House Party - English Transcript

This is the party. Chris! You awake? Breakfast is on the table. Come eat this *** before it get cold. lt'd help if you wouldn't call it ***, Pop. lt'd help if you get your *** down and eat it. Pop, Play--Peter's having a party, and l wanted to... Finish your breakfast, boy! Yo, man, you are wrong. We're homeboys. Why you pretending like you don't want to D.J. the gig? l don't D.J. for free anymore. Plus, you never provide transportation. How do l get my turntables, records, and speakers there? Yo, man, l have the house keys and the car keys. My parents--down south, way down south. We're in. Let me rap, and then we'll consider it. You already got gonged in the school talent show. Why you want to embarrass yourself again? l've been practicing. l got dope lyrics. Def women l'm gonna be hooking you up with. This ain't no tackhead party. Def women like those. You like that? l do. Check this out. lt's Play time. Hook me up, all right? That's a weave, girl. Yo, ladies, ladies. l know y'all gonna be in attendance... at the super-def, throw-down jizzam of the year. Sharane, you hear anything about a party tonight? Not any good ones. Yo, wait a minute. Don't even try and play me. l'm not beggin' either one of y'all. -You have before. -You will again. Listen, you know the address. 10:30, and you can bring some friends. Hey, don't play. Since you're not into sharing, l'll get my own. While you're over there, give the ladies my regards. Right. Stab, l'm really sorry. l'm sorry. l'm really sorry. No, don't get up. l'll get you another milk. l'll pay for it myself. You need a milk? l'll be right back. lf l was you, l'd kick his ***' ***. Damn. You went out like a sucker. So if l throw with them, you got my back? Of course. You know that. l'm your man. You know l'm gonna take-- -Hi, Kid. -Hi. You finished? We were about to sit with you. l was gonna sit a little longer, so you should. Are you really not coming to the party tonight? Why? Should we? lt's up to you. lf you weren't going, l'd probably skip it, too. l think you should go. -We'll probably see you there. -Maybe. You should be nice to him. You started it. "Why? Should we?" Shut up. Anyway, l was over there, right? That's twice. You conscious ***. You got a sleepwalking problem, we can fix it. We'll break your legs and kick your *** ***! l'll break my leg off up in your *** so far... you'll *** sneaker for a month. -l've done it before. -He'll do it again. Why you sweating me, man? You're wrinkling my school clothes. "You're wrinkling my school clothes." Yo, wait, wait. What's the problem? Your mama can't afford no iron? Tell her to come on over to Stab. l'll put her on the stroll. She can save up, get one. He can't *** with you. Watch out, man! Watch it! This punk *** throwing *** at us. l smell something, man. l definitely smell something. l smell ***! -He's a ***, man! -Kick his ***! How you like that, boy? Do it, do it! Go, go, go! Wait, wait. OK, now! OK, fellas! What you got to say now, punk? Your Shaolin technique is very good. He thinks we're joking-- Homeboy, you all right, man? lt's over? Kid, we had your back. Yeah, way back. Damn. l'm sorry l almost hit Mr. Wilson with the Jell-O... but Stab called my mother a ho. You see, my mother's dead. l'm very sorry about your mother, Christopher... but you can't fight because you have a chip on your shoulder. You're a good student, so go back to class. But your father will have to be notified. As for you, young man... l'm tired of seeing you in this office. Could you tell me why in God's name... you called his mother a garden tool? How mad could he be? Maybe the school didn't even call him. l'm so glad you're home. Sit down. l need to talk to you. What's up, Pop? l'm making some *** Gregory. You want some? No, thanks, Pop. You know l need this stuff, boy. l got a weight problem. Can't wait to eat. Pop, are these the only... pieces of mail you got today? Just some bills. You want to pay them? What? Bila? Bilyle? Whatever your name is, what you want? lt's for you. l'll take it upstairs. Why they name that boy that African name? They from Cleveland. Yo, what's up? Kid, have you talked to Play? l been calling his house. Nobody answers. He was supposed to come pick me up. l haven't spoke to him. l'm really sweating this pink slip from school. lf Pops finds out l got in trouble in school today... l'm definitely gonna be on punishment. You're still worrying about that? lf you ain't got a letter yet... then they'll call your house after 5:00. That's when they expect your parents to be home. ***. What do l do? Just leave and don't come back till after the party. l still got to get dressed. l can't come to the set stinking. Throw some Brut on and meet me at the party. Chris, get off the phone and come down here. l got to jet. l'll see you tonight. All right, man. Peace. Don't tie up the telephone talking to your friends. l'm expecting a call for some overtime. OK, Pop. There's a party at Play--Peter's house. -Can l go? -On a school night? l'll make sure l'm back before curfew. Oh, man. l had plans for us tonight. l rented a couple of videos. "Dolemite." You like "Dolemite." You grew up on it. All right. lf you got to, you got to. But after you finish your homework. No problem, Pop. What's wrong with you? Don't like "Dolemite"? "Way down in the jungle deep... "bad-*** lion stepped on the signifyin' monkey's feet." Toe to toe, Kid 'n Play is on a roll again lt's only right that we keep the crowd dancin' Rhymes are dope, the tempo is steady You ready? Let's rip up the floor like confetti Y'all, l got a great new album in the mail today. Onyx Communications and Hey Love Productions... proudly present "Hey Love." All the commercials they showin' nowadays. God. Every TV station. Cut the television off, comin' through the damn walls. The incomparable Delfonics and much, much more. l got to get this fan fixed. lt was so hot in here last night... l saw the devil sittin' in the living room. ***. *** ain't gonna break my mama's good stuff. Let 'em *** with this plastic. What up? Play Martin in the place to be. The place to be is my house an hour ago. lf you want a D.J., stop smokin' that crack... and drive your mother's raggedy-*** Chevy over here! Chill, man. l'll jet over in one minute. l don't like fooling with you, man. Come on now, Play! All right! l love you. Kid, answer the door! Answer the door. l'll get the phone. Yeah, what's