Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
Can't keep hiding forever.
Time for you to step
out of the shadows.
So, you coming?
Ultimate Spider-Man,
ready to go.
Uh, where exactly are we going?
Spider-Man Being labeled
a menace is getting to him.
And I know how that goes.
Figured I'd bring the kid
to meet my support group.
This is your support group?
Spidey!
Check it out, Hulk fans.
I can't believe we got the amaze-ball
Spider-Man on the web show.
Say what now?
These cameras follow you everywhere?
Yeah, and you're just in time for our
gut-buster burrito-eating contest.
I'd better not.
My delicate
arachnid constitution.
Plus, I have reservations
at the grown-ups' table.
Peace out.
Trusted news source
J.
Jonah Jameson here
This is it?
We're playing cards?
It ain't cards, it's poker.
Green goliath
the Hulk is even worse
Grab a chair, wall-crawler,
and I'll deal you in.
Who plays poker in a mask?
It's an unfair advantage.
Ah.
I understand.
Kind of a newbie at poker.
Kid sits next to me.
Huh?
Ugh!
Gee, thanks.
I guess.
As if this city wasn't
suffering enough
with our own masked
menace Spider-Man,
the rampaging monster known
as the Hulk has been spotted.
Imagine if the two
became a regular team-up.
Lock your doors!
We're looking at threat level orange!
Nice!
That's how I'd do it too.
My Spidey sense is tingling.
Yeah.
That hand stinks.
No, it's
Okay, who's the party crasher?
Don't know, don't care.
So let's smash it already!
Nobody trashes my poker night!
It's clobberin'
- Ben!
- That's it!
Uh, Hulk?
Is this part of the game?
No, it's not.
What do we do now Hulk?
Time to smash.
Yeah, sure.
Go hang out with the Hulk.
Play some cards.
It'll be a hoot.
It's the Hulk!
Run for your lives!
Let's get out of here!
Come on!
Hulk's the good guy.
Let 'em run from me.
Gets them out of harm's way.
Hey, leave some for us!
Whoa!
That thing, it just
zapped all our friends!
No.
Look up there.
I'm betting that thing
teleported them
into that spaceship
or whatever it is.
Why did we get left behind?
Don't know,
but we're gonna find out.
Hello? Hello?
Dang it! I can't get a hold of the
Fantastic Four or the Avengers.
Probably got them, too.
Let me guess.
We're just gonna fly up there
and go in blasting.
Yup.
Well, don't just sit
there, Webhead.
Man the weapons!
Less talking, more shooting.
Just like a video game,
except "game over"
really is game over.
Ew! Smells like Hulk ear.
Hulk?
Big gun, Hulk.
- Hulk?
- I see it!
Well, turn!
You are unclear
on the whole turning concept.
Bought enough time
to get you into a spacesuit, didn't I?
Yeah, She-Hulk's
spacesuit.
Thanks a lot.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
It's the closest thing
we have in your size.
Besides, it's a
good look on you.
Hilarious.
What do we do first?
Shut down the tractor beam or
rescue the beautiful princess?
Will you shut it?
Stay behind me.
Don't get hurt.
And be quiet.
Yeah, 'cause you're as quiet
as a little green mouse.
Whoa.
You were right.
They're all here.
The fantastic four,
the Avengers,
And my agents
of S.
M.
A.
S.
H.
!
Paralyzed in some kind
of prison bubbles.
And what is that?
And there's the Thing.
Magnificent, isn't it?
Every major hero,
including many rare and unique ones,
most in mint condition.
So what are you,
some kind of collector?
I'm The Collector!
And I know who you are.
The rampaging Hulk
and the masked
vigilante Spider-Man.
I've researched this planet
to learn which heroes to collect.
From monitoring your
trusted information dispenser
J.
Jonah Jameson,
it's clear that you two
do not qualify.
I don't qualify as a hero?
You can't listen to anything
J.
Jonah Jerkface says.
I mean, Wolverine?
Wolverine is a hero and I'm not?
That guy runs around
stabbing people!
And he smells like wet dog,
which in itself is
a punishable crime.
You're letting them go now!
Ooh!
That looks like it hurt.
yep.
You're not heroes.
You're menaces.
Undesirable and
in poor condition.
You're not collectible
and you have no value.
Oh, not the trash chute!
Menaces indeed.
But look at these interesting
gamma-powered variants.
The red one, the blue one,
the primitive one.
And even a rare female variant.
And they're all mine!
How humiliating.
And of course it's all
been caught on camera.
Oh, great.
Someone turned up the heat.
That's not another teleporter.
No, it's a disintegrator.
Note to Spidey, next time
the Hulk takes you into space,
- don't go.
- Too late now.
Figures, I put on a mask,
tried to be a hero,
and get thrown out
with the garbage.
A mask doesn't make you a hero.
It's the guy beneath it.
Oh, this is not good!
I've got an idea!
You think those puny Spidey webs
are gonna hold my weight?
These puny Spidey webs will hold
but my super-springy
slingshot is only gonna work
if you're strong enough
to get us out of here.
Status update, bug-man.
I do strong!
All right.
Hulk, anytime now.
Hulk?
Okay, now!
- It worked.
- Of course it worked.
I wish J.
Jonah Jerkison was around
so I could rub it in his face.
Been there.
Kids gotta learn you can't
control how people see you.
