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(TITO SANTANA THEME SONG PLAYING)
MONSOON: I like that music.
HEENAN: Probably like heartburn, too.
(SEXY BOY PLAYING)
MONSOON: Oh, boy!
FINKEL: His opponent, coming down the aisle with the Sensational Sherri,
from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 238 pounds,
Shawn Michaels!
MONSOON: Shawn Michaels, making his way down with Sherri.
What a match-up this is going to be!
HEENAN: You know, Monsoon, these dumb Hoosiers here in Indiana are so stupid,
last night you were supposed to set your clock ahead,
they set all their clocks back, they're still jammed out front!
There's another couple thousand people out front.
They lost track of time. That shows you how dumb they are here in Indiana.
MONSOON: I understand there's quite a traffic problem out there.
This place will be jam-packed very shortly.
Too bad a lot of them are gonna miss this great match.
A lot of ability being shown by Shawn Michaels, who, incidentally,
has already challenged, Brain, the winner of the Intercontinental match-up.
HEENAN: Well, I think if there's going to be
an Intercontinental Champion down the line,
it's got to be this Shawn Michaels.
He is ready, he is arrogant, he's cocky, he's got Sensational Sherri,
that's my pin-up girl! He's got to have the gold down the way.
MONSOON: I think you should see your oculist.
HEENAN: Nothing wrong with my feet.
MONSOON: I'm talking about your eyes.
HEENAN: You're just jealous 'cause she turned you down.
(MONSOON SCOFFS)
HEENAN: She is in love with that man.
HEENAN: Pardon?
MONSOON: Is the feeling mutual?
HEENAN: Oh, what do you think? She's there, isn't she?
He doesn't allow any... Woman to be there.
No, I didn't say that. I coughed.
No, I said... (COUGHS)
Clearing my throat. I'm excited. This is WrestleMania VIII.
MONSOON: Take a look at that...
Who do you think does her makeup, Helen Keller?
HEENAN: I like it. I like it!
MONSOON: Got a tattoo right on her chest.
Be good, all right? Don't move until I tell you.
MONSOON: He said, "Don't move until I tell you."
HEENAN: Look, look! Oh!
Lay one on me, baby!
She doesn't need makeup. She's naturally beautiful.
She could do Max Factor commercials, Revlon, Mary Kay. She could do it all.
MONSOON: How about heavy road equipment movers?
Yes!
HEENAN: I'm telling Michaels what you said about his squeeze.
MONSOON: I hope so.
He should be concerned about former Intercontinental Champion, Tito Santana.
HEENAN: Well, you've gotta be concerned about Santana.
He's a premier Superstar here in the WWF.
But Michaels is young, he's eager, he's hungry.
And he wants it bad.
MONSOON: No substitution for experience. Nice block by Tito,
and a right hand right to the kisser.
Ducks underneath a clothesline. Look out, high crossbody!
Referee right there, but no, two-count only.
Not much love lost in this one.
HEENAN: Did Santana punch Sherri?
You said he got hit in her kisser.
His kisser. Or her kisser.
I just asked a question.
I'm a broadcast journalist. I have that right.
MONSOON: Nice drop down by Tito. Shawn, over the top.
Leapfrog, a beauty.
It's time to rethink this one.
HEENAN: Oh! Whoa!
MONSOON: Boy, she didn't waste any time getting around there.
HEENAN: That's her man. She stands by her man.
MONSOON: That's her meal ticket.
Tito, all business.
HEENAN: Don't mess with her boy toy.
MONSOON: Well, look at this.
Can't turn your back on a guy like Tito Santana.
HEENAN: Now he should have to break the hold.
The man was in the ropes, he pulled him off the ropes.
MONSOON: Just helped him back inside.
HEENAN: Oh, you make your own...
You never tell the truth, Monsoon.
You're upset today, Brain. You've got heavy things on your mind.
I can tell. You're worried about a lot of things!
Well, it's WrestleMania. I'm excited.
I'm a broadcast journalist.
I'm just excited. I'm not concerned about a thing.
Why would I be concerned?
No reason to be concerned.
I'm here to enjoy myself.
And to enlighten the humanoids on WrestleMania.
Yeah, not nervous about a thing.
MONSOON: Shoulder delivered in the lower abdomen area.
And another one by Michaels.
MONSOON: Whoa, what a shot that was.
Irish Whip, but, no. A nice reversal by Tito.
Shoulder first. Nice leapfrog over the back, that was.
HEENAN: Hey, he's taking it to El Matador, isn't he, Monsoon?
MONSOON: Well, he certainly is. There's another nice reversal.
Well, how many times can you go to the well?
(CROWD CHEERING)
What a header he took!
And it's Tito, back in control.