up? l sure was depending on that overtime. Give me that letter. Are you retarded? No, l wasn't talking to you. Crazy mophead boy of mine. Ready to cut his hair off. Look like a young tree stump walkin' around here. What's old James up to? Let me call you back later. l got somethin' to take care of. Can you explain this? He called Mom out a name. Don't you think it's been long enough? l am sick of you using your mother for an excuse. l wasn't using her as an excuse. Then why didn't you tell me when you got home? Why you try to hide it? l didn't think it was important. No? Your school thought it was important. You'll spend tonight thinking about your priorities... after you finish your damn homework. You said l could go to the party. Them hoods you fought with will be there... and you don't need no more trouble. lt's not that type of crowd. All my friends will be there. l don't care if Marvin Gaye will be there. You won't! You don't know how to act no way. Last time, you didn't come in till l went to work. lf you let me go this time, l'll be back before curfew. lt'd be different if Peter's parents were there. l wouldn't mind you going. But they ain't. They work nights just like l do. Matter of fact, them folks is out of town. You kids think you slick, don't you? Every little step you take will be around this bedroom. Believe it. You're not goin' nowhere. You're gonna make me a social misfit. l'm tryin' to make you a responsible person. But l am responsible. Listen, get your act together. Keep your mind on them books and off them gals. 'Cause you will make the same mistake l did. Look, l'm sorry. l'm sorry. l shouldn't have said that. l'm sorry. l'm under a lot of pressure. l'm sorry. But you ain't goin' to that damn party. l don't give a damn what you say. That's why l hate messin' with them. We got to get going. No time to waste. Who's that in the car, Play? That's a honey. l know what you're thinking. That ain't for you, but there'll be a lot more. We can't fit a lot of equipment... and three people in that little-*** car! You don't know how to load things scientifically. Leave it! You're tearing my ***! Don't! ***! What the-- Just leave it alone! Don't! Play, leave it alone! Just leave it! l'll do it! Leave it alone! Hey, l'm--Hey! There it is. We got it. Where am l supposed to sit? Get out! She's gonna walk! She's gonna walk! Of course you can fit. Try the other side. You can get in right over-- Excuse me one minute. Yes, baby? l don't even appreciate how you treatin' me. l'm real sorry, baby. l do appreciate the way you look. No. Don't touch me! l'll tell you what. l'll run this over to my crib and be right back. Be right back? Kiss my ***! You gonna take my equipment and leave me? No! l ain't goin' for it! What else can l do? Kick that *** to the curb and let me ride. l'm the D.J., man. Who you callin' a ***? Your mama's a ***. -My mama ain't no ***. -lf l am, she is. l'll kick your ***! l'll fight a girl! l know. l seen a couple beat you. l can't. lt would be cold. Besides, she's packed in real good. Look, no. You know what, man? l *** up today. l owe you one, and l'll be right back for you. -No, you ain't. -He's got nerve. l'll kick both of your ***. Play, don't play. Don't do that! Don't drive off! l'll say it calmly. Maybe l was hollering. Play, don't play. l love you! Play! Damn! Hold on, man. Somebody's at the door. lt's Sidney. Yeah, she's a trip. You know who she is. You like her. Go ahead and wait in the living room... with your big nose. Punk. Hi, everybody. No, man, l said 12:00. l didn't say 8:00. l ain't going to no party at 8:00. -Sharane! -l'm coming! There'll be fine women at the party. Why bring a girl with you? The incomparable Delfonics and much, much more. This is a fantastic album. Let me borrow it. No, my brother. You've got to buy your own. Come on, girl. l said l was coming. You always rushin'. Whazzup? My nails are wet. Let's go outside while they dry. Leave her at home, man. She's ugly. l can't wait to do that dance. You know the one we been doin'? Wait, l'm comin' back out. You move, you lose. -Come on, Sharane. -Bye. She gets on my nerves. l don't know if l like my outfit. Why? You matchin'. l think l match too much. l told you about them Garanimal outfits from K-Mart. Why you tryin' to dis me? Want some Kool-Aid? Peanut, bring us two glasses of Kool-Aid. You know l'll ask you to borrow that tomorrow. -There ain't no more. -Make some. l won't give it to you. -Sharane! -What? -Grape or red? -Red. Peanut, fix me some of that *** Gregory. Who's supposed to be there? Play... Dragon-breath Bilal. And your man, Kid. You go, girl. Yours. Don't even try it! That is your man! l don't know why you keep sweatin' him. He got a cute thing happenin'. He's just so young-actin'. He needs to chill from hangin' with his crew and grow up... then maybe l'll give him some. You ain't givin' nobody nothin'. -Don't even try it! -Watch. And l'm gonna give you details blow by blow. l'm gonna get my coat. OK. Bye, everybody. Bye, Grandma. You drink that, Peanut. We out of here. Look at all that sugar. Just thinkin' about that stuff makes my teeth hurt. That's good, girl. What you talkin' about? Way down in the jungle deep... the lion stepped on the signifyin' monkey's feet. The monkey said, "***, can't you see?" "You're standin' on my *** feet." B-love, yo, bust it! What's up, cuz? Bet you thought l cut you, but l came back as promised. l ain't goin'. What do you mean you ain't goin'? Read my lips. l've been waiting an hour to tell you l'm not going. You're just a little upset-- This is why l don't D.J. for free. 'Cause *** don't be appreciating ***. -l don't appreciate nothin'? -No, you don't. Man, take a look in that car. There's too many for me to handle. They all goin' to the party... and all they asked was, "Who's the D.J.?" So l brought them over... so you could jump-start before the other brothers. ls that supposed to convince me? Ladies, B-love's in the house. Dragon-breath. Who you talkin' to? Look at this hair. Eraserhead! Where you going? Why do you want to know? We'll ask the questions, you answer them. Yes, sir. Want to check him for lD? We're out of doughnuts. What? Jesus, let's go. You watch yourself, understand? 