Where to find the power to heal Healing Power /

Since last summer I’ve been talking about the “clear sky,” and so the connection between the “clear sky” and “clouds.” This is a very traditional Buddhist way of thinking. It points to all our inner tension and anxiety. Isn’t the reason for this unease all our non-stop negative emotions? Feelings of insecurity arise and don’t stop, worry arises and doesn’t stop, anger boils up and doesn’t stop, you get jealous and that carries on, isn’t this what’s going on? So the thing is, why doesn’t it stop? Why? We always come up with stuff like “My partner’s no good,” or “Tokyo Electric’s no good” Still, however much you blame Tokyo Electric, or your husband or wife, or your parents, or your kids, however much you blame your boss or ex-boyfriend, it doesn’t help at all. That’s not the heart of the matter. The continual anxiety itself is the issue. If not, well, you just end up bad mouthing your ex, and that doesn’t help. Or you go protest in front of Tokyo Electric... which I’m not criticizing mind you. They have to fix their mistakes …. I’m not criticizing that. However, the real heart of the matter is the ceaseless unease. The non-stop anxiety and what to do about it, that’s the main thing. And the medicine that stops the unease isn’t some anti-anxiety pill, you know. Those only dull you down. It’s not about relying on something, but actually going beyond the unease. So, where on earth do you find the healing power that overcomes unease itself? That’s the thing. You know what I mean? The point is whether you can put your full trust in finding that or not. Folks that have had some contact with Buddhism will get this, but it will likely be a shock to others, and sure, your dis-ease has various causes, but actually your relationship with your parents, stuff with your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend… of course these things happen. But actually that’s not the main thing. The problem we’re grappling with is the real and raw dis-ease that’s right before our eyes. And once you’ve grasped that, well, what are you going to do about it? Finding the true healing power is the issue. Oh, there’s only 10 minutes left… there’s no way I’m going to finish. As far as “clouds” and the “clear sky” goes, the unease you feel is a cloud, and there are two kinds, light and dark. Your anxiety is a dark cloud. See what I’m saying? Think of it like that. The dark clouds inside you are the so-called negative emotions. The white clouds are your positive emotions. So both dark and light clouds are always tumbling within you, you see? Those dark clouds are really powerful though and never let up. Once unease starts, once worry starts, once anger arises, once these things have been stirred up, you don’t know what to do about it. And no one’s ever taught you how to handle it either. Who would you have learned from? Not your parents or teachers, not your college professors, not your boss or your friends, not your girlfriend or boyfriend, not your husband or wife, nobody. It’s surprising, isn’t it? You’ve learned all sorts of other stuff from them, right? But isn’t the most crucial thing dealing with what makes you suffer most? Learning how to handle your pain, isn’t that the most important part? You should really be surprised no one ever taught you what to do about your suffering. Well, most people don’t even get the concept. I’ve talked about this a lot before though. Basically, as long as you're living the usual way, within your heart dark and light clouds endlessly billow along. This is everyone’s reality. You see? So you try all sorts of stuff because you want to do something about these dark and painful clouds. You want to get at the causes, so you try all kinds of things, but nothing really works. And there, trying to figure out what’s best to do, at last you come to meditation. We'll actually practice this after. The real issue is getting free of the endless tumble of dark and light clouds. Then in working out what to do about it, finally you encounter meditation. Through watching the breath, through feeling sensations in the body, what we're after in doing this... and maybe some of this isn't clear now, but will be later when we actually practice... this is what we’re doing, getting free of these clouds. Or to put it another way, we enter a world free of clouds. But you haven’t been there yet. You haven’t been there. So you don’t really get it. What people call happiness is really just a white cloud. You have both dark and light clouds in your life. The dark clouds make you suffer, but there are light clouds too, and they make you a little happy, but it never lasts very long. On this point everyone gets mixed up. Now what we’re after are by no means perfectly white clouds. We’re not seeking the “whitest clouds of all.” Not that, but the clear sky that’s free of both light and dark clouds, this is what we’re seeking, you see. And you'll see the "clear sky" for yourself shortly... Through meditation, through watching the breath and bodily sensations, you enter the clear sky where all clouds have been released. This is experiential, so don’t worry. It’s not a theory, it’s an actuality. You enter the clear sky, and at that moment you find yourself standing in a different place. Until now you’ve lived among the clouds, stood among the clouds. But when you stand in the clear sky where all clouds float freely, only then do you feel great compassion towards those clouds. You see? Only at that time can the dark clouds of the past transform, can they disperse. Maybe someone has deeply insulted you or done something terrible to you. You hold resentment and all sorts of anger towards that person. Usually you keep it hidden, but it comes out again. That’s all been stored up, you see? That’s what makes you suffer, but standing in the clear sky, for the first time, the clouds have a real chance to transform, to disperse. In the true sense, you can let go of the negative emotions stored up from the past. Why's that? This “Why” is the crux of the matter. Because that’s been vague “healing power” comes off sounding like mere pretty words. There’s only one reason why real healing power is there. It’s because those clouds aren’t you. That’s it. That’s the crucial point. It’s because you’re the clear sky. When you realize you’re the clear sky, of course dark clouds still well up, but from the sky’s point of view it’s no big deal. When you stand in the clear sky, at last, the store of dark clouds that wells up in everyone disperses. The reason they disperse is that the clouds aren’t you. That’s the essence of what’s called healing power. Knowing those clouds aren’t you. But haven’t you always thought they were? Resentment arose towards someone, you grasped it. Grasping, what is grasping? We thought that was us. It's odd, but we’re all victims in one way or another. Haven’t all sorts of things happened to us? Nonetheless, if you adopt the standpoint of a victim, you’ll always be one. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we should let it slide when people do wrong. Not at all, but even though we may have been victimized, we don’t have to remain victims our whole lives. Why’s that? Well, if you think something’s been done to you, it’s a dark cloud. And because you mistakenly think you’re that cloud, “I’m such-and-such a victim,” this becomes your identity. But to the extent you think like this, you stay a victim for your whole life. You remain that dark cloud for an entire lifetime. But it’s not necessary, you can give up being a victim right away. When? The moment you stand in the clear sky. When you stand in the clear sky, it’s clear that dark cloud isn’t you.