Wizards of Waverly Place S2E13 - English Transcript

Alex, can you give me a hand? I got one more piece left. Whoa! [chuckles] Ooh. You better fix that. Alex! I just went through a whole horn of unicorn glue. Do you know how many hornless unicorns are running around because of this lamp? Yes, and now they're called ponies. You remember what those were, you were scared of them until last year. I don't care what anyone says, those things are dangerous. I'll just fix it the way it should've been fixed in the first place. Red Skies at night Fix it right! [wand powering down, sputtering] Wait Alex, your wand just shorted the system out. Dad, did you forget to pay the wizard power bill? Not this time. I haven't missed once since we can pay by wand. The wizard world is experiencing rolling blackouts. - We don't have our powers?! - Just temporarily. Someone left the door open at the wizard power plant. All the dragons got out. It's gonna be a while till they get back. More importantly, why did you break the lamp? Look, we could talk about who broke the lamp, and spend all our time on whose fault it was, or we could just live in the moment, where Justin fixes it. Now, I don't know about you, but I choose to live in the moment and move on. - Who's with me? - Yeah, nobody. Justin, just fix the lamp before Mom gets back - from her spa weekend. - Da [sighs] Sleep with one eye open tonight. [mutters indistinctly] Ooh, what's that, Daddy? Spare parts for Justin's robot wife? It's a Wizinko machine. I was going to demonstrate it, but since powers are down it's gonna have to wait. What's it supposed to do? It turns two-dimensis into three-dimensional copies. Maybe it can take Justin's two-dimensional personality - and turn that into something. - That didn't make any sense. But were you hurt a little bit? - A little. - Yeah, then it made sense. * Well, you kw everything's gonna be a breeze * * That the end will no doubt justify the means * * You can fix any problem with the slightest of ease * * Yes please * * But you might find out it'll go to your head * * When you write a report on a book you never read * * With the snap of your fingers you can make your bed * * That's what I said * * Everything is not what it seems * * You can get all you wanted in your wildest dreams * * You might run into trouble if you go to extremes * * Because everything is not what it seems * * Evething is not what it seems * * When you can have what you want by the simplest of means * * Be careful t to mess with the balance of things * * Because everything is not * * What it seems * Dude, what is going on?! Did the pretty bus break down outside, or do I have another stye in my eye? No, it's Fashion Week. There's models all over New York City. Hey, maybe we can get a couple of these girls to play some Dungeons & Gargoyles with us. All right, but we're gonna need a plan. Something better than following the girls around for an hour, and just when we're ready to speak to them, we wimp out, make up some lame excuse like we're tying our shoes, and th go see a movie we've already seen four times. I don't know, bro, Robert Downey, Jr. is so good in that mov. He is so good. - You know what I'm talking about? - No, Zeke. We gotta do this. - All right. I don't want to end up the male equivalent of chicks with cats. Hey, I have a cat. We gotta do this now. Alex? I just scored the gig of a lifetime, working for world-famous designer, Mr. Frenchy. Wow. I just ate a bunch of sugar. I guess we're both having good days. Come on, this is a big deal. I was picked out of five thousand applicants to work with him. If I do a good job, it could jump-start my career in design. Imagine the whole world dressed like me. Yeah, I don't have an imagination that big. Mr. Frenchy is known for his one-of-a-kind designs, and he's trusted me with this year's newest creation. Wait, is he that dude that made that credit card dress you showed me st year? Yeah, and the playing card dress and the balloon dress Actually, the balloon dress didn't work out, 'cause there was also a dress made out of porcupine needles. [laughs] I remember that dress. It is so funny when people you don't know explode. Mr. Frenchy doesn't want anyone taking pictures of it be the show, so he trusted me with it, because no one would guess his high school intern had it. - Wow. Let me see. - No, no, no, no, no. No one sees. I need you to use magic to lock this up in a magic lock box, or a magic treasure chest or Oh, how about a gic dress vault? That would be perfect! Yeah, too bad that doesn't exist. - Plus, my powers are down. - That stinks. Well, bye. Harper I can still help you. u can keep it in my room. It'll be safe there. - OK, well, bye. - Harper? Do you really want to make me use a bunch of words to confuse you into letting me keep it? No. Here. Thank you. You jt saved us a lot of time. Are you trying to walk lik? No. Are you trying to look like a waiter at Fiesta Grande? - What's with the tray? - What's with the dress? - I asked you first. - A series of small snacks is healthier than gorging yourself at meals. Your turn. It's an original, one-of-a-kind Mr. Frenchy that Harper's trusted me with until the fashion show. You think that the best way to protect the dress is