Best Creative Maid of Honor Speech - Call me maybe - Parody

Alright, at this time I would like to call up our Maid of Honor, Tova. Hi everyone! Thank you all for being here to support my best friend in the whole wide world, Lauren, on this special day that she marries the man of her dreams. And yes, I do mean Mike. I'm Tova, Lauren's Maid of Honor. And what an appropriate title, because it truly is an honor to be up here speaking about such an incredible couple. I don't know about the Maid part though... Anyway, when I joined USY over 10 years ago, I think my mom was hoping I would meet a nice Jewish boy... maybe find a husband, but I found something better. I found a best friend for life. I actually had the pleasure of meeting Mike on his first date with Lauren. She walked into South, my favorite bar at the age of 22, with this Tall Blue-eyed Jewish drink of water, and of course I immediately was like "Does he have any friends?" I'm still waiting on that, Mike. Relatives? Come see me after. Maid! Not Matron. Maid. Some of you may not know, but Lauren and I have a couple songs that we like to sing together, and whenever we're out, Mike has to tolerate the two of us racing to the dance floor to sing (and yes... dance) to Beyonce's Single Ladies. Well, as of today, Lauren, that can no longer officially be OUR SONG. So I have another one in mind. And even though I don't have the beautiful singing voice that Lauren has, I'm going to sing you our new song right here, right now. Take it away band! I knew its love at first sight, For me (but also for Mike) In darkness you're always light, And now you're getting hitched It's now been over 10 years, Our friendship, I'm saying cheers Because now you're switching gears And now you're getting hitched Your dress so pretty, so I'll sing a ditty And just hope I'm witty, Can't believe you're married baby! Hey, you're my best friend, And this is crazy, Here's to your future! You're married, baby! It's hard to think that you're a wifey Here's to your future! You're married, baby! Hey you're my best friend, and this is crazy Here's to your future. You're married baby! And all the other boys try to chase you Just flash them your ring- not single baby! Back in the day, USY, I met you- you were not shy As you know neither was I, and we became best friends We were both true Broadway geeks, and always dressing so chic And sharing hair-do techniques, and we became best friends So glad we stayed close, never say "adios" And so I must disclose, Can't believe you're married baby! Hey you're my best friend, and this is crazy. Here's to your future! You're married baby. Its fun to think you might have a baby Here's to your future! You're married lady. Hey you're my best friend, and this is crazy. Here's to your future! You're married baby. And all the other boys try to chase you Just flash them your ring- No Single Ladies! Before you came into my life I missed you so bad I missed you so bad. I missed you so so bad Its hard to think that you're a wifey, Here's to your future! You're married baby. Hey, you're my best friend And this is crazy, Here's to your future You're married, baby! And all the other boys Try to chase you, Just flash them your ring... Not single baby! Before you came into my life, I missed you so bad I missed you so, so bad- And you should know that You're married, Lauren! Mike, I love you and I know you will make Lauren the happiest girl in the world. And even though she's yours now, I might still claim her to sing and dance Beyonce's Single Ladies with me even though between the two of us its only half true I know you two have so many happy years ahead of you and so I'd like everyone to raise their beverage, cheers and toast, to Mike and Lauren - the newest Mr. and Mrs. Klapova! Here's to your future- you're married baby!!!