Back to the Borderlands - Lyrics - Dan Bull

Go! Hello, Pandora fans I'd like to show my awesome plans Hold on tight to your organs, glands We're riding back to the Borderlands When I hear that Gearbox Are releasin' a sequel, my teardrops Are uncontrollable I'm inconsolable, but fear not They're tears of joy, like me as a boy After Christmas Eve when I see a box I open it up and say "whoa" at the view It's only overflowin' with loot Lockin' and loadin', I know what to do Now who am I going to shoot? You, you're a pitiful prick So I'm ripping you up with a critical hit Funds improve my guns and loot I'll use it if it'll fit If it moves I'll shoot it, you *** I'm a buzzard, you're a blue *** I fly in the sky and it's fatal Foes are lying disabled A hole in their face; I'm reminded of bagels I'm ever so slightly unstable Me? I'm hardly an angel Leave that to the Guardian Angel This is the eighties, I'm Arnie And painfully makin' your army unfaithful Health and safety; watch your head Heavy metal; lots of lead But before I drop you dead I'll shred you up like Dr. Zed I said "Zed, let him in" Led Zeppelin Never played on David Letterman Though that may be irrelevant Nevertheless it's a hell of method of making it evident Dan is the cleverest rapper To ever use gamin' in tracks Setting a precedent that wouldn't ever be bettered Till weapons are made into raps Eighty seven bazillion guns A similar number of brilliant puns Turn that to cash, gimme the funds Back to back with my militant chums I'm blastin' stacks of straps at prats It's action packed ridiculous fun If kills were calories, that'd be fattenin' Fragging a *** and I'm baggin' and taggin' him Having you laggin' and manically panicking Man, is it actually happenin'? Well, I'm an assassin assassinin' you So if that is a fact then it has to be true You're chatting Claptrap So I should grab your nadsack and yank it So your *** are dropping Like the stock is on the NASDAQ ***, don't answer back Who the *** is Handsome Jack? You want how many grams of that? I'll grind you like my *** sack I will be havin' you cryin' in agony Violently crackin' your violin; Paganini Meeny miny mo More money, less problems The bigger the gun, the less nonsense I'm less Mark Ronson, more Charles Bronson Or a vault Hunter S. Thompson Said I'm less Mark Ronson, more Charles Bronson Or a vault Hunter S. Thompson Less Mark Ronson, more Charles Bronson Or a vault Hunter S. Thompson I'm less Mark Ronson, more Charles Bronson Or a vault Hunter S. Thompson I'm less Mark Ronson, more Charles Bronson Or a vault Hunter S. Thompson