Landlord 2027

-So it says here that Lindsay Lohan is reinventing herself again. Hey, did you get that letter from the doctor? -I did. -What did it say? -My gay dad's dead. -I knew it. Those blood tests don't lie. [KNOCKING] Who's there? -Well, I own my property outright now, so it could be anybody. Pearl? -I don't pay rent anymore, Pearl. I own this place. -No, I pay the bank. -Hey, don't talk to me like that. I'm a grown man. And you're a grown woman. (SINGING) What am I doing? Somethng's very, very wrong, spoofing other people's content. It's completely-etely wrong. My Damn Channel's not for mindless parody. It's artistic liberation and originality. -What am I doing? Something's now quite right. I'm a nobody whose dress is clearly three sizes too tight. My Damn Channel's not for just your average Jane. It's for big-time swanky artists who can really entertain. -Entertain. -Say there Mr. Internet. -Hello there Mrs. Web. If you really want-- -Stop. Stop. What's-- what is this? Boom package? Arie kit? You've got, like, three grips here. Is that a craft services table? What is-- what is this? There are three people back in that urine-soaked hell-hole that are slaving to get My Damn Channel put up as a haven for professional content, and you're sitting here doing this? This is not professional. This is-- this is dinner theater. Look at her. [CRYING] Look at her. -Um. -Now let's wrap this *** up and get out of whoever's apartment this is now. Now! Can I get a ride?