HEENAN: Tell you what's good about Santana. He goes back to the same hold.
He goes back to wear a man down.
That's good, basic, scientific wrestling.
But it's not gonna work. Michaels is just too, too quick.
Tito could have been chased by bulls all he wants.
I don't care how quick he is, Michaels is gonna catch him.
MONSOON: Nice shot there, moments ago, over the, uh,
shoulder blade of Sensational Sherri.
Tito hanging on with this side headlock.
Trying to gain some kind of control in this one.
Nice maneuver.
He did not!
From my monitor, it looked like he used the hair.
Do you mind, Ape Man?
MONSOON: Well, highly unlikely that you're gonna pin anybody with a side headlock.
In all my years, I've never seen anyone pinned with a side headlock.
HEENAN: I've pinned a few people with it.
Yes.
Where? In your dreams?
I can beat you. I can beat a man a million different ways.
I had a guy give up one time during instructions.
Will you stop?
Oh! Look at this! Nice small package! Almost got him.
And back to the headlock.
And the referee was right there.
Nice positioning.
Boy, listen to her scream at Michaels.
SHERRI: Come on, Shawn, hit him! Come on!
HEENAN: Better not make her unhappy, Monsoon.
Me? Oh, look at that!
360 over the top and down to the concrete goes Tito.
HEENAN: Kind of like Air Mexico, isn't it?
MONSOON: Look at that smug look on that kisser.
Referee laying the count on Tito Santana.
HEENAN: Put the boots to him, Sherri.
Doesn't cost any more. It's a perk.
MONSOON: Don't worry, she's not beyond laying it on to somebody.
REFEREE: One! Two!
Surprised she didn't take a cheap shot.
REFEREE: One. Two. Back it up.
HEENAN: He's not in yet.
MONSOON: He is now.
Uh-oh. What was she doing there? Taking her glove off?
Backbreaker, well executed by Shawn Michaels.
HEENAN: She wasn't taking her shoe off.
MONSOON: Referee right there, once again. But a two-count
is all that Shawn could get.
And now a reverse chinlock of his own.
Trying to slow down Tito Santana.
HEENAN: You gotta lean forwards. You gotta bend that neck down.
You gotta lay all your weight on it
and immediately cut off his air.
MONSOON: I thought you were a broadcast journalist.
Now you wanna be a manager again?
No. I'm giving some insight as to the particular hold
Shawn Michaels has on El Matador.
This tremendous crowd in the Hoosier Dome
starting to get on the case of Shawn Michaels.
Starting that adrenaline flowing
through the body of Tito Santana.
Elbow in the breadbasket, another one.
And one more time.
Whoa!
Reverse crescent kick by Shawn Michaels found the mark.
HEENAN: I guess there'll be no tacos tonight. Strictly menudo.
I don't think he's got any teeth left.
Ever had menudo through a straw?
Pin him! Pin him!
MONSOON: Tito was going for that flying forearm as Sherri is screaming "Pin him!"
HEENAN: Oh.
Oh!
Oh, did he catch him.
MONSOON: Michaels going for that patented side suplex.
And Tito just bought himself a little time.
HEENAN: Things don't look good now.
Not bad. Not bad.
MONSOON: There's that flying forearm!
And it shoots Shawn Michaels right outside the ring.
HEENAN: That's that Flying Jalapeno.
MONSOON: And Tito right out after him.
Bounces him face-first into the steel steps.
HEENAN: Disqualify him, ref.
Both men outside now. Referee counting both.
Why? Tito's still outside.
Oh! Beautiful shot, using the top rope as a slingshot.
That was the Flying Burrito, in case you want to know.
The pendulum has swung the other way and it's Santana now in control.
Beautiful knee lift.
Inverted atomic drop!
HEENAN: Sherri. Sherri, do something.
Do something, Sherri.
There it is!
El Paso de la Muerte!
But Michaels rolled right outside the ring.
Would you say that was extra hot Pace Picante?
Will you be serious?
I'm surprised Michaels is even standing after that.
Scoop slam from the outside, no.
Michaels had a hold of the top rope. What was that?
(BELL DINGING)
Tito hit his head when he went down.
(SEXY BOY PLAYING)
One to nothing.
I wanna see a replay of this, Monsoon.
We're not gonna see the rest of it.
This one's over, as far as I'm concerned.
FINKEL: ...Michaels!
MONSOON: Shawn Michaels with a victory
here in the Hoosier Dome over Tito Santana.
Look at that arrogance.
HEENAN: I like it, myself.
NARRATOR: For the second straight year,
Michaels was charged with the task of kicking off WrestleMania
and setting the tone for the evening.
It was a respectable position,
but not one Shawn wanted to make a habit of.
