Intermission - English Transcript

I'm telling you. Pain-slash-pleasure. *** aching me, it is. Yeah, don't even ask about my balls. So we hold the girlfriend hostage, say we'll kill her if he doesn't do as we say. Drive him to the bank, two of us, the other stays with her... he gets us the money, we let her go. Wear masks, whatever, disguise our identity. Thing is, though, and this is the sweet, the poetic part, though, right. The girlfriend is Deirdre. You're joking? And the fella is... Her fella. That's right, the baldy ***. Are you on? - I don't think so. - What? Why don't you just ring her? Tell her you want her back. *** that. That's over now. This is the new ***. It's all a bit risky. But vengeance, man, it's not about the money. - Well, it is, but the satisfaction... - That's you, John. That's your reward. I'm sorry. - Come on. - It's too big. No, man. And I wouldn't recommend you get involved, either. I'm getting involved, all right, I'm not passing this up. - And if you were any kind of *** mate... - What? - *** you! - No, *** you, man. - If you were any use... - I am use. - Except for *** fogeys. - She's no fogey. She may be older, but she's sporty. And I'm taking exception to that description. Granny, she is. May have to break your face for you, you keep it up. - You big ***, you. - You're a ***! No, you are. Big hairy prick, you. Can't even get laid by a bird your own age. Come here, *** me. I've got you, man. Give up. You got me on the wrassling. See, when I start using my karate... - Wrassling or karate... - John! Oscar! I'm sick of this now. Come up to Mrs. Rooney's office. Put a stop to this claptrap, once and for all. Henderson! Good shot, man. Nice one, John. *** eejit. I'm not going to the hospital, I told you. Now Mr. Henderson has decided he doesn't want to bring the police into this. But you understand we're going to have to terminate your employment, John. Have you anything you'd like to say or... Go *** yourselves? No, Tony, no, it's about what I expected. I'm just so sorry it had to come to all of this. - And you go *** yourself, too. - Enough of that. No, Tony, if he hasn't even got the grace... ...or the originality to... - *** youse. - Hello. - How you doing? How are you? Look at your woman's makeup. ***. Take a chisel to get that off. Hey. Youse off the telly? - Yeah. - Put me on. - No. - Go on, youse pricks. Put me on. I'll do a dance for youse. - What do you think? Riverdance. - ***'s sake. - Okay. You all set? - Yeah. Let's get the heroic angle. The mythic shot. There's something wrong with the light here. I don't see why we can't just shoot this thing straight on. There's some sort of a shadow there that I can't seem to get rid of. That's not, I don't think, shadow. That's a moustache, Ben. That's ruining it, isn't it, Charlie? Sorry, Sally. You hear this 'mythic shot' ***? Could you step out of the shot for a minute? Just for a minute. Right, Maura. What happened when the bus went over? Who the hell... - Christ! What the ***? - What was that? Actually, Maura, can we put Sally in for this one, please? Do what you can with the moustache. Lose the low angle if you have to. I told you, if we shot simply, we'd be home by now. *** mythic shot. Sally, it'll be great. Okay, let's go. That's wanton, now. Condolences, man. Seriously. - My stereo there? - No. - My sounds? - No. At least they had taste, the ***. You gonna put this in your film, Jerry? - Hello? - Call yourself a maverick? Yeah. Then be one, Ben. Do me anyway. What? Do your own film. You have access, don't you? Cameras and all that? Sound ***? Wanna do the underbelly, don't you? You said you did. - I know. - You said you were a maverick. Well, this is how mavericks create. Outside the system. Oh, yeah. But if you're prepared for that, let's do it. - If not, well, okay, fine. - No. - Be a conformist. - No, I'd like to, it's just... Yea or nay, Ben? Yea or nay? Tonight on Little Big City... an accident could have become a catastrophe... if it weren't for the intervention of several brave passersby. One of whom we have here with us. We felt that a... well, actually, I felt that there were people... whose lives were in danger. So I jumped on top of the bus. The bus was on its side, actually... so it wasn't that high to jump on top of the bus. - Oh, my God. - What? It's horrible, Ma. Not on the bus, but in the bus. I saw it through the window. And I was frightened that there were people dead everywhere. There weren't, there was just a few cuts and bruises. - Damn. - You didn't miss much, it's only your sister. - Was she good? - Not really. She was a bit inarticulate, to tell you the truth. - I was ***. - No, you weren't. My hair was ***. Yes, I was. My moustache. I am like Burt Reynolds. *** hell. - Listen, do you mind if we stay in tonight? - What? - I'm knackered, do you mind? - Sam! Come on, Deirdre. We don't have to go out every night, do we? Every night? I pay rent here. I pay your rent on top of my own. I give you money. I treat you well. Is that not enough? - It's not what I want, Sam. - Well, what do you want? - Come