Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
[chime]
[crowd cheering]
ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen, marine biologist,
Dr. Tiffany Fern.
The ocean-- it covers 70% of the surface of the earth,
and only now are we beginning to explore what lies underneath.
All that changed last spring when I, Dr. Tiffany Fern,
charted this vessel to the lowest depths
that had ever been reached.
And I'll tell you what we learned.
The ocean is absolutely disgusting.
Now, I know this may come as a shock to some of you.
But to you I say, look at this hot, nasty piece
of ocean trash.
This is the kind of utter filth that was down there,
not some cool, coral reef colony.
I mean, look at this, and tell me it's not a living nightmare.
Woo!
Hell no, you freaky fish idiot.
No!
[screams]
OK!
I don't remember putting that in there.
Is someone playing a prank on me?
Is it Steven?
Are y'all playing a prank on me?
Now, to our knowledge, this creature is the only known
species of its kind.
And I brought it here today for you to see.
And if you're anything like me, you'd
be worried that this nasty slug [bleep]
would climb up your pee hole while you're trying to have
a nice day at the beach.
Well I'll tell you this-- it won't.
God, oh, god.
Because I'm going to ensure the extinction of this species.
You're welcome!
In conclusion, I say just blow up
the ocean, the entire ocean-- even the dolphin part.
They deserve to die too.
And, my friends, this is an idea worth spreading.
Here's a souvenir, [bleep].