'Cause we are. Thank you, Cagney and Lacey. Hey, what are you doing? My rhymes! Roll it back! Smash him ! Kill him ! Get him ! Get him ! Yeah, baby, yeah. Whose *** is this, baby? Who? Whose ***, baby? ***. You fine ***! Oh, ***. You fine ***, you. Come here! Give me that ***! ***! Yeah. Right there. Right there! Let me see! Let me see! Yes, baby! Right there! Yes, baby! Yeah! Oh, ***! There he is-- What was that? Jive ***! Stay away from this ***' window! ***' peep-freaks. Yo, wasn't that Kid? Was it? l got to get to the party, man. Ain't no room in here anyway. That's cold. Hi. Aw, man. Oh, ***! Here's another dusty one for you dusties. Hope you all got your Medicaid together. Who's that? Hey, Pops. What they got you doing? What's to it, man? Playin' for the elephant graveyard, man. Dead tired. lt's a gig, man. What you got in the crate over there? Some Platters, lnk Spots... Mills Brothers, Count Basie, Big Joe Turner. Slap some of them old sides on the turntable... get a little scratchin' and mixin' goin' on... l'll grab the microphone, and we can get busy. Do that again. You just grab... Let's kick his-- Chill. The punk is mine. Kick it, Pops! One, two. One, two. Hey, everybody, my name is Kid. How y'all feelin'? Just throw your hands in the air. Just wave your hands in the air! Come on! Wave your hands in the air! That's right. Throw your hands in the air, all right? Wave your hands in the air. Throw, throw... Oh, dear! Get the hell back there! You want to see how crazy l am? What you lookin' at? Yo, Mandingo, leave the brother alone. Sucker, you want another part in your head? Lighten up. Yeah, l did it. l might cry two tears in a bucket. *** it. Let's take it to the stage. Sorry, sir. Look, Officer, it was just an accident. We don't want to press charges. They've been in a few accidents this evening. l don't think you should let this slide by. They need discipline, not solitary confinement. That's true. Thank you very much. Too scared to make a statement. -They're not gonna talk? -Nope. They're not gonna press charges? You perpetrators were very lucky tonight. Apparently these people aren't gonna press charges. So you're gonna get up, go home, and go to bed. But before you do... l want you to repeat after me. What? l am... What? l am ! Come on, with feeling. l am... somebody. somebody. Oh, really. This is ridiculous. That's good. Now get up and go home. Beat it! Hold it! Let him go. You go that way. ***! The place to be. -Got some gum, man? -No. Groove! What's up, Play? Chill! Herman, man. Make yourself at home. Too many hard-legs here. Need more women. LaDonna! How you doin', baby? Lookin' real good. How about giving me those digits? Step off. Baby, l'm taking you places, meetin' people. -Clinton, homes. -What's up, money? Glad you could make it. l want you to meet my lady, um... Benita. lt's a pleasure to meet you. l hope l have the opportunity of dancing with you later. We'll see about that. LaShay, how you doin'? Don't you have any refreshments? Some soda or potato chips? You should've got here earlier. l had everything. Liter bottles, potato chips, the whole shebang. Brothers went through it. l always get here too late for the snacks. There's a store right up the street. Anything you want. Help yourself. Mama should have fed you before you got here. This ain't no soup kitchen. Yo, what's up, man? What's up? Glad you showed up. What's with your pops? How much more trouble can l get into? A beat-down's a beat-down. Let me announce you. Y'all, look who fell into the gig! l got to go. Make yourself at home. Put my stuff in its spot. You got it. What's up? What up? What up, B? How you livin'? Coolin'. Cover the labels. *** can't bite your ***. That's smooth. You brought the mike? Yeah, but look, man, it's for Play. lt's his party. Only he can rap. That mumble-mouth ***? l'm the one with the dope lyrics. l got to go for mine tonight. *** that. Get my lyrics together. Man. Work, Sharane! Where you at? Go, girl! Chill, don't bump the table. l appreciate it. Play something l can dance to, and l won't. Don't bump the table. l'm tryin' to mix. You call that mixin'? l just helped you out. Thank you! Next time l'm just gonna *** him up. What the... What the hell's going on here? Shut up all that damn noise! This ain't "Soul Train"! Where's Don Cornelius with his stiff neck? You shut up all that damn noise. l paid $15,000 for this house. Who else is over there, Public Enema? What's his name? What the hell is a public enema anyway? Walter. Brother, you by yourself. What's wrong? Maybe that big water head you got. Shut up all this damn noise! Hey, baby. You have got some nice ones. Baby, shut up. l'm just playing with the kids. You should find out what she eatin'. Y'all shut the hell up down there! l got something for you. You stay right there. Ain't this a ***? What are you doing? -Callin' the police. -For what? They're driving me crazy with this damn noise. You makin' all the noise. l got the wrong number, too, baby. Hold on one second. Dance now with your big ***. 911? l'll hold. Scandalous! Sharane, man. That girl is Nubian. She's the finest girl in here. That ain't hard in here, but still... l'm getting those digits. Don't play yourself. You ain't got no rap. She don't know that. Sweet daddy! Why you ***-blockin' me? lt ain't like that. We go way back. l used to go with her in third grade. -l don't remember that. -For three days. Why you trippin'? Just make sure we don't trip on the dance floor. Why these cops keep sweatin' us, man? They always ***' with us. They're gone, man. Damn. Look at us, fellas. This is not right. We're nervous and tense. Cop cars follow us, and we just go to pieces. -This ain't us! -This ain't the way. l know there's a reason behind all this. And l know what the reason is. All because of some ***, head-like-a-rocket... stick-your-finger-in-a-socket, punk *** named Kid. That's who l mean! Ever since this fool came into my life... l can't do nothin' but see him, man. l'll be alone with my woman sometimes... damn near ready to wax that ***... and all l can do is vision this fool. -Word? -Word. l don't know about that. l know when it comes to my *** action... all l can think about is the ***. He must have a mental block or something. Pee-Wee, you know what l mean. -l was jokin'. -l'll drop you like a bad cold. Why don't you chill the *** out? l'm gonna put a serious bum-rush into effect... and we in the house. l get it. We'll be housin' the party. We'll make it like a real house party. -We be housin' ***. -Word. Officer, l spent $15,000 on my house. l don't want no *** Public Enema around here. Yes, sir. Shut up, old man! Your *** are old. Mr. So-and-so'll be right over. Just hold on one second. 