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-So I have to ask.
I've been here 20 minutes, and I still can't tell.
Is that a real pigeon? -What?
Pigeon? What pigeon?
What are you talking about?
Yeah, up there on the TV.
Oh, my god.
Oh, wow.
Oh, no, no.
So I'm not seeing things.
I got pretty drunk this morning at brunch at the lodge.
Did you know there's *** in a Bloody Mary?
Bob, what are you doing?
Uh, I'm moving away from the pigeon that's
inside of the restaurant.
How'd it get in here?
Did it just walk through the door?
Can pigeons open doors?
Do you mean metaphorically?
In the right situation, I suppose.
[hoots]
[gasps]
God, Bob, I've never seen you so afraid of something so tiny.
It's not tiny.
It's like a small eagle.
All right.
Well, calm down.
I'll shoo it out.
Teddy, open the door.
Got it.
I guess, Bob, you keep cowering.
On it.
Come on, mister pigeon.
Come on, mister pigeon.
Come on, out.
[screaming]
Oh!
Thanks for scaring him toward my face.
Bob, what are you doing?
You're freaking him out.
I'm gonna go to the kitchen not because I'm scared,
but because I'm the cook.
Yeah, right.
You don't look scared at all.
Is it still out there?
Yes, it's still here sitting on one of the stools right now.
It's a stool pigeon.
[laughter]
Stool pigeon.
Will you stop having fun with this?