Drunk Cliffsnotes

Hi boys and girls. My name is Kyle Amman and I would like to offer you my own personal senior gift. As we all know sometimes seminar books can be a *** to read. And so I was thinking that for emergencies it might be nice to have some CliffsNotes on hand so you can go to seminar and impress your tutors, impress your friends with some hard earned insights by someone else entirely. So the Meno... are we on? Yeah. So the Meno starts out with, uh, this dude named Meno asking Socrates, "Hey Socrates!" "Uh, can virture be taught?" "Or is it this other thing that" "I don't know, ***, can't be taught?" And so Socrates goes, "Hey Meno!" "[Insert ironic praise here]" "You're a dipshit!" "because the real question is 'What is Virtue?'" "so lets talk about that for a while." So then Meno just suceeds in progressively *** up the definition of virtue more and more as he tries to name all these things that look like virtue but are probably not until finally he says, "*** it, Socrates. Why don't you tell me what virtue is?" And Socrates goes, "No." And then basically the story ends. Okay, now we're going to do Physics. Or maybe Metaphysics. I'm not actually sure which one So whichever one other people sounds familiar to use this. So Physics and/or Metaphysics Aristotle is like everything has a soul and that soul has a tendency. And so like the soul of rock is conveniently to fall to, ya know, the *** ground. Phedre, which is the French version of the Greek story of Hippolytus, only it actually has the sense to focus on the interesting character in the story is about a woman who wants to bone her step-son. So she's like, "Hey Hippolytus!" "I wanna jump up on dat!" And Hippolytus is like, "I don't..." "know!" I don't even remember how it begins, it's like something about, "When that Aprilis, with his showers swoot, sweet" "The drought of March hath pierced to the root," "I went to ***" Anyway, Thomas of Canterbury They're all visiting Thomas of Canterbury which is why it's called 'The Canterbury Tales'. I'm a personal fan of Leibniz because Leibniz knew how math worked unlike Kant... who didn't. And so Leibniz proved math... well not mathematically, but qualitatively, intuitively, that the world we live in is the best of all possible worlds because it has to be because, if God really created the universe, he'd know what the *** he was doing and every set back would really just be the 'step back' You could create a rap out of this is you were really smart. The best of all possible worlds is A world that is run like Leibniz's is And that is one where every set back Is actually just a step back before a run where you leap over an abyss to see where Truth and Justice is. Because! Every true mechanic knows that goodness is just something that rhymes with mechanic! You know I'm not Eminem, right? Absolut like is like the hipster *** but Smirnoff is always there to be like, "We're what *** is really like."