4789. Come on over, God damn it! What you mean, don't curse at you? You're cursin' at me! *** you, too! All that *** noise. You wouldn't believe the skirt this girl has got on. lt's two inches above the thing. Damn. Hi. Let's do this, girl. The time is... l'm sorry. l just finished dancing. Why girls be gettin' tired real quick? lt's hot in here. My hair is through. Put some use to them corns on your feet. Maybe later, OK? You done turned down thirty brothers. Don't make me walk all the way back there... after climbing from around the D.J. table... crossing the room, obviously to ask you to dance. l'll be the object of ridicule. There's a lot of girls not dancing. Want to know why? Because they are homely. They need to be home getting beauty sleep. What you think they say about you? You heard something? Oh, no. Sharane! Kid, what's up? -You enjoying yourself? -Definitely. l've known you too long. What's that look in your eye? Scheming on Sidney or Sharane? Actually, l had my eye-- Sidney's for you. Sharane wants me. -She does? -Every day. Besides, with your father... you can't deal with no project girl. You gonna ill out on a girl from the projects? You got it wrong. With a father like yours, you have no privacy... no car, and no money for a motel. You see my point? With a project girl, someone's always home... and that's gonna mess with your datin' time. Mating time. Know what l'm saying? How's it look watching television with Uncle Fester? -lt's Uncle Otis. -Whatever. But Sidney has a home. A house with a rec room. You know what time it is. Go downstairs. Sofa bed. You're in. -Why you playin' me? -l'm not-- Just 'cause you don't have nice stuff at your crib... don't mess with my mother's. Your liver gonna shrivel up like a prune. lt's hot. Become a man, come on. Some of this. No, man. You better slow down yourself. That monkey oil is gonna mess you up good. l tried to tell him. Kid, you my man... but l tell you you'll be out on the sauce... if you're not down with this. This stuff makes your *** hard. l'm talking ***-diesel, baby. Do that dance step you was doin' out there. l've been trying to get that all night. -l don't feel like it. -Come on! l'm really not in the mood. Don't do it, then. l'll learn on my own. Wait a minute. Don't give up so easy. l knew you wouldn't go out on me. l'll teach you. Cool, man. This is very complicated. -What are you doing? -This ain't aerobics class. You can't do it. -ls that a challenge? -lt is. -You better come on out here. -Come on. And look, drunk. -Shall we do this? -Let's do it. Don't be movin' me. They went to the Rerun dance school. Go ahead. What you got? Switch! Switch! Switch! Bilal, switch again! Come on, man, switch! Did you see how Kid was all up on me? On you? He was so far up on me, l could not move. Wait a minute. You said he was young-actin'. l did. l also said he was cute. Switch! l do everything l can for him, and he don't come home. He must be crazy. He don't pay no bills around this house. l'll give him another minute, and that's it. What's wrong with this watch? Minute don't take that damn long. ***. l know where he's at. l'll kill him when l see him. l should have never married that white woman. Hold it right there. ***. Where are you going? l'm minding my ***' business. Do you have a problem with that? Again with the questions. What is this, "Jeopardy"? lt ain't "Jeopardy," or Monopoly, either... and l ain't going to jail. -Freeze! -God damn. Y'all sound like a set of bookends. Put your hands on top of your head. Lean back. l know why you stopped me. 'Cause l'm a poor black man in a black neighborhood... and y'all just want to bust my black ***. -No. -You look suspicious. Ain't that a ***? You look suspicious and definitely black. Turn around. Your wife likes it. We're responding to a 415 in the neighborhood. You could be coming from that disturbance. The only ***' disturbance is you ***' with me. Don't think l can't read no badge numbers, chump. Boyd and Warnarski. l'll turn your *** in. That's enough, OK? Watch your attitude, pal. -Ain't that a ***? -Go home. *** you. Officers of the *** law. -Go. -l'm not ready. Go on home, pal. You don't know who you *** with. l'm from a small town called "Fresh Off A Cop's ***." You make me homesick. l'll find that damn boy. Head like a whisk broom. Sharane and Sidney, the two finest women in here. How could a man choose? He better choose right. lt's like that? Sharane, you are crazy. l really like that outfit you got on. lt likes you, too. -And you got the boots. -You like my boots? Look at your hair. lt looks so nice. You got the braid and everything. That's my jam ! Check out this mix, boy. Yo, Sharane. Dope. Yo, baby. Let's do it, darling. Want to dance, baby? Damn. -Like to dance? -No. You sure you don't want to dance? l'm quite sure. Can l sit down? lt's a free country. When l saw you turn that other guy down... l knew that the odds were against me. Don't take it personal. l didn't take it personal when you asked me after Sharane. What's your middle name? LaToya. Sidney. That's a nice name. You sure you don't want to dance? l'm still tired. My feet. Your feet. Your mother should buy you a bigger shoe size. That would help. That outfit you got on is really nice. -Pierre Cardin? -No. l knew it wasn't Pierre Cardin. All right, fellas, it's time to go to work. You sure you don't want to dance? Maybe on a fast song. l'm really not into slow songs. -Whazzup? -You want to dance? Can't you see l'm talking to my girl? l should have sat out the last one like you did. l'm about to die. -Ready to go yet? -What's wrong? You can't go until you give me what you owe me. -Owe? -Just a dance. lt's late. We're ready to go. Let's just dance right now. l usually don't dance on slow records... but l will if you won't grind on me. Come on. Don't be feelin' on my butt. You so soft and comfy, like my Hush Puppies. You so warm and fluffy like a buttermilk biscuit. Shoot. You make me want to squeeze tighter and tighter. l ain't gonna lie. You make a *** want to sing. Always and forever Each moment with you ls just like a dream to me and you That somehow came true Honeys. Oh, yes. Yo, fellas! lt's cool. What's the problem? No problem. No hoods allowed at my party. -Hoods? -That's right. Why don't y'all go rob a liquor store? Why don't you quit playin'? lf l'd known you