on, tickles. - No. Put me down. ***. What the ***? Listen. *** this. - Oscar, I'm sorry, I... - This is too much. What's wrong with you? Jesus. It was *** at first, but my *** jaw. - Don't go, Oscar, please stay. - *** that. Look, you're better off finding someone into that ***, Noeleen. - I won't, I'll stop. - I'll see you again. - Oscar, please. I'll stop. - I'll see you again. Oscar, I won't, I'll stop. My *** jaw. It's like, I knew I had it, but I didn't care because I didn't see it. Now I see it. Now I do. I don't understand why I didn't. It's like I kept it as a badge of, I don't know... maybe of mourning or something. I don't know. Or courage. I mean, you've been through the wars, love. That's true. I've distinguished myself. What about you, Ma? You never thought of getting someone? Getting married again? I don't think I could, even if I wanted to. Your father was... - I don't know, I'd feel... - You were betraying him? No, I think he'd have wanted me to. It's just, I still feel close to him, you know? To have had someone like him in my life that special, I feel it's enough. And who could ever give me what he gave me, anyway? - What do you mean? - I don't know. His love, for one thing. My home. The times we had. We did have times, Sally. A whole load of memories. The children he gave me. My beautiful children. With or without moustaches. I feel blessed by all of that. By you, Sally. So why would I want for anything more? I'm serious, love. I know. I've been so lonely, Ma. I know you have, baby. I know you have. It's all right. Delicious, this. I can feel it doing me good already. Vitamins and ***. Carbs or whatever. Think they're in the beans. - You have any brown sauce? - Sure. Or is it the pudding? Anyway, what time is it? It's 7:30, we don't go till around 8:00. That way a knock on the door won't be too strange. Don't forget, I won't be talking. That's right. You can nod, whatever. Or grunt. Write *** down. There we go. - You scummy ***. - Want some? It's nice, man. Go on, give us a shot. It's delicious. Give us some of that. It's gorgeous. You got the gun and all, Lehiff? - Give us a look. - Here? Use your head, man. - That's not *** bad. - I'm telling you, man. I'll show youse after, all right? That's *** delish, man. Be careful, you ***. Stick on some sounds, will you, to get us in the mood. What have you got? Clannad. *** that, we'll do without. Here, look at these. I got them in the joke shop, so as we can drive the bloke to the bank. Anyone looks, they see real people, but not the right people. - Clever. - Better *** believe it. This ***, you've gotta be Stephen *** Hawking. Hawkings, which is it? Hawking. Where's your sis, Cathal? - Why? She gonna be on this? - I don't know. What would she do to get on? - She'd do anything you want, Jerry. - To the camera. To the camera, Cathal. - Would she give me a riding? - She might. - The ***. - She's not a ***. This is Wayne, Ben. Dealer. He isn't doing much at the moment on account of surveillance. That's right. Can't even take a *** in peace. Reckon he's done the odd drive-by as well. That'd be telling, Jerry. What's this? A film? *** scumbag. It's a documentary. About what? About scumbags. So tell the camera what it's like dealing death for a living. Go on. Feeding filth to these poor addicts. Fuckhole. Are you looking for a shot, man? Dislodge the champion off his podium? Reckon I can do it, Jerry. - You getting this, Ben? - Reckon I can whup you! See what I mean? ***. It's the only thing they understand, Ben. Jesus. How are you? Who is it, Deirdre? Okay, so these lads will go with Sam here. And me, the really dangerous *** of the trio, will stay with you. All right? - Good. - Okay, Sam? Good. All right? I won't. - I will. - All right, let's go. What the *** do you see in a fogey like that, anyway? Can't say he'd be too energetic sackwise. You can answer me. That chick's a bit young for you, isn't she? What would she be, 25, 26? And gorgeous. Suppose it's the old wage, though, isn't it? That would attract them all right. I'll tell you what, though, despite her material wants... I'm talking about my own wife here now, she has them. Me and her is based on more than that. Snuggle her at night. Get the old belly-fluts. Does your woman give you that? No? Or more to the point, do you give her it? - You own this place? - No. Rent? I wouldn't mind owning somewhere like here, now. It's not the best by any means... but for a man of my humble wants, you know? Is that a wok I see? Very nice. Are they worth getting? You find you have much use for it? I suppose. Have my eye on a few kitchen appliances. Woks, blenders. Feel it's time I domesticated myself a little bit. Wokked my own grub instead of always ordering in. And what kind of oil would you use? I hear olive's the best. Well, that's what I use. Right. And what are the advantages you find it has above, say... chip-pan oil or... You *** idiot. Right, now get back in there and make me some tea. Go on. All right. Go on, go. You mean that, Mick? What you said about the missus? - About getting the fluts and