You can only control
the things you do.
Ultra rare, this hero.
So valuable,
in near mint condition.
Fitting, he's the last
of my acquisitions.
Now, it's time for phase two.
- Phase two?
- Stay here and watch my back.
I'm on it.
Stop!
Guys, he's coming back!
My precious collection!
What are you doing?
What's it look like I'm doing?
Oh, hey, who did that?
What died?
It was me.
Revenge of the burrito.
Hey, I was stuck
in there with it.
Ugh! Makes me want to climb
back into my pod.
Ugh!
My collectibles!
Out of their packaging!
You're no longer
in mint condition
and more trouble
than you're worth.
This way.
We'll have to
come back for the others.
Wait for me!
Perhaps I'll salvage some
meager value from you
once you're in pieces.
Probes,
hunt down and exterminate
those defective collectibles.
It's time to execute my plan
to make my collection
priceless.
Make his collection priceless?
What does that even mean?
Work it out later.
Spidey coming through!
We gotta go back.
We can free the Avengers
No time!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Cover us!
- Whoa!
Okay, will do!
Okay, what's our plan?
Well, our favorite
fully-articulated space hoarder
said he'd make his
collection priceless.
So how do you fix it so your
action figures are one of a kind?
You wreck everyone else's.
Or, you wreck the
place they came from.
You mean that maniac is
going to destroy the Earth?
Yup.
We have to find out what
he's gonna use and smash it.
Look for a big cannon,
a giant robot
A really humongous bomb?
That'll work.
We don't have much time before
this firecracker pops the earth.
So what?
I can disable it.
A- Bomb, you help him.
I gotta work with him?
If the
probes are after us,
the collection room
might be unguarded.
Good point.
Jen, use the teleporter to
beam the others out of here.
Skaar will cover you.
All right, shaggy, you're with me.
Spidey, you're with me.
Really?
You want me with you?
I- I mean, sure.
If you need me for the
big throw-down, I'm in.
People underestimate
the Web-head.
He's just a kid but he's tough.
Handy in a fight.
And he's smart.
Let's do this thing.
Get this party popper open
and cut the blue wire.
- Or is it the red wire?
- Will you zip it?
I disposed of ordnance
in the military.
It just requires
a little bit of patience!
- Neither of which
- Shut up!
I'm trying to concentrate!
Yeah, let's see, green
Blue.
Red!
Uh.
This bomb is making me mad!
I don't think that's working.
- Quick, hide!
- All right, all right!
Skaar?
See that thingy there?
No smashy-smash.
We need it to get back to earth.
Skaar know.
Skaar not dumb.
We need a distraction.
Skaar is awesome.
I mean, he's a wild dog,
but he's awesome.
Great.
The controls.
Sure, just use the teleporter,
he says.
Beam the others out.
What about the part where
I don't read alien jerk language?
Maybe this?
Oops.
Maybe not.
Get him!
Whoa!
I'm okay.
No, I'm not.
I could hear your footsteps
from a galaxy away.
Think of how valuable
my collection of earthlings will be
when they're the last
ones left alive.
No one on your planet wants you.
So why should I?
You are unworthy.
You are making me angry,
you obsessive little twerp!
Obsessive little twerp?
How's it coming, Red?
Ha-ha!
Now we're cooking!
Cut the red wire
and disarm this baby
in no time.
Red? The bomb's gonna drop.
I'm working on it!
Have you lost your mind?
No, I found the answer.
I smashed the door thingy
so they can't open.
The bomb can't drop.
You're welcome.
Oh, so it'll blow up in here!
With us! Great idea,
kid.
Great idea!
So
Maybe we run for it?
Come on, come on!
Has to be some way
to shut that thing down.
We're running out of time here.
I needed that.
Yeah! Smashy-smash!
Whoo!
Ow!
Organs squishing
Kid, I might not be a hero,
but you are.
New York City's
lucky to have you.
I'm sorry no one ever
got to see your
true hero self.
What is he talking about?
What does he mean,
"true hero self"?
Everyone knows a true hero
isn't the costume,
but the guy beneath the mask.
Yeah, but you knew that, right?
There's a hero underneath here?
This I must see for myself.
And are you ever in for a treat.
For I am the amazing,
spectacular, ultimate Spider-Man!
No.
You're just some mundane
adolescent earthling.
Nothing special at all!
That's the point.
You hear that coming
a galaxy away?
Never thought your giant green ninja
skills would come in so handy.
I never thought your ability to
talk would come in so handy.
Sorry for you folks at home,
but my identity has
to remain a secret.
Only got seconds
before ka-blooey.
Jen, get us out of here!
Teleport hub's online.
I think I can send
everyone back in one shot.
Hey, I-I think it's working!
- Where have you two been?
- Saving your butts!
But, my collection.
Whew! Nick of time.
We all present
and accounted for?
Everybody.
Plus one.
I was wrong about you.
Despite what I've heard,
you're not menaces.
We never saw ourselves
as menaces.
And we aren't.
You've proven that you are among
the greatest of Earth's heroes.
Next time, I'll come
for you first.
Uh, and that's
a good thing, how?
Hey, night's still young.
We could finish our poker game.
Or you, me, Skaar, and Hulk
have a late night gut-buster
burrito-eating contest.
What do you think?
Twenty-five burritos
and counting.
Hulk out.