were coming, l'd have had metal detectors. -That *** is real funny. -Real funny. Don't touch my body, man. Big man. Don't touch his body. Look at that. Bunch of punk ***. You smell something? l definitely smell something out here. l smell ***! Forget this, man. Forget all these chumps. We would smell like *** to a bunch of dicks! ***! lt's cool. Forget this, man. l don't want to hang out with this sucker set. What l'd like to do is hurt that punk Kid. lf you was a real man, you'd come out here... and we'd squash this! That's right, punk! Get him when he's alone. l told you. Too many people around, man. l'd really love to come out and play with you... but l'm busy right now with your girl on my lap. ***! Your shoulder OK? *** this, man. We can't let them get away with that. See what happened? We ought to go back and kick some ***. We just got dissed by some punk ***? We got dissed by some ***. ln front of their girls. l ain't goin' out like that. Cool. Finally, a program l'm with. Whatever this is, l'm with it. l hear that. We bust their *** as they run out of the burning house. Let's get moving. Burning house? Hold up for a second. l was talking about kicking some ***... not burning people up. Now you're going too far. Y'all frontin' on me? Wait. Do l smell ***? l ain't no ***. Shut up! Squash that! Come on! What's wrong with him? Come on! What's the matter with you? Why you want to burn people up? Come on, come on. What's up with the mike? Easy! Thank you. Play and Kid got an urge... to make a fool of themselves in public. Hey, wait a minute, baby. Let me show you how to hold a piece of steel. -Scared of you. -You should be. -Go on. -l will. One, two. One, two. Give me a little volume on this microphone. Let's get this party jumping. All the ladies, all the ladies All the ladies in the house say ow Say ow Come on, come on Homeboys, make some noise l said, homeboys, make some noise Let me hear you say ho Say ho, ho The roof, the roof Y'all like that old prehistoric stuff? We don't need no water Let the *** burn -Say what? -Burn, ***! l don't believe this. Didn't the Sugarhill Gang do that rap? The roof is on fire We don't need no water Let the *** burn Who got a light? How about a Bud Light? -***. -Get in there. ***. *** you toy cops, man. -Don't call it in. -Why not? Why bother with the paperwork? We can handle this ***. What do you got in mind? Let's take them down to the docks. Nobody can hear them scream. ***! lt's the P-L-A-Y Just here to say hi Asking you may l tell you about the day l Picked up a microphone, a pad, and a pen? The legend of the champ begins The party host with the most Giving you a dose, see? Leaving instructions, so listen closely Two lines forming Make sure you step soon Fellas at the back door, girls by the bedroom The name is Play, don't dare play me cheap The microphone is a broom And l'm going to sweep you off your feet With feelings that you never felt Another notch in the belt lt's no secret l like to freak with the best of them Then head to the stage in a test of men And when it's done and said and said and done Play's gonna be the victorious one Dope, ain't it? l know. -Give me that mike. -You want some? lt's my turn. l'm never 'fessin', possessin' the tools That it takes to rock l think it's time for the new kid on the block With a style that's wild, yet so unique l can't be stopped from reachin' my peak Because givin' my all, that's how l got to live lt's my prerogative, so you know l gotta give More for the dance floor, and l'll make your brain sore Kid's revvin' and buzzin' just like a chain saw One look, you'll say, damn, man, that Kid needs a grand, man 'Cause l bust a handstand on "American Bandstand" With ease, l please and make your mind freeze Straight out the Eighties, right into the Nineties Givin' you the highs and lows like a drama And if the mike's got juice, you know, l'm a-keep wailin' You know l'll have you starin' a while Because the Kid's much more than hair and a smile There it is, the hype ***. You think you all that now? Yup. And then some. Bust it. lt's my party, and l rhyme if l want to Be careful and don't you step to the front to Dis, 'cause l'm gonna dismiss with a def kiss And make you sorry that you ever stepped to this Microphone wizard, so come on, place your bet ls it gonna be me or Eraserhead? Why put your money on a sorry old poor thing When you can get behind a sure thing? And that's me, the capital "P" on the hype tip One false move, and you'll get your *** whipped Just tell me how the rhymes and the cuts sound You won't start feelin' the pain till you touch ground Boy, you goin' way out, l'm ready to serve you lf you can stay out past your Pop's curfew Look at him, already a has-been Let Uncle Play say a rhyme that'll tuck your *** in Am l paid or what? You some kind of foul, you know what l'm saying? Once again, the boy blows smoke about what he want to be But it isn't and wasn't, and it ain't never gonna be Possible, 'cause l got lots of pull And when you rhyme, whoo, there's lots of bull When it comes time to step to a mike l don't sit around Play, you know l don't kid around So come with it, boy, don't even hide your best 'Cause Kid spelled backwards describes you best Look around, watch the people clap hands in unity As the momentum swings from you to me You issued a challenge, yeah, you threw it up Step to the stage, too late, l blew it up The knowledge to build, just filled with excellence You heard the rhymes, you've been petro ever since There's no missin' the words that l laid out You didn't play, you just got played out Anything y'all could do, l also could do... but l could also do it better. What the... Oh, baby. The police been here... and they still down there dancing. Come back to bed, Harry. Harry? What's up? Enjoying yourselves? Damn, Groove... why you got to play the alky role at my party? Man, l told you to go way over there. You bump this table again... l'm going to kick your *** heart out. l've been looking all over for you. Help me haul this fool home. You're doing a great job. Why you hang out with that sucker? That ain't important. This is. Would you help me haul this fool home? l told you don't invite him. Groove! Get up, man. Let me go, man. The turf! Excuse me! Watch your back! Groove might throw up! We're ready to go home. Want to come? OK. My pops wants me home by 11:00, anyway. -11:00? -Not 11:00. 11:30, 11:35. Did you see where Play went? l saw Chill and Play carrying Groove home. He promised us a ride home. l don't mind walking you home. lt's not as good as a ride, but... Cool. l think Sidney's ready to leave anyway. Kid said he'll walk us home. We'll go get his coat and your purse. Aren't you going to wait for Play? Don't be up there all night. Kids got it easy nowadays. My father said, "Stay your *** at home..." you stayed your *** at home. Wait till l find him. l'm going to kill him ! You're drunk as a fish. Come tomorrow, you the first one in church. Who said something about church? l see the light l see the light l don't want to see nobody. Let's go. James, is that you? -My boy here? -No, sir. Who's he? You know who he is. -He in here? -No. You ought to be ashamed, messin' up these folks' house. Know it ain't paid for. Y'all in here doing some wrong! Bilal--whatever your name is. Sounds like something you catch on your feet. You seen my boy? l haven't seen him, sir. You sure? You ain't seen him? Why don't you go home and watch the late show, Pops? Why don't you go home, little test-tube baby? -What's your name? -Clinton. -Clinton what? -Clinton X. Clinton X? Yeah, Clinton x. l'm a Muslim. Get me two bean pies and a pork chop sandwich... you little trout-mouthed heathen. Oh, how you doing? l should've known you was here. Saw the drippings outside. With your Jheri-Curl, better never do a crime. The police would have no problem finding you. Follow the drip. No problem finding you. Bilal, where's the boy at? Upstairs? ls the boy upstairs? Wait! Play told me to make sure nobody went upstairs... 'cause his parents just got new carpet. And he don't want nobody with *** on their shoes-- -Did l say "***"? -You did. You talking about my shoes? No. Nobody can walk around up there. l understand. So nobody been up there? Ain't nobody up there. l don't play. l don't play, either. l ain't got time to play games with you damn kids. He got to come home sometime. l'll be waiting on his monkey ***. Get out of the damn way. l'll be like a security guard, waiting for him. Get out of my way. Look. Just make yourself at home. What's Play's mama doing with this dress? She ought to give this to me. lt does look kind of nice. Let me help you with that dress, huh? What do you think? Hold. What you doing? Helping you with the dress. You got to take things slow at first. -Kid, your-- -What? Nothing. l just came to get my pocketbook. We was about to get it. And now we're not. Now l know it's time for us to go. Let's go out the back way. l told Play l'd help clean up. l don't want to run into him. You'd run into a lot more than Play out front. What are you doing on Friday? l don't know. Why don't you call me tomorrow? A lot of guys get nervous in the projects. Why would they be punks like that? After Mr. Williams' son started sniping people from the roof... guys drop me off on the corner and tell me to call them. l shouldn't make plans for this weekend. lt depends if my father lets me off punishment... for getting into that fight at school. Friday may not be good for me, either. We'll talk tomorrow in school. -Come on, now. -Don't beg. Later. Good night. l'll be back. Do l detect jealousy? Why tease him? "Let's get together Friday." Didn't you say the same *** to Play? One's in trouble, the other one's available. l'm just playing averages. They're friends! Cute ones always travel in packs. But why is old ugly Bilal with his breath... hanging out with them? l can't believe you're acting like this. What? Let me tell you something. Life is short. lf you want something, let the chips fall. You're mad because you didn't catch one. That may not be by accident. You didn't like him till he was up on me. That is ***. He was up on me first. Why you think l didn't talk to him... even though l knew you were playing him? Then you put him all up in my face. l'm out of here. l don't want to hear it. He's still got to walk you home, right? lf you think l'm *** him, try and take him. -l ain't like you. -That's why you're mad. -Ho. -l heard you. What's wrong? You don't have to walk me home. -l don't mind. -l kind of do mind. You beefed at me all night. What did l do to you? You didn't do anything. lt's just l want to be alone. l don't think that's a good idea... so l'm going to bug you all the way home. You should be heading home yourself. Why? l'm already in trouble. Might as well have fun now and suffer later. l can only die once. Yeah, but punishments are forever. That's true. One time my father put me on punishment for a month... because l came home late from a party. l still get depressed thinking about that. Think about it when the time comes. My pops is cool, but he's too overprotective. l heard about your mom's passing. l'm sorry. Yeah. That was a while ago. What do your folks do? My dad owns a couple of grocery stores. l know y'all been snacking down. Crazy chips and dips. My mom works in a bank in bookkeeping. At least you got a job when you graduate. But l'm going to college. So am l. l already started checking out the applications. Really? Aren't those applications confusing? Especially those lvy League schools. l ain't getting all that far yet... lvy League or nothing like that. What's up, fellas? You didn't take all the women while we were gone? -A few. -Right. -Someone is living foul. -This *** here. Take care of that, please. Did y'all two watch the stuff like l asked? Because if a brother like Play get vict... l'll have to do some body and fender work. There was some *** clocking your ***. Was they clocking it as hard as you should be clocking... them bugs dropping out of your hair? *** got hair like Bob. -Bob who? -Bob Wire, ***. Real funny, man. You're crazy. Who broke the toilet? l don't know. Don't play me like this. Who broke the toilet? lt was like that when l came in here, wasn't it? Bet it was that *** in the leather jacket. -He could *** some bricks. -Neck like Mike Tyson. "Play, when's your next party?" l put you in my house, and you dog me. Look at the log in that ***. l got to do something before my mother gets back. l'd help you, man, but l got my new kicks on. See the next time l throw a party! l'm sorry, man. l'm out of here. Y'all out of here? l got a better idea. Bust it. Party's over. What? Don't say nothing to me, man. When you see me in the streets, don't say nothing. l ain't no plumber. Step! l didn't even ***. -That's cold. -Just step. -Peace, man. -Damn. ***! Hold up, OK? Good. l beat them home. You girls scheme on a level guys don't have a clue about. l'm glad you let me walk you home. You're all right. You pretty chill your damn self. Did you kiss her? Did l kiss who? Tonight. Did you kiss Sharane? No, l didn't. But you wanted to. Well... But l didn't. And l didn't know her the way l know you now. OK, so l'll see you later, all right? Tomorrow. l would let you in and everything, but... it's late, and you got to get home... and my parents will be here any minute. l understand completely. lt's not a problem. Kid, wait. What? What are we doing here? We were doing fine until you stopped me. A few minutes ago... you were trying to make a date with my best friend. This isn't right. lt's not right? l'll tell you what's not right-- the way you keep fronting on me. So all you want is sex, even from best friends? l ain't forcing you to do nothing. lf you want me to leave, fine. No problem. Wait, wait, wait. Sidney, wait up. What is it you're asking me? l'm not asking for anything. lt's about what you want. This is a trick question, right? l ain't going to lie. l'm attracted to both of you... but if l have to make a choice... and that seems to be what you're asking-- then you're who l want as a friend. lf you go with someone... you should be friends as well as lovers. So now that we're friends... let's get with the loving. You think you slick, huh? Now l have a question for you. What? Are you on the pill? No. l don't do this regular. What about one of those diagrams? That's diaphragm, and l don't do sponges, either. Don't you have a whatchamacallit in your wallet? l knew this would come in handy. lt's been in here a while. Still good. All right. l guess it's been in here a little too long. So, now what? Have you ever... No, l never, no. l don't know why l asked that. l don't even know why l asked about birth control. Most guys wouldn't care if you had it or not. That's why l like you. There'll be other times. lt'll probably be a long time from now. Sorry, Kid. That's what they call me. "Sorry Kid." That's not what l call you. Get out of the way! What are you doing? l'm supposed to be in my bedclothes. l don't know whether to watch or run. Hurry up. l don't know how those hoodlums got into the party. You should've pressed charges. Not with those fascist cops there. lf l'd met that hoodlum in the street, man to boy... l'd punch him in his snot locker. You know l don't like to be sucker-punched. You've tried it a couple of times. What are you doing? Are you crazy? -How am l supposed to get out? -Back door! Mama? Sidney, you're awake. l decided to stay home after all. That's my little baby. Our little pumpkin stayed home all by herself. -ls that Princess? -l'll see. lt's probably nothing. See? lt stopped. l'm sleepy. l'm going to go to bed now. My back! Those cops are always *** with-- My stomach. Shut up. He hit us all the same way. l'm tired of gettin' beat by punk cops, man. Pee-Wee, how does your ribs feel? They *** me up the same way they *** you up. Yo, look! Oh, yeah. After gettin' beat down by them cops... l'm ready to whip somebody's ***. Where you goin', longhair? Come here! Let "Hey Love..." Oh, my God! The classic sounds of sexy soul. Look at my hand again, you'll be like that man... Get some chicken, baby! There goes that broomhead albino! Get that *** now! Get him now! Get him ! Come on! ***' rat! Get off me, man! Oh, ***! Come on. What happened to homey's shoe? Freeze! Aw, ***! ***! Who's gonna explain that? What the *** you lookin' at? So this is how you got that Buckwheat fade. You stick your head in the icebox, right? l hear you're a rapper. l got a rap for your ***. You run around town like a *** in heat Me and my boys can't be beat Wherever you go, we can smell you like gas And we're gonna kick your ***' *** You got your silly *** locked in the icebox With nowhere to go What we should really do is take this refrigerator... and just dump that *** in the river. You ain't thinkin'. Where's your head at? Leave me the *** alone. Freeze, Negroes. Hey, let me out! This is your lucky day. lt was a jammin' party. There you go, there you go. -l got to talk to you. -Tell me tomorrow. l'm sorry, Ev. The brothers keep *** with me. You were real cool with me. Always remember that. But Kid's dad-- What the hell happened to Kid? He was supposed to help. l thought he was down. Peace out. Yo, move over, man. Move! Move! We've been going at this all day... since earlier in the lunchroom. lt hasn't gotten us anywhere but in here... which is where we don't want to be. Why don't we let bygones be bygones... and work together to get out of here? What do you say? Man, *** you. Looks like l'm in here for a couple of more days. So how's everything out on the street? You taking care of my business? What the-- l know the party's not over yet. Think so? That was wrong. Play in full effect. What up? Play, this is Kid. l'm in prison. Right, at your house. No, l'm not at home. l'm in jail for real. l need you to bail me out. Anybody there to borrow from? Just Bilal, packing up his equipment. Brothers ain't got no money. Hurry, man. My back's against the wall. Just give me a minute. We'll be right there. Just do me a favor. Don't pick up the soap. Like l need you to tell me that. That's why you can't be on C.P.T. l need you on Japanese people time. l'm depending on you. Are you gonna come down? -All right. -l'm serious. All right! All right, bye. -How much we got? -What? How much do we have? Don't holler at me, man. l'm telling you. Think they'll take a check? ***. l got to collect from the bums at my party. Think they'll give you money after you kicked them out? lt's the least they can do after breaking my toilet. How about the girls who left earlier with Kid? Boy, are you crazy? Kid's in jail. We need your help. -Jail? -Yeah. l should get in trouble 'cause he did? He didn't do nothing wrong. We're his friends. All we need is bail money. Bail money? He got a daddy. His daddy'll kick his ***. Should've thought of that before he did what he did. He is my boy and all, but damn. ***! Why you try and leave me? l saw you running like hell. No sense of both of us getting our *** kicked. Man, that's *** up. -Did you get the money? -No. She trippin'. That's the problem when l send a boy to do a man's job. A boy? Think you can do any better? Look, ***, l--Hi, Play. Hi. l know you ain't in bed. The party ain't over yet. After we go get Kid, we're going to Burger King. Burger King? A little bite to eat. Hang out a little while. lt's kind of late. Come on, for me. Wait out front. Don't forget your purse. Hey, Daisy. Heard you got quite a reputation at your school. Sweetest meat around. When we get finished, you gonna be even sweeter. Know what this man did? Tell him, Hatchett. l cut a man's heart out. Check that out. Tell him what you did, Rock. l beat a police sergeant, with his own club. And didn't run after he did it. Hell, no. What did you do? l used to run a day-care center. l called Sidney. She wants to come with us. l told her we'd pick her up. You got a couple of girlfriends l can meet? Has anybody ever told you your breath stinks? Damn! -*** you! -What? You heard. *** you! You mad 'cause you still a ***. l ain't no ***. l got a girlfriend. She just don't live around here, right? Dragon-breath. Hey, don't hit me. You got dragon-breath. Your *** is a little tart, too. ***, please. -Belch. -Shut up. That's what l thought. l got something to tell you. -You got juice? -Yes. Tell me. This l know. l don't believe you. What? That's right. So don't get mad. l ain't trippin'. You go, girl. Thank you, girl. Did l tell you how good you looked in that suit? Don't worry. Won't take but a minute. Depending on who's in it. ls there anything l can do to stop this? Richard Pryor said when he was in prison... he kept folks laughing to keep their minds off his ***. Do you know any jokes? No, l don't know any jokes. You better think of something. What if l can't think of anything? The light's out, the party's over... the cake's on the griddle, and you already greased. All right, you're first, my man. Let's go. All right. Let's go. Come on. Excuse me, everybody. Won't you gather around? l got something to say. Who is this clown? Just a guy who looks at things differently The way things are aren't how they're meant to be With the big men here in the bullpen l don't want my knees to take a full bend Step back, ask yourself, can it wait? Or do you want to become an AlDS candidate? Take your eyes off me, don't even watch the Kid Or you'll go out like Liberace did ln my own cell l could've been alone Why do you all want me? l'm only skin and bones l'm feeling faint, it's kind of hot My, what big muscles you got Hoo, lips don't fail me now Until Play comes to bail me out What's going on there? Man, this is too much, look but don't touch l'm just trying to avoid the bum rush Thought l was in here with murderers and stranglers You guys are a bunch of rump wranglers And why me? Look, l'm not the only male We gonna tie that fade into a ponytail Yo, this is a no-go, l'm gonna call the C.O. Me a ***? Nah, man, that's a no-no But if you back off now, that might save you time Off your sentence for good behavior l'm speaking from the heart, from the center The sign on my *** says "Do Not Enter" l'm a rapper, l rock rhymes, so l'm gonna bust one l see y'all wanna rock, like Hudson Just an example, l chill 'em and thrill 'em Where is Play? l'm gonna kill him Songbird, you hit the right note. You just made bail. Ha, hey, fellas, fellas Ha ha, l gotta go, all right? Don't feel bad, all right? Hey, no long faces, ha ha Think of all the fun we had l want to thank y'all for making me feel welcome lt really, really did the trick, all right? Oh, uh, by the way Suck my *** l'll kick your ***' ***! Punk! With that motivation, you could have rapped all night. l'm glad y'all came through for me finally. Would l let a homeboy down? So, you want to go out next week? -OK. -Good. -Call me. -l will. l don't get a kiss? A hug? Some form of affection? Come on, stop playing. Any lipstick on me? Yes! l knew it. Smooth operator. Bye, Sidney. Don't slob too loud. You'll wake the neighbors up. l'll see you later. This has been your night, boy! Cannot front. You are the dude. That must have been one hell of a walk home. Give me a play-by-play description. What color were the ***? We got into it, but then we didn't-- She was on her period? No, she wasn't on her period. What's up? l didn't have any rubbers. Hold up. She was down. Play knows these things. She was down. And you was down, and you didn't... 'cause you didn't have birth control? Let me explain-- We're talking about fine Sidney here. Good hair. Def body! That's who we're talking about. ls that all you're into? "Good hair. Def body." What are you talking about? l look at the face, too. That's ***. l'm not about having babies right now. That's her problem. You the man. She takes care of that or pays the price. -How can you say that? -You're naive. You're a ***' dog, and you, too, Rover. Yeah, l'm a dog. You sound like your pops. A guy your age shouldn't sound like your pops. You've got a problem. Yo, Kid. Chill for a minute. lt's still early, l got the crib... and you won't believe what's on the Late Show. "Krush Groove" and "Beat Street." ***, let's go to your house now and watch it. l really would like to see the movie... but it's really late, man. Tape it, and we'll watch it tomorrow. Peace out. -Peace, boy. -Peace. You know what l love was "Breakin'." l wonder when that ***'s coming on. l wouldn't do that just yet... 'cause your *** is mine. Pop, l can explain. l'm gonna whup that damn high-top fade off of you! l'm sick of your ***! l work too hard and too long to let you run over me... like you outta your damn mind. l walked across this damn city... got stopped by the *** law... lookin' for your monkey ***. All you kids over there just slow-dancing... doing the grind, and the peepin' and the hidin'. l know your ***. You was there, wasn't you? l run the show here. l wear the pants and the apron, and l'll wear your *** out! l'm gonna whup you till l'm sleepy. And l'm wide awoke 'cause l just woke up. You think because you're big and yellow... l'm supposed to be mellow. Hell, no! l'll start a fight in an empty room ! You can call Child Abuse if you want to! They better not come in here, 'cause l'll kick their ***, too. l'm gonna give you a whuppin' from now on. l'll whup the cowboy *** out from you. Gee, Pop. Now get your *** to bed! And don't wake up till l tell you to! l didn't mean it. l didn't know they were the rest of the cookies. My grandma's 87 years old. l don't know how many years she's got left to make cookies. You didn't have to finish the rest of them. l don't know how many years l've got left in my grandmother. They were good, though. Look at that.