by prancing around your room wearing it? What if someone, like me, were to come along and go, "Whoa!" Justin, stop! That's not funny. Oh, but this is. [guffaws] You're right. This is funny. So funny. But you know what's nnier? How much I love my sister! Justin, no! Stop! Let me down. [gasps] Turn the music down. [slurping] Dude! When are we going to make our move? We've been sitting here forever. We're not just sitting here, we're coming up with a plan. I read that supermodels love guys who are connected. Oh! I'm totally connected. I get ten percent off at t. Why don't we hold on to that one? Follow my lead. [clears throat] [laughs] Hey. Hi. So, my dad owns this place. - Just sayin'. - He says stuff. Wod you like a free refill on one of those beverages? - Gratis. - Sure. You guys are kinda weird. I like it. Well, I get ten percent off at the Puzzle Zoo. I love the Puze Zoo. [both squeaking] [clears throat, chuckles] - My dad owns this place. - You already said that. I get ten percent off at the Puzzle Zoo. - You already said that. - Can you give us a moment? [chuckle It's goi great! No. We need something more to talk about. All right, well, I mean One more punch and I get a free smoothie. Perfect. Where'd they go? To the bathroom? Yeah. Sure. Why don't u stay here and wait for 'em. OK. Justin lied. There's no story about me in here. Hey, Alex. Hey, Harper [chuckles] I want the bad news first. How did you know what I was ing to say? I figured out your "good news, bad news" smile a week after I met you. OK, so I need to figure out a way to make "I ruined the dress" sound not so bad. You ruined the dress?! After you made me give it to you? I got the opportunity of a lifetime here, and it's about to blow up in my face. Look, we could talk about who ruined t dress You did. Or, we couldive in the moment. Now, I choose to live in the mome and move on. - Are you with me? - Only because I have to be, because you're the one who got us in trble. Great, we're moving on. It's good. Finkle. Whers my schmata? Mr. Frenchy, I need to tell you something. Your tone implies it won't be pleasant. And Frenchy's ino mood to hear anything unpleasant. I just snt an hour looking for my Bluetooth. It was in my ear the whole time. OK, then. Tell him something pleasant, Alex. We have black and white cookies today. I was hoping to hear something about my newest one-of-a-kind dress. I hope it's in a temperature-controlled room. The thing about your dress is Is That it's totally fine. She's doing such a great job. You picked the right girl for this. I guess I did, whoever you are. I knew I could count on you, Finkle. - [cell phone rings] - Oh, excuse me. I'm receiving communications. Go for Frenchy. Al, oh, my gosh. This is great. You have a plan for what to do about the dress? Yeah. Like I said, my plan is "moving on" from the dress. Moving on? You really think that's gonna work? Finkle, we're in trouble. He's on to us. I knew this wasn't gonna work. They double booked the location for my fashion show. My show is is In situations like this, I usually say, "hosed. " hosed! Mr. Frenchy, why don't you have the fashion show here? Here? I don't even know what this place is. Is it a subway station or a sandwich shop? It's one-of-a-kind, just like you. Who else would have an amazing high-fashion fashion show at a sandwich shop? Or we could have it at my house. My mom just put plastic slip covers in the living room, so we're allowed in now. But no shoes. Oh, that's great. Let's have it at the sandwich shop. - Problem solved. - Excellent. One more good idea and I might bother to learn your name. It's Alex. I'd prefer something like Daphne. Chew on it. Great, you solved that problem. But what about the dress? [sighs] I know. I know. - Moving on. - Thank you. When this place is crawling with models and his fashion show is going great he'll have forgotten all about his little dress. You're telling me he's going to forget all about his one-of-a-kind dress that he trusted me to ard with my life just 'cause there's a show going on? Wow. Someone's not moving on. [slurps] Let's go, people. We've only got two hours. And no one's even sweating. Except this guy. Hi. I'm the owner. Look, this place has never been busier. I just want to thank you for choosing my restaurant for your fashion show. Oh, so this is a sandwich shop? I just ignored the big subway car standing back there. Oh, sandwiches. No, don't eat these. They're bad. I made these a couple of days ago. Then I lost them, but then I found them. Excuse me while I pretend to take a phone call. Go for Frenchy. Oh, Alex, honey, do me a favor. Get rid of these sandwiches. They're no good. I'm all about helping. Oh, my gosh. This might actually work. He hasn't asked me about the dress. See, that's the beauty of moving on. I've got to get rid of these sandwiches. My dad said they weren't good. Or they can get rid of them for me. All right, less work for me. Good. I wish we lived in a world where you could just walk up to a model and be like, "What's up? You want to play Dungeons & Gargoyles with us?" Sure, that sounds like fun. Can my friends come? You don't play Dungeons & Gargoyles. Oh, just because I'm beautiful, means I can't be smart? Or an eleventh level cleric? - Hot. - Hot. When you guys are finished with your sandwiches, we'll go upstairs and play. - Did that just happen? - I am not sure. I'm gonna put some cologne on just in case. [scoffs] Cologne. My shower soap has scent built right in. - Three! - Uh-oh! I love this game. So you're in the cavern and you can either use - your plus three sword or - My magic missile spell. Nicely played. I forgot you had a bag of weapons. Can I just say, we're playing Dungeons & Gargoyles with models? You've said that every five minutes. I'm gonna keep saying it until it's proven not to be true. Yeah! Oh! There they are. Guys, we need the girls downstairs to get ready. No, Alex. Not till we're done. [stomach gurgles] That's a pretty awesome gargoyle noise. That's not a gargoyle noise, that's my tummy. I don't think I'm feeling too well. - Where's the bathroom? - Through that door. [retching, coughing] Uh-oh! Hearing people getting sick makes me get sick. [grunts] What's wrong with them? ! Why are thy sick?! I don't know. - Did they eat something bad? - No. All they ate were these sandwiches that Dad said didn't taste good. Did he say they didn't taste good or they were no good? - What's the difference? - [retching] Way to go. You ruined my one shot with these girls. I'm coming ladies. I got hair ties. How are we supposed to have a fashion show to distract Mr. Frenchy from the fact that we ruined his dress, when all the models are sick? Hmm. Somehow we've moved on all the way back around to the dress. [sputtering, powering up] I think I have an idea. Magic's back. Since we don't have a lot of time, we're gonna skip the part where I do magic badly, and just make it all work out. - We can skip that part? - We'll see. I just need to get one thing from Justin's room to help us. Why are we in your room to get stuff from Justin's room? Because we're getting stuff from the box under my bed that says, "Justin's Favorite Things from His Room. " I steal this stuff to make up for the times he's annoyed me. Hey, a Captain Jim Bob Sherwood lunch box. I took that one because the actual Captain Jim Bob Sherwood just died, and the price for that thing went through the roof. One poster of supermodel Bibi Rockford, and we're good to go. But how I'm tired of fighting. Let's just do it, whatever it is. We're gonna make a magical copy of Bibi Rockford. [whirring] Wow. She's even prettier in person. Thanks for taking me off your brother's wall. He was always staring at me. - Why am I still holding this? - [chuckles] This is so great. The only thing that'd make it better is if we had the newspaper dress for Mr. Frenchy. One step ahead of you. Lucky for you I took a picture of myself in the dress. Goodness, I do look good in that dress. Bibi Rockford, come on, put that dress on. We've got a fashion show to save. No. I like this dress. Alex, can I talk to you over there for a second? Sure. We brushed elbows when we were getting sick at the same bowl. It was hot and gross at the same time. Excuse me. Can someone direct me to Hair and Makeup? Oh, my gosh. Bibi Rockford. Oh, it's you. - Don't stare at me. - Sorry. Dungeons & Gargoyles? I love this game. Can I play? Do all models play Dungeons & Gargoyles? No, but all supermodels do. It's a great stress reliever from being, I don't know, super. - Where did you come from? - From Justin's room. All right, Justin! My room Sweet! Alex! Are we going to talk about playing Dungeons & Gargoyles, or are we going to go on this quest for the Gold Dragon's treasure? I'd be OK if the world ended right now. Well, you better be 'cause it might, OK? Wow, you really convinced yourself to get that dress off. I have this pressure point in my shoulder that only I know about. Come on, Bibi Rockford. We've got a fashion show to save. I'm tired of modeling. All that walking up and down, up and down. It's boring. I'd rather play Dungeons & Gargoyles. Wait a minute, Bibi Rockford is playing your game. You used magic to turn her into a geek. You used magic to bring my poster to life. Fine. I used magic. Tell her the game is over, she has to go downstairs to save the fashion show. I guess I could, but aren't you the one always saying that when things go bad, you should just move on? Pull up a chair, play some Dungeons & Gargoyles and have a big bowl of "moving on. " - Is that what I sound like? - Yes! Oh, sorry. That question was for you, Justin. Yes. If I say I'm sorry for stealing your stuff, you'll help? - Yes. - That "sorry" didn't count? - Nope. - Fine. I'm sorry. We done? I want my Captain Jim Bob Sherwood lunch box back. - Fine. - Thanks. I'm on it. Sorry, Zeke, your cloak of invisibility ripped, - you've been exposed. - Oh, my gosh, I'm blushing. - Game's over, people. - What? No way, Jose. No. Yes way. I'm behind and I'm a sore loser. See? No! You fool! What have you done? No! [sobbing] I did what I had to do, Zeke. OK Come on, Bibi Rockford, let's go. Leave my brother and his weird friend to themselves. [continues sobbing] Fine, but if I'm gonna walk the runway, so are you. [scoffs] No, that's not gonna happen. No. [sobs] Right, my friend is not gonna give up her dignity for the sake of my fashion career. She'd rather just move on and live in the - Fine. We'll do it. - Thanks! You're the best!