all. - Oh, yeah. You think I didn't? True love, man. You feel it, you feel it. What do you think? Yeah. You feel it? With Deirdre, man. I do. It gets me in here. Yeah. That's where it gets you, all right. Try and *** with me? Have to watch you like a vulture. Don't want sugar. Get me brown sauce. Brown sauce? There's something wrong with that, is there? It's the new *** business, sure. Everyone's doing it. Not a bad old morning? Hey, Sally. - Should you not be in work? - I took the day off. Thinking of leaving altogether, actually. - Yeah? - Yeah, it's *** me off, you know? What about yourself? - It's my birthday next week. - Yeah? Happy birthday. Thanks. And my mother got me one of those mall vouchers. You know, you can use it in any shop. So I'm gonna get a makeover. - Nice massage. - Treat yourself? Bit of a facial. Exactly, yeah. - Get my moustache waxed. - What moustache? Oscar, come on. You've a bit of hair there, but it's hardly a ronnie, man. Needs a bit of bleaching's all that needs. Do you want a coffee? Hey, I was just on my way up to you. What's up with your phone? Is it broke? Or more to the point... Slow down a second. More to the point, where were you last night? - Leave me alone, Karen. - What? I get you. This new man in your life, is that it? Now that everything's peaches and cream, it's dump your friends... leave them hanging, is that it? Stop a second, will you, for ***'s sake! Is that the explanation? After all the effort I put into you, the time I spent, the... - Stop, I said! - Get your *** maulers off me! Lookit, look at this. Oh, man, it's bulging. Prepare to be rich. Prepare to ***... Where the *** is he going? Sam! What the ***? Who's that? I'm sorry! Where's the bag? What the ***? Some chick. She's vicious, man. She's an animal. Look at her milling into the ***. - I'm sorry, Noeleen. - You okay? Yeah. Yes, it's okay. Retaliate, you dope. Grab the bag, stand the *** up and... Coppers. Sketch, man, skedaddle, will you? Jesus. - Get off him. Come on. - Calm down, madam, will you? - I don't believe it. Who was that? - Don't *** know. That's it now. All that risk, that work, for nothing. I promised Cathy a shed out the back. What the *** will I tell her now? You know those sheds? Store your shovels and ***. Your lawnmower. The ***? - That's the little *** who *** my bus. - So? We've gotta get back, man. - *** that. - What the *** do you mean, '*** that'? - What about Deirdre? - You're the one that loves her, you go back. I've my own mission here. Mick! Right, he's moving. - Looking for love, it's tough. - It is. - How did we get on to this? - Don't know. And it's frightening. - A lot of bad decisions you can make. - Yeah, a lot of wrong turns, exactly. Potential for heartbreak, for hurt. But you persevere. - You reckon? - Yeah. - You've got to, do you not think? - No, I do. I mean, what else is there? Exactly. What the *** else is there? Who is it? What's going on? What the *** does this mean? Where's you-know-who? Are you *** around here? Take this *** thing. What's going on, man? She got out of order. Now who's this crazy old one? *** that, *** her. Where is everyone? Don't write it, tell me. Are you listening? I'm a prick? You're a prick! If this is *** up, I wanna know how. I said talk now, man. - Who's got the money? - Why did you hit her? - Because she's a ***! - John. Now tell me. You're after blowing your cover, sure. Shut the *** up, or I'll smack you again. And don't give me any more of this mad old ***. Tell me! ***. Look what you're after making me do. *** this. Are you all right? ***, Deirdre, ***. Jesus, I'm late. They said they'd a cancellation for 10:00, but if I miss that... - You better hurry. - It's great to see you, Oscar. And, come here, if you wanna leave your job, you know what I say? Leave your *** job. Go somewhere you're treated right. Thanks for the coffee. Do you wanna go out some night? We have a hit, huh? Yeah. Respect. From one maverick to another? Professional. Get in! - What? - We're not finished yet. Come on. - You ever been in a high-speed pursuit? - No. Well, buckle up and get filming. Of all the ***. This is where we separate the men from the faggots. Film me when I talk, man. Come on, you ***, you. Is that all you got? That your best? ***. After costing me my job. - ***, where's he going? - You filming me? He's going to the country. - You're out of your element now, pal. - So are we, Jerry. Shut the *** up. I am gonna nab you directly. I'm right behind you, you little ***. I won't hurt you, come here. Step on the bumper, will you? Put your weight on it, so I can climb back. Please. Sorry, sheep. Got to put you down, man. Out of your misery. It was you, you ***! You stole my motor. You shouldn't have pissed on my legs, man. - ***'s sake, and my sounds, man! - *** sounds. You were playing them, fuckhole! You hear this *** hypocrite? Anyway, the power of certain artistes... is beyond the ken of *** like you. You just don't have the requisite Celtic soul, man. Yes, I do. That's a brave *** statement, huh? Would you like the chance to back that up? You and me. Hand to hand. You win... I let you go. Okay. Are you getting this, Ben? Come on! This episode will be entitled "Personal Justice". Come on, you *** scumbag, you, come on. Good lad. Jerry! ...over 80 miles an hour. The chase, which ended here and resulted in destruction of livestock... the vicious shoot-out and the loss of a life. Detective Jerry Lynch... a 15-year veteran of the Garda Siochána, distinguished himself... - Was it the money? - No. - To hurt me? - Deirdre. - Him? - Maybe a little bit, I don't know. - You were an idiot. You know that? Always. - I know. Always the same ***, or ever since I've known you. Taking the long way to get what you want, and *** everything up on the way. - Anything but ask, huh? - I might be refused. Anything but say what you need. You have to take that chance, John. And you're right, you might be refused, but on the other hand... You know? - Might's not definite, is it? - No. It's a vague enough term at best. Tell me what you need, John. Hey, fuckhole, look at you. Give us a look. See you, John. Sure, it's only a flesh wound. So action-***-central, huh? So tell us about it. Come on, man, tell. *** happens you can't change. You've no choice but to deal with it, adapt to it. Other ***, though, you have the choice, the means to improve your situation... and change things. That's what you do, don't you? - You do. - Try to make yourself happy. This is philosophy, George. This is life. Come on. More. Succor, you know? Satisfaction. I mean, take me for example, my handicap. Or what you might call my handicap. Snap! Hey, snap! What's up, man? I'm bricking. Relax, they haven't got you yet. They're not gonna. What did you say at the hospital? Said I was mugged and dumped in the canal. Filed a report and all. So *** it. Keep the cool, we'll be hunky. What about Deirdre? She won't say anything, you know? No, what about her and you, man? Have youse finished your little intermission? What? I'll race you. Come in here, think you're the king on wheels? - I'm the king round here. - Fine. Me. Are you chicken, pal? You afraid to face the king? - Because you're not, you know. - Not what? The king. You may be the prince. Jerry! Come in. - Did you see me on the news? - Yeah. - "Detective hero". - Yeah, I know, but come here. The way it was told is the way it has to be. I know. - You saved my life. You're the hero, Ben. - Hey. No, I mean it. As a token of my respect, no, *** that, my admiration... I want you to have these. - Wow, Fainne Lasta. - You've earned them. A warrior soul, Ben. A kindred soul. I better go empty my colostomy bag. - We'll meet again, no doubt. - Yeah. On the streets, huh? On the streets. Can I talk to you for a sec? - Hey, Maura. - Hello, John. Can I talk to you? Sure. - If you don't shut up, I will race you. - I hope so. I'll show you, you ***. Come on. I just wanna say a couple of things to you, all right? Now, I'm not asking for anything, so don't feel any pressure. - Okay. - Just listen. This is a list of things that I want... and have wanted... for a long time. Straight from the heart, no *** around. To be with you... to live with you, and to... eventually, you know, marry you. To have your child... - For me to have yours? - Yes. All my children. - However many, three, four... - Go on. To grow old with you. To know... and that's the main thing... to know, all right... that you feel the same. That's it. How hard was that? Hard enough. Well, I do feel the same. - What's wrong? - Not in front of your ma. You *** prude! They don't mind. - Will you ever cheat on me? - Never. - Will you take care of me? - Always. - Will you ever neglect me? - No. - Raise a hand to me? - No. Take a *** on me? Do you want me to? I have had enough of you. *** coming in here every night... On your marks. Get set. Go! Where are you, you grumbling old piece of ***, youse? Come on, you old ***. Oh, my leg. Default, man. Where is he? Default. There was an obstacle. Do you see this? I am the king of the world. The king of the Republic of Ireland. Saw you on the box, love. - Yes? - You were ***. Thank you very much. Thank you. And thank you because you are out of here. So, you and Sally, man. Who'd have thought? *** love her, man. Here, wait till I tell you what we did last night. Don't, man, ***'s sake. You're right. Keep it to myself, I will. - Cherish it. - That's it. Relish it, I will. So, you relish being out of a job? *** right. No getting up, no taking orders. - No Henderson. - That's the best bit. - Being free of that ***. - Absolutely. - Are you off, Mr. Henderson? - I am, indeed, Mrs. Rooney. A little R&R, as they say in the States. Isn't it lucky for some? I am the boss. I have authority. You are the minion. You're beneath. I have the power. What do I have? I'm sorry, I didn't get that. Speak up. What do I have? That's right. That's absolutely... What the ***? - Where the hell is it? - Just do it manually. Are you sitting on it? Just do it manually. This is good. You can see the nocturnal activities... No, I saw this one. Something else. Is it under you? Keep going. Come on. No, back one. Back one.