We are completely in your power. [laughs] Now sleep! Okay. [both snoring] Welcome to the circus. Too bad you can't stay. What kind of outfit are you running here, Britain? Cap would have fought for every one of us bums, and all of you turned tail and ran. You know, being a hero isn't about following regulations. It's about being there for your team, so I'm going to go find Cap, and I don't care who's with me. We are all with you, Wolverine. You're-- Ja, didn't you hear Captain America call the Cannoli Conundrum? [grumbles] That's why you read the manual, mate. A secret maneuver that Cap perfected in 1942. We've all heard the story... a lot. Captain America let the monster take him behind enemy lines so he can pinpoint Plantman's base. Now we'll know where to attack. But to do that, you'd have to-- Track him. We're all bugged, Canada. It's in the uniform. Huh, I knew I didn't like this thing. From the strength of his attack, we suspect that Plantman has an Infinity Fractal. He's controlling the jungle through its root system. Soon he'll have power over all the plants in the world-- [tracker beeps] We've got a lock. It's a greenhouse! [Captain Liechtenstein] Plant villain-- It figures. Then we are ready to strike. About time. Hero up! Hero up? What's that supposed to mean? It's-- you know, a battle cry thing. [growls] [snoring] [gasps] [yawns] Wait. What fiends seek to cage mighty Thor? [grunting] Are we in jail? Oh. I don't remember anything. [lions growl] [gasps] Cats. I'm allergic! Brachiosaurus body! [growling] [cans rattle] Hey, a little help, Thor? Mjolnir, to me. Tis true. I was never a cat person. [whip cracks] So Doctor Doom was correct! You are excellent entertainment. Look into my eye. Who do you see? [Silver Surfer] Someone who's about to feel mondo pain. [gasps] [laughs] Look into my-- [snarling] Nice kitty... [laughs nervously] Kitties! [meow] [laughing] Ooh. Here, kitty kitty. [growling] Hulk like kitties. [yelps] [whimpering] Nice kitties. An infrared optic burst will counteract that ray. Gad! Thanks, Iron Man, but how did you know we needed help? Huh? Oh, no, Hulk got tired of waiting for his cereal. [Captain Britain] It is impossible to tell which one is the real Plantman this far away. Then we do it up close and personal. For once, I'm way ahead of you. Hold it, twinkle toes. This is no time for dancing! Hey, when are you going to learn to trust the way we do things, mate? [sniffing] None of these overgrown weeds is Plantman! We're wasting our time. I smell him inside, and I'm not talking in some Captain code mumbo jumbo, either. I mean the boss squash is really in there! For Cap! My children told me you were coming. It's nice, really. We don't get many visitors this deep in the rain forest. My babies do get hungry. [growls] [howls] Attack! It's true. The grass is meaner on the other side. [grunts] [yells] [growls] [gasps, coughing] Wretched poison. [roars] [panting] There's got to be a better way to whack these weeds! They're not getting enough sun. [rumbling] Oh, my babies, my babies. What is wrong? What's wrong? Can't you hear me? [Captain America] Good job, team. The Cannoli Conundrum, just like in '42. Did I ever tell you that story? There I was, the Red Skull had hijacked an arms shipment to the Pasha of Grandistan... Go fish. Excellent work, Captain Canada. You'll be a valuable asset to the All Captains Squad. Uh, yeah, how about that? Good as your team is, they're still a little by the book for my taste. My old squad drove me nuts, but at least their shorts weren't twisted so tight. No offense. Fantastic! No, I really think it's for the-- Huh? Oh, I knew the Super Hero Squad was a better fit for you all along. Hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut. You couldn't have just told me? [Squaddies] Good to see you. [Iron Man] Good to have you back, Wolverine. I'm so glad you decided to remain with the squad, Wolverine. Now your mentoring will help me become an asset to the team. No sweat, kid. I look forward to being your mentor again. Hulk give Claw present from South America. Yeah, it was a little too much for him to take care of. Hulk doesn't do responsibility well. Oh, gee, thanks. A plant. What the-- [grunting] Whoa! Whoa! [Squaddies grunting, objects crashing, shattering] Closed-Captioned By J.R. Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA