Breaking up over a Stupid Argument

- [Man] Okay, sure you wanna do this? - [Woman] Yeah, of course. I mean, we're gonna have to change a few of the decorations but... - [Man] Shoulda seen that coming. - [Woman] Have you read any Tom Robbins? - [Man] No, is that all you have? - [Woman] No, oh, shut up, shut up, I have other books. - [Man] You think we should get a bigger bed? - [Woman] Only if I get to pick the sheets. You wanna go get some fresh air? - [Man] Sure. Did I ever tell you how the sky got its stars? - [Woman] What? - [Man] There once was a hungry hummingbird and it couldn't find any - [Woman] Okay, stop. What star is that? - [Man] Ah, it's a-- That's Jupiter. It's not a star. - [Woman] Really, are you sure? - [Man] Yeah, here, keep checking in. It's moving faster than the other stars. - [Woman] So cool. So many planets. - [Man] Any of them could support life. Wanna go make dinner? - [Woman] Yeah. - [Man] So, you think we should upgrade to a California King? - [Woman] Is that the taller one or the wider one? - [Man] You know, I don't know. It just sounds so much better than a regular king. Are you okay? - [Woman] The alien thing really threw me. - [Man] The alien thing? - [Woman] What you said before. - [Man] About there being life on other planets? - [Woman] Aliens. - [Man] Sure, if you wanna call them that. Wait, are you actually mad at me? I'm confused. - [Woman] I'm confused. - [Man] It's just math, really. - [Woman] And there are just people out there. - [Man] Do you really think that we're the only intelligent life out there? Like, like God put us here as special? - [Woman] Really? You're gonna bring God into this? Are you just messing with me because I made you take down your Star Wars poster? - [Man] Do you really comprehend how, like, huge the Universe is and it's still growing? - [Woman] It's growing? What? How? - [Man] Do you really wanna know? - [Woman] I guess not. I don't even care about that. I just figured we were the only people. - [Man] Huh. - [Woman] Like maybe there's some bacteria out there. - [Man] Okay, that's a start. - [Woman] It's just a stupid thing to argue about. - [Man] I agree. - [Woman] Why even think about it? It's such a bizarre thing and it won't even be proven in our lifetime. It's like a thing that completely doesn't matter. - [Man] I like to think about things. - [Woman] Me too, real things. - [Man] Don't you think it's egotistical to assume that we're the only smart life out there? Like, what makes humans so special? - [Woman] So, now I'm egotistical. God damn it, you just think you're so much better and smarter than everyone. - [Man] That's not what I meant. - [Woman] Okay, well about in the opposite perspective. What about things smaller than us? Could I have an entire universe in a marble in my pocket? - [Man] Are you mocking me with a Men in Black reference? Look, scanning electronmicroscopes have already disproven that anyways. - [Woman] *** you. - [Man] Okay, I don't wanna fight with you about this. All right, I'd rather save that for something more important like whether or not we should vaccinate our children or whether you like adventure vacations or lounging vacations. - [Woman] Vaccinating. And lounging. - [Man] Duh. - [Woman] So, it's just this stupid that you insist on. - [Man] Okay, can we agree to disagree on whether or not there's intelligent life elsewhere in the Universe? - [Woman] Honestly, I don't know. We literally look at the world or Universe or whatever differently. - [Man] Oh come on. - [Woman] I mean, every time I look at you I'm gonna think you're off in your own world, considering the Universe. - [Man] It's just math! - [Woman] Everything must seem so small to you. - [Man] Fine, fine. It would take such a crazy confluence of events to create life elsewhere. It's a huge long shot that it happened once. Much less ever again. - [Woman] Did you just compromise one of your core metaphysical beliefs just to get out of an argument with me? - [Man] I guess I did. Huh. - [Man] Just Google Kepler